Hopefully this is the correct sub. I'm old and have always had very little success with girls.
So I've made maybe 50 approaches or so now since reading a few books on game, watching vids, and deciding to give it another go so as to avoid dying a 'nearly' virgin.
The first approach was an F-close! And then the next 49 were all fairly bad interactions, with the exception of one where I was able to make out with a girl.
With most of those 48 bad approaches, I was often ignored after my opener, or I ran out of things to say straight away, or I completely lost the girls interest, or, in one case, the girls pretended to be foreign and not understand me in order to get away!
So, my thoughts: (i'd appreciate thoughts on these)
Firstly, i'm wondering whether i'm drinking too much. I only do night game and like to think I can handle my beer, but last night I heard a recording of myself from Saturday night (and not even at the end of the night) and I could hear myself getting words mixed up and sounding pretty damn drunk. So, for one i'm hoping that I can use this as a possible factor in my lack of success.
Secondly, My openers. I've noticed a pattern (if you can call it that)
Both of my only 2 good interractions happened after I opened using canned openers/bordeline routines. (basically pretending to know the girl from som ridiculous made-up event to make her laugh)
However, when i open in a 'normal/natural' way, the interraction is often very formal and stilted.
It all started when I was getting stuck with 'openers' and people kept screaming at me ''Just say 'hi'!!!''.
But what then happened was I'd find myself walking up too a girl, smiling and saying 'hi'' and then have her look a bit confused as to why a stranger was talking to her, but she'd reluctantly say 'hi' back, and then I'd kind of have nothing! I had one or 2 very awkward situations where I just looked at her after she said hi!!
I think I was stupidly waiting for her to carry the conversation.
I now realise that it's all on me, but at the same time, I feel I have to open with something silly in order to inject some fun into the interactino to stop it from being like a job interview
Thirdly
Conversation starters. Not openers. But what to say after teh opener. Personally, i'll tend to ask who they are with or how their night is going or sometihng. Is there any magic to this? Am I missing some good 'conversation starters' that i've yet to discover? How would you guys start a convo after opening with a random girl in a bar?
fourthly
Being unable to implement things and 'lines' that i've read. Even forgetting how to react to a shit test (so instead of agreeing/amplify, i'll be defensive, even though i know it's wrong, But in the moment I forget).
It's like, even though i've read a number of books now, I'm still not really sure what i'm supposed to be doing. I'll be talking to a girl, and i'm thinking, ''right...we're having a conversation. Am I supposed to say something now to move onto the seduction stage? In fact, what stage am I even at? What are the sort of line/things that i'm supposed to start saying now?'' etc etc
So I kind of don't know what i'm supposed to be doing, and even if I did, my brain is working so hard to work it out, that I come across like a nervous robot since i'm using all of my brain power on sorting and retrieving the info~!
Lastly, i'm wondering if reading about the success of others is hurting my self esteem/confidence too much. I was reading some pickup forums earlier, and everyone is lke ''just banged by 60th girl of the year. It's too easy bla bla bla'' and i'm not sure whether people are just making it up, or whether there's something wrong with me which means i'm unable to learn in the way these guys clearly do (asuming they're not just living a fantasy). Or i'm just leGit UGLY!!!!
I've probably missed some stuff, but they're my main thoughts for now.