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PostPosted: Sun Jul 03, 2016 12:11 pm 
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Joined: Thu Jul 14, 2011 11:57 pm
Posts: 1
I think I need a different perspective on how to spice up the way I feel/think about social interactions with females when things get dull for me.

One of my biggest mood killers when talking to females is when I feel like I have to work for them. Being playful, doing cube routine and what not. On the surface on many occasions everything might seem super jay with both sides (both me and the girl) but to me it's the same shit on a different day. I feel that I am making them laugh but it drains me emotionally. I feel like I am making everything happen but they are not doing shit to make me feel good.

I lean back a lot in conversations and of course females will talk and ask me questions (there are no awkward silences that people describe a lot in this forum, I have never voids in my conversations) but I still feel so fucking bored. A year ago after I became single, it was interesting to get laid. But at the moment just the thought about fucking isn't making me want to do shit. I am interested in being inspired, I want to feel ALIVE.

I feel alive when people have unique perspectives to life, when they dare to be stupid/outrageous/crazy and act like nobody is looking.. I like people who don't give a fuck and are spontaneous. But there are just so few of these matching personalities and I think its me who is at blame.

I have started even to shut up entirely during conversations for minutes because I just lack the motivation to pursue them. On my last date girl told me that she had never had so unique date before and I felt like she is just a regular female who I am never going to call again. It is not always like this though, sometimes I do have fun but not with most of I encounter and they drain me emotionally so much that I don't feel like dating for weeks.

I should note that I have mostly gotten my dates from Tinder the past year. I have never been a bar/nightclub person because it is really hard to have any decent conversation there.
I did try day game and I kinda liked it but the moment I feel the one being the super fun dude, I loose interest.

I feel as if I like aliens or homeless people.


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 01, 2016 4:57 pm 
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Joined: Sun Oct 20, 2013 3:32 am
Posts: 210
I've been where you are. It's partially embracing the workload required to make things work as well as not being outcome oriented. If you believe you can "get the girl" then you will not feel a motivation to find out. You are certain you could. However, you never know until you try. Dismissing life this way is boring in itself because you are viewing it as two dimensional. I even got into self sabotage to make my life more interesting. I worked on making the "work" part of my ingrained persona. Of course then it felt effortless. Humans won't continue to make an effort if the workload feels tiresome. Especially if you think of it as a gimmick or something. That's why I transitioned to no routines. It's more challenging, natural, and rewarding.

You aren't challenged enough. You don't have adrenaline or epinephrine coursing through your veins. Go live a life more exciting. Push your personal boundaries and goals. That doesn't just mean with women. If you aim to enjoy a woman's company then that's good enough to meet your needs. However, you have to meet your own needs and not depend on other people to satisfy you. It's common. Better to recognize you are in a stale rut now than later. You just need to connect emotionally with what you are doing. Being bored is a perspective. You've outgrown your goals as far as your skills. Time to get uncomfortable


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