Oh dear.. it's happened again



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PostPosted: Wed Mar 15, 2017 2:14 pm 
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Ok so I met up with this girl on tinder last Friday..

Date went really well I though - looks of mutual flirting and even the odd bit of footsie (I called her out on it)

we message for a few days after and then I received the hum-dinger...

"Listen I've been thinking about this and I don't want to lead you on... not sure there is anything more than Friends here"

So i'm literally like wtf... wait a few days... message her and ask her out again..

she replies "sure i'm open to meeting again but don't want to lead you on"

I know what all of you are thinking.. "move on bro, she doesn't care"

and after nearly 10 years in the game I would almost agree with you.. but unfortunately moving on will not feature in my vocab for this one....


considering the date actually went well... thoughts on how to proceed?

this is how it went in a nutshell....

Initial text including the day 1 - cocky funny, playful etc.
after the day 1 - toned it down slightly (wanted to calibrate a little if I was a bit too cocky)

few days after receive the "just wanna be friends" text..



thinking I reply with something cocky funny again... perhaps a dis-qualifier of sorts - get her out on a day 2 and then keep trying until she caves.

My thinking has always been that persistence beats resistance. And before you say anything.... it has worked for me :)

constructive comments always welcome. Cheers fellas!


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PostPosted: Wed Mar 15, 2017 3:15 pm 
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The Grand Puba
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haris1212 wrote:
I know what all of you are thinking.. "move on bro, she doesn't care"
Not sure why you'd say we'd be thinking this. Her actions didn't match her words and most of us here will always tell you to pay attention to a woman's actions. If this woman talked about how into you she is and wanted to build a future with you but refused to meet up with you, we'd be telling you that her words didn't match her actions and to move on.


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PostPosted: Wed Mar 15, 2017 3:42 pm 
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King Among Mortals
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Quote:
Date went really well I though - looks of mutual flirting and even the odd bit of footsie (I called her out on it)

we message for a few days after and then I received the hum-dinger...

"Listen I've been thinking about this and I don't want to lead you on... not sure there is anything more than Friends here"


Jack is spot on. But if I may add.

Some will say she's 'shit testing' you or bullshit like it, when all she's saying/doing is "I'd like to fuck you soon, but if you'er gonna get all needy afterwards, I'll ghost you but fucking quick!" Just shrug, say "okay" and move forward.

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PostPosted: Wed Mar 15, 2017 4:56 pm 
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Heywood Jawblowme,

thanks for the response (both of you actually) however i'm struggling to understand the next move still -

are you telling me that I should just continue as normal and not be phased by her text ?

Or

are you telling me just to move on... haha...

you can guess what i'm thinking.

thanks

B


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PostPosted: Wed Mar 15, 2017 5:02 pm 
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The Grand Puba
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haris1212 wrote:
I should just continue as normal and not be phased by her text


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PostPosted: Thu Mar 16, 2017 7:29 am 
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Absolute heros. Thanks alot. No idea why i doubted myself


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 17, 2017 6:12 pm 
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Read My Book
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10 years in the game...

Which 10 years are we talking?

Now while, anything is possible, I have no interest in playing these kinds of games. What happened other than the footsies? Did you escalate beyond foot cuddles? Anything? And why not? I find it hard to imagine with the level of experience you proclaim that you just played footsies with a girl and made no move beyond that..

It also sounds like she had a boyfriend or someone she recently started seeing. Girls have this habit of going on one or two mores dates after they meet a guy they like just to make sure its real.

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