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Hi guys,
Have a new girlfriend for 3 months now, been dating 3 months before i made her my GF so i know her about 6 months total. When we were dating she told me she has this guy best friend who she has for years, i told her at that time i don't believe in guys and girls being best friends because there is always 1 of the 2 who secretly wants more.... hows your personal view on this thought? She said this is bullshit blablabla guys and girls can be best friends...
Now she moved back to her old city where he lives so she spends more time with him now, just sended me some snaps of them drinking in a bar alone... i am a stable guy but this got me a bit jealous and i don't really like my girlfriend drinking with another dude 1v1 regardless if its her best friend, she also has a ring that she got from him years back, all this shit got me in a place i used to be in when i was younger and i don't like the games that are involved.
Do i call her out on it and become the jealous insecure boyfriend or play it cool? My thought is to play it cool but i don't like being disrespected either..
So right out of the gate you two have an incompatible belief.
How important is holding onto this belief? If its a deal breaker for you then this won't work. You're waisting your time with this person as you're clearly going to experience a lot of resistance. If its something you decide is impeding your ability to have LTRs then perhaps its a good idea to explore the belief and whether its worth holding onto.
Is this more about setting boundaries rather than beliefs about male / female friendships?
-her being in close proximity to him
-having drinks 1 on 1 together whilst snapping
-her having a ring from him (does she wear it?)
They sound like close friends, do you feel they have a history beyond friendship?