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Are you kidding?
If you don't want to lose her so badly then why the hell didn't you get with her over your girlfriend of the time in the first place. I think you're full of it, and that you don't actually like her, that you're only trying to get with her now because your situation didn't work out. Had you and your girl still been together you wouldn't be contacting this girl and experiencing this emotions now.
Stop being weak. You just want to run to the next thing as fast as you can because you don't have anything. Stand on your own two and find a new girl. What you have to understand that a large part of the reason this girl fell for you so much is because you were texting her from an abundance mindset because you already had someone. You feel like a "stranger" because you are no longer in possession of the abundance mindset that having a girlfriend once afforded you. You now have a needy( i don't wanna lose her) mindset and so when you communicate her she cannot recognize you because that is not the guy that she once fell for.
Get over yourself and stop being scared. You'll be fine without her. You didn't need her a month ago and you don't need her now. Focusing on getting you together and expanding your options so that if you do talk to her again at least you'll be familiar.
Well, it is a bit more complicated, i wanted to break-up with my ex and get together with this girl, however, my ex's mother died unexpectedly and there was no way i could leave her when she was going through such harsh times, so the reason i dumped that girl before was because i felt guilty, so i ended all communication with her and i told her that i have a girl, and it was really a hard move to make because i wanted her but morally it was just the right thing to do at the time. I knew that once i become single i must have her.
My mindset is not that different i believe, i am a fun guy, and i know how to make a girl laugh and i am a great tease, however, the problem is that now i cannot even deliver my mindset to her because her entire mind is clouded with the fact that i kept lying to her for an entire month before that i was single, and i wasn't. It feels like she doesn't trust me, and i honestly don't know if she is attracted to me or not, it is really hard to figure it out. She wants to meet again, and she said we can go out together, but at the same time she responds to my texts with a damn Emoji, or with a single word, as if she doesn't give a sh8t about me anymore.
I don't know what to do, i know i can meet a new girl, but i want to my best with this girl, if it fails and doesn't work out, i will move on, but i don't know what to do !
So heres my question..
Did you leave your old girlfriend or did she leave you?
And its not that she doesn't give a shit anymore, she's just loving the power from the fact that some guy that paid her minimal attention because he had someone is now pathetically drooling and obsessed with her. Its fun. It's an emotional validation dream for her.
I broke up with my ex. Then after a month of being single i contacted my 'crush', she felt pretty weird that i contacted her because the way i dumped her was just so rude, i wrote her a few messages and goodbye, i really hurt her, not only because how i dumped her but also because she found out that i was a damn lier. She is really a sweet innocent type of girl, she is beautiful too, she goes to church every sunday, looks after her grandparents, she hates one-night stands, she only believes in LTRs, she very seldom goes to bars, she believes people should have their first kiss only after like many dates, i think you get the point. Yesterday i even found out she kept all the images and selfies that i sent to her before saved on her laptop, literally all of them, she didn't delete them.
Generally, i felt pretty confident that once i contact her again she will come back running to my arms because she really was so crazy about me before. However, turns out i was overly confident, because it seems that her emotions towards me faded away, she has been pretty 'distant' to me in the way she talks to me, she let me know in advance that we can try and go out and dates, but she said that she doesn't 'promise' it will work out because i feel like a stranger to her now, and that she can't stop thinking that i lied to her.
We went to a cinema and a restaurant, our first date, i was being fun and i tried to get physical, by hugging her at every opportunity i got when we were out because it is freezing here, in the cinema i grabbed and held her hand for a while, but then she took it away from me and told me that 'take it slow, i am not ready for this, i can't stop thinking how those beautiful eyes could lie so much', she even refused that i drive her home, so she took a cab back and told me that she doesn't want to rush anywhere until she 'heals' inside, that i should be 'patient' because she doesn't want to make another mistake and get hurt. There might be something to this because she had 3 boyfriends before me and they all cheated on her, and dumped her!
When we text, i am not being needy, i try to get her talk by sharing fun stuff with her, i tell her some little secrets, i ask her about her own stuff, i tease her a bit and so on. Yesterday she asked me 'do you like me and find me attractive, please be honest', that's the point where i did fuck up a bit perhaps, i told her of course, why do you even have to ask, i would love if we were together and i said some more stuff because i was an idiot last evening. Basically, now she knows i want her like mad, and she is the fuc8ing boss! Today she didn't even text me herself spontaneously, she only responsed to a few of my own texts.
It feels bad, how do i get out of this? Is it really all about this power dynamics or is there more to it? What should i do? She now has this emotional validation thing, having me tied around her fingers, what do i do now if i still want to have her? However, don't forget that we are still 'dating' and we are going out again next week, but it is just weird.
CHAT
laughed at that nuclear bomb advice