Mon-Fri didn't approach any girls, took a deload week
Fri - report to post
Sat - Didn't go out
Sun - some DG, however no fruits (1 number, gonna hit her up again and see how it goes, failed to get a response yet)
Mon - some DG I think. Shit weather. Late at night. Not too many sets.. Nothing
Tue - wanted to game! didnt get time! Had a date ! Need to write about this
Wed - a few more sets, 1 number. Nothing worth writing yet.
(I write this at 6am about 5 days so bear with the shitty writing)
So I didn't talk to any girls Mon-Fri
Didn't even really leave my house all week except for to lift
Went to choir at 5.30
Hung out with girl from choir for a few hours, checked out a salsa party but it was dead for me
Wandered around, hit up a house party with a bunch of acquaintances; left very shortly after
Funny timing cause I was gonna go to my car and look for parties to crash
I am very fucked from all the training I've been doing and I barely feel alive
Went to a few clubs/bars; getting myself to open 1-2 girls per venue; so I got to about 5 or 6 in total, I wasn't really forcing myself
Made a new buddy, guy who said he recognised me from high school
Anyway, was walking to my car to call it a night, and literally 10 metres from my car some redhead sheila is walking and I jog up to her briefly and say hi
"Hey what are you up to"
"Oh I'm going to get food ... wrong way blah blah"
"blah blah blah... I'm going home, would you like to come home with me?"
"I love how straight up you are. I'm not gonna come home with you but we could do something else"
"Yeah let's go get fooed"
and she hops into my car immiediately without me even gesturing or saying!
we drive around and she gets a slice of pizza. I presume that she's vegeterian, find out she's Peruvian (same name as a peruvian chick I got with) raised in Canada
likes to dance etc I quickly seed a "favourite place" question (not even neccesary to do this imo, but it doesn't hurt) and we go for a drive there
I'm thinking quick comfort then take her home ASAP. Logistics aren't in my favour to bring her back home, but we make out etc in my car
And suddenly my sexual confidence comes back to me. A few recent failures, a "taking confidence for granted" in general attitude, and jerking off probably
decreased that confidence in my up til this point. I tell her that she's being turned on and that she wants to fuck me. I tell her to kiss my neck ...
I don't remember doing that with the last 2 girls, and it reminded me of the pulling days of Nov-Feb where I was smooth af.
She tells me she hates me, I tell her that hating me is good, cause it makes for better sex. Unfortunately she's on my period, (6am I'm sorry i write it like that)
and says sex is not possible and she won't suck me off. Maybe she took it out when she went to pee, I'm not sure; but I told her to take her pants off when she came back
to my car so I could feel her legs. I told her I wanted to be inside her. Eventually she resigned and we fucked in the car, uncomfortably.
I never came and it was difficult to stay hard in such a position. I also found out that front isn't that good for fucking. I'm glad I tried it, even though it wasn't
ideal, cause now i won't have to wonder what the front is like. I should also clean my fucking car so the back is tidier... and those bananas don't rot!
anyway the bitch didn't even offer me a bite from her pizza!
Blood sweat and tears and pussy period juice pops up onto my hand after sex
all in all, I'm faithful that I'll see her in a few days for dancing, and we'll make proper love. She's only here for 3 more weeks.
Good:
Sexually confident
Pushed myself to go out alone
Bonded with some cool dude
Opened sets despite tired af and not feeling it
I WARMED UP when I felt I wasn't capable of jumping into it. I simply said "fuck it I'll just go get rejected on purpose to feel more comfortable approaching"
and it tremendously tremendously helps
I persisted with the girl in my car cause she was quite resistant to sex
Told sex stories / fetishes etc to arouse her sexual mind
Didn't display signs of neediness (good!)
Step/move back to let her make a move
HAD SEX
Could improve:
Coulda talked a little less at times and been a little more smooth at other times by not looking or laughing weirdly
(I laugh heaps. I think it's cause I'm tired)
Get into pick-up mode faster.
Get more comfortable picking up in clubs as well.
Get more comfortable opening a girl who is with a group in a club. Ths one is pretty hard for me here. Bars tend to be easier
Making use of frames from pitch anything?
Okay, now TUESDAY
Met up with the same girl. Took her to salsa, vibe between us wasn't high.
Midway through she told me that she didn't feel like hooking up tonight and that we weren't gonna have sex. I was trying to re-route logistics and see if I could get a chance to be alone with her for any other reason, ie to hang out and chat, watch a movie or play a board game; and use that chance to get in her in the mood. You can't say you're not in the mood for the rest of the night just cause you're not in the mood now!
I was a little logical and a little sexual. I just decided to leave after that. I probably would've stayed for another 2-3 dances since I had felt a little drained anyway.
She said had I taken her out for a quiet drink it may end happen, but the salsa was just too chaotic and loud and of course we're not at the same skill level.
Anyway here were my key fuck-ups:
TOO GAMEY and not straight up!
We were going to meet in the SPAM but I suggested I pick her up and I did. Well I tried to use that opportunity to pull her before we go out; but something went on. I think it's cause I SERIOUSLY overthought it beforehand. I wasn't able to get her back in. As we were driving away she said you could've just texted me that.
Honestly, I don't know what the fuck happened.. Probably not straight up enough. Honestly it bothered me a little
I didn't even fucking MAKEOUT with her when she hopped in my car! Fucking awesome way to set up a friendly vibe and fuck it up
I won't even both taking out a girl like that without a strong emotional connection. I thought Salsa would make a connection, but honestly I shouldn't have mentioned it. Should have kept quiet, met up for a drink at her place and fucked her again (though I did agree to Salsa before I fucked her lol).
Then fuck a girl multiple times, like 3 times, before considering taking her out.
I did my UTMOST to be non reactive. Infact I was quite non reactive but deep down I felt like I was on fire. I was really looking to this date and to getting laid, I dunno; it was really on my mind non stop; not having been laid properly in about 2-3 months and then having fucked her. When I left the bar i was literally on FIRE fucking raging. I went for a 6 plate (260kg/573lb) deadlift that night around 1am; didn't break it past my knees though.
the BAD thing was that had I kept a COOL HEAD, I could've gone to the girl I had agreed with to go for a cup of tea from the week previous, me and her were meant to go tonight. FUCK I only realised this an hour later. CONSIDER YOUR POSSIBILITIES! A cool head and maybe I could've pulled elsewhere even!
I met another girl briefly in the park at 1130 and we had a quick instadate, I just wanted to get the bailing Peruvian chick off my mind.
Lots of mental energy invested in this girl tonight. Too horny too excited, no other options.
Good things : perfect blend of banter and flirting, not talking too much, being enthusiastic in the dancing, giving her some space at the bar to dance with others and enjoy herself, didn't feel I displayed too much neediness externally; although internally I still felt lingers of it (that's bad, but the good list needed to be bulked up)
Needless to say, I cried for like an hour afterwards. If you're reading this, Miss S from Peru, I was crying cause of experiencing lots of failures recently and this stacked on top. Not cause of this rejection.
Wednesday
==========
1 number. Bumped into Peruvian chick on the street while I was chatting up another girl nonchalantly. Lol. Exchanged greetings.
Donated plasma.
Feeling more resilient, stronger and more determined than ever. Feeling hungrier with the weights and for the girls. Willing to push myself to new levels of discomfort again, far beyond yesterday. I experienced a serious personality change this afternoon. Despite feeling like shit last night, I still feel waaay more confident about going out alone and pulling.
Opened a boy-girl set in McDonalds. Good job.
Was very self amusing and laughing the whole 60-80 mins I was out
Started adding in 100 pull ups and 10x10 calf raises (at 100kg minimum) to my DAILY routine. I'm going to
ABSOLUTELY DOMINATE IN MY WEIGHT CLASS AND EVEN A CLASS AHEAD. DOMINATE SO FUCKING INTENSELY I'D BE ABLE TO WIN WITH A WARM UP. THOSE POWERLIFTERS CAN SUCK MY DICK, FOR THEY KNOW I DO NOT SUBMIT, AND SO TOO CAN THE HOT POWERLIFTING CHICKS, LITERALLY.