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PostPosted: Sun May 06, 2012 1:00 pm 
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Mr. Chase

Went out last night implementing the "let her chase" mentality and see how it would work. I arrived at the club and there were 2 girls which I knew from before. One of them was the best friend of a friend of mine, which I've known for a while, but have never really had success with (every time I take her hands or start dancing close, she backs up a bit) let's call this one "friendster". With the other girl it's a bit unpredictable, one time she behaves interested, other times not, let's call this one "assster" cause the way she dances with her ass is what turned me on in the first place.

Song of the night was definetly this one:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=89baKJzsJx4[/youtube]

Friendster

So the first girl I see is friendster. Because last time I saw her at a party I was calling her hotstuff and whatnot, I thought to hold it back a little this time. So I kind of ignored her most of the time and only gave her little attention. When she came to tell me something unimportant I responded with a smile on my face and a look of - what you're saying is silly- "haha you must be kind of stoned" and carried on partying. 10 minutes later she pulls me towards her and say "Hey, I'm not stoned!" (she most of the times is). I thought it was on, so I say "yea sure and start dancing close to her again, she backs off again .. I didn't give her any attention anymore, a friend of me said she was looking at me alot after that.

Assster

I walk to the chill lounge and come across assster, I give her a kiss on the jaw and ask how she is, she says good and you? I respond with a smile "chillll" and walk on. For the rest of the party I didn't see he. So just before me and some friends would leave, we went to check it out. She was sitting at the chill lounge with some guys she knew (and was making out with one of them last party). I gave her a whatsup look and went sit down a bit further with my friend and didn't look at her again. We didn't sit there long but my friend said again to me that this chick was looking at me ..

Oldster

My friends and I went to another club, walked in and I was immediatly thinking "holy shit". Standing there was my old fuckbuddy (no she isn't old in that way ;p). I hadn't seen her for 8 months and I didn't reply to her texts anymore coz I didn't like her that much anymore. I thought she would be kind of pissed, but she was all over me in no time. I told her I wasn't going to kiss her, but almost kiss her, so I lent in and barely touched her lips. Did this a few seconds then I turned her around, making her ass face me, pushed her over a bit and said jokingly"now I will almost take you". She laughed, turned around, I danced with her. I wanted to try a bold move so I put my hands between her legs and rubbed one second. She was shocked and reacted in a 'what the fuck are you doing??' way. I laughed at her, talked a bit more and then left. Next day I get a text of her "you left and didn't say goodbye, so friendly ... " and "I hope I didn't bother you too much last night". Anyway I'm not interested in this one anymore.

I'm curious what the mentality will bring as a result, especially with the first two girls. Ok, apparently they were checking me out alot, but what will happen next? I guess I'll just leave it in the girls hands to hit me up or not.


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 13, 2015 10:22 pm 
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Chapter SE: Jag bor i Sverige

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Or for the people that don't talk Swedish (neither do I) "I live in Sweden".

I recently moved to Sweden for the following 5 months and decided this would be the perfect moment to get back on track.
It's the perfect opportunity, I don't know anybody here and can be whoever I want to be.

Number one on the agenda: Build a social circle from zero


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PostPosted: Fri Feb 13, 2015 10:57 pm 
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Riding solo to the parties!

What better way to start building your social life than going to a student party?
So I decided to go on my own to a student bar where there was a party (because yeah, I don't know anyone here)

Ofcourse I was nervous, I've never gone to a party alone. So I decided to get tipsy before going in.
I was lucky I met this guy in line who ended up inviting me to their table. I started talking to their group of 3 and some of their friends joined us. Had some awesome conversations with them and then decided I wanted to go dancing.

That French hotness

I realised that the big trick to going out solo is to high five / say hi to everyone. I switched groups after a while and was now dancing with three girls, when suddenly this smoking hot french girl and her friend are dancing next to us. I'm not sure how it got started, but we ended up talking and joking with eachother. She grabs my hand and pulls me a bit further than where her friends were. We start dancing and talking some more. Things were going great, but then ofcourse..

Her friends come in and pull her away.

I go dancing with the 3 girls again and see her a little bit later again. So ofcourse I go in again so I could realise my french maid fantasy. We start laughing again, but then ofcourse ..

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One of her guy friends got jealous and comes inbetween. When later that night I talked to her again, you never guess what, he came inbetween again. At this point it was rather getting frustrating, but that wasn't the end of it. I decide to go for her number because I'm sick of all this interference. She's now dancing with another guy she knows while I'm dancing next to her. She's touching my ass and I'm touching her ass while the guy doesn't see it. I pull her away and say if she wants to chill some time, she should put her number in my phone. The guy ofcourse didn't like this so he comes inbetween and pushes me away a bit. I say Hi to him and ask if she's his girlfriend. He says yes, I look him in the eyes and repeat "SO THIS is your girlfriend?"

He admits, no she isn't she's just a friend. The problem is that the girl with the friend there, goes into this don't wanna seem slutty mode. When I ask for her number now she says, she has the same number as the guy. The guy came too close again to me, I guess trying to intimidate me. So I had enough of this. I said to him "Were you just trying to kiss me?" He tells me no, so I say "That's totally fine man, here let me kiss you!"

so I give him a peck in the neck just to confuse the fuck out of him, the girl starts laughing hard, I shook the girls hand and said it was nice meeting her and left them both in confusion behind me.

Later on that night I've seen her dancing with couple of other dudes, so I think she was just there for all the attention. Still afterwards I had this annoying feeling that I didn't do good enough.


Anyhow, had a pretty cool night, met some people and got invited to some events!

Tomorrow I'm going to another party on my own, so let's see how that goes!
Stay tuned!


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PostPosted: Sun Feb 15, 2015 12:34 pm 
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Cupid's incompetence

So I rocked out solo last night..

Before going out I figured out a foolproof way to go about my evening. The brilliant plan was as following:
Say hi to girls on valentines => Get laid

Actually, the real plan was a thing called working the room. Which is basically saying hi to / high five people there, having very short interactions with them and working your way through the room like this. Afterwards it should be easy to go in conversation with the people you did this with

I felt somewhat down during the day, so I kind of hyped myself up before going to the party. Did this by thinking that it's awesome of myself that I'm daring to go out solo and by getting a little tipsy with the help of my friend

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First club

I arrive at the first club I planned to work the room. As I enter the room, I notice it's not so crowded yet. The second thing I noticed is that alot of people were between 30-40 years old. Anyhow, I walk around the room pretending I'm looking for someone and I start feeling awkward because everyone is in groups and the room is not so full yet. I get nervous and walk outside, not confident enough to work the room.

I start talking to a guy outside about the entrance fee and tell him that I'm still waiting for my friends to arrive but they seem to take a long time(which was a lie, but I didn't want to seem like a loner). He says it's cool and invites me to their group. I talk with a few guys and girls there, but really superficial as I feel like kind of the new guy that is intruding on their group. After a while I said I was going to another club and said goodbye to them.

Second club

I arrive at the second club and after being lost for about an hour I finally found the place. This club is more packed and has alot more young people. Some of the Swedish girls I saw there were real jaw droppers and were dressed in a such a way that you've already Imagined having sex with her in 15 different positions after the first second of seeing her. Instead I had some small conversations with some dudes but ended up just dancing in front of the DJ... I saw a girl who was standing alone because her friend was talking to a guy (in english), so I went over and asked if she as an exchange student. She answerred very shortly and turned away. So I start dancing again, but feeling that this night isn't going anywhere.

After a while three guys and a chick start dancing next to me and were super friendly, introduced myself to them and in the end I ended up partyinh and getting wasted with them for the rest of the night. One of them wanted me to feel welcome in Sweden so he was buying me drinks (no homo). Had fun with them, but noticed however that I was also avoiding to approach chicks.


Waiting for the train to get home I have another one of these *sigh* moments, because somewhere I have this feeling that I have the potential to do much better, but it isn't coming out.


Lessons learned
- I always seem to wait before approaching someone and try to make eye contact to assess whether they would talk to me or not. But I guess I should have the guts to do so no matter what.
- I'm avoiding to approach chicks when I'm standing there alone, thinking it will fail anyway


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PostPosted: Mon Mar 02, 2015 1:30 pm 
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Understanding the gears

Everytime I start something new I'm motivated for a little while and take some action, but in a small amount of time I'm back at my normal settings. It seems like one part of me is highly motivated to do something one day, but the other day the 'comfort' part of me takes over and makes me feel like change isn't something I need. This is in almost all areas of my life. I want to change this, because taking control and being able to persist with new habbits seems like the most important thing to do right now. I've been a procrastinator for as long as I can remember, that's why there are so many holes in my journal and why I've been slacking in school, business and pick up.

Today I picked up a program by, well let's say one of the more famous self improvement coaches. In the next days up until the program ends I'll be journalling about my progress and what I've learned from it. Hopefully I'll end up having a better understanding of myself when it ends.

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PostPosted: Tue Mar 03, 2015 1:04 am 
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Focus

It's kind of late here, but I finally managed to get through the first session. If I don't commit to this now, I'll never do it. Here are a few things I learned from the first day.

- Up till now I've learned that I've been putting my focus on the wrong things. Instead of focussing on the good side of things, the benefits, I've been focussing on the bad side. Instead of seeing the beauty and joy of meeting new people, I've been focussing on the rejections and fears that might come with it. I need to start focussing on the progress and joy instead of the fear and failure of the challenges. I must define my goals clearly so I can focus on them and when I do, focus on the positive sides of it, give it an empowerring meaning.

- There's an inner conflict inside of me that needs to get resolved, let's say a Jack and a Tyler are fighting over control. Tyler wants me to become the person that I would like to be in my thoughts, while Jack doesn't think change is possivle and doesn't want to get hurt.

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PostPosted: Wed Mar 04, 2015 12:40 am 
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Patterns

Today during a nightwalk I was thinking about the audio I heard during the day of the program. The guy was talking about gratitude. It made me think about what I was grateful for. The most important thing I came to realize is that I have great parents, but for the last couple of years kind of took them from granted. I've been too self absorbed, focussing on myself and didn't give them the attention and respect I should give them. I will mail them tomorrow.

The audio taught me a couple of tricks to manage my state and to give different, more positive meanings to the things that I focus on or feel. I'm putting my expectations higher and will train myself to shift from a negative / procrastinating state of mind to a productive and efficient one.

From tomorrow on I will take half an hour in the morning to do some exercise, think what I'm grateful for and think about what I want to create in my life. In the evening I'll make a list of the things I want for the next day.

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PostPosted: Thu Mar 05, 2015 1:16 am 
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A word on failure
(The following message is probably mostly directed at myself)

If you think about it, when we call something a failure it's when we don't immediatly get the outcome we are after.

How nuts is it actually to expect that without any experience, without any practise we immediatly expect to get the outcome we want? And worse, when it doesn't happen we call it a failure.

If this would be a reasonable expectation then there's no path from A, where you want to be, to B ,your goals. You just expecteded to teleport there. What people call failure is actually just the path/journey everyone has to walk towards their goal. The path to success is not getting the outcome you want just yet, but you're making adjustments to get closer and closer to your goal. You're walking the path, you're not failing. The goal wouldn't be there and it woudln't be called goal if you were already there (which is basically what you're expecting when you call things a failure).

So stop being so negative and start calling it progress or path to success instead of calling it failure.


Tomorrow I'll need to specify clearly what I'm after, what my outcome is for this journal.


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PostPosted: Sat May 09, 2015 10:15 pm 
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Scarcity vs love

Things got messy the last month. I hadn't got laid for a while, but then a girl from the past started contacting me again. I used to have something with her without attachments, but then she got a boyfriend. She came over and we had an amazing (sexy) time for two days. When she travelled back home again I felt like shit. I kept feeling like shit for the following weeks. I got into this unproductive/procrastinating period. I started getting nervous about whether or not she replies, what I should text her and stuff. I was feeling like I was losing her again, she was getting cold.

There hasn't passed a day by that I haven't thought about texting her or trying to understand why she went cold. Thinking about what I should do about it and how I can fix it. I started doubting whether I should contact her and tell her how I feel. But then decided that would be a bad plan as she's pulling away a bit. I hate that I feel this way, I'd much rather let go. I tried stuff like thinking about things I don't like about her, which helped temporarily.

The weird thing is that it doesn't seem to be about her even anymore. I'm not even sure if I would want a relationship with her, but my mind is just torturing me with all kinds of scenarios and trying to figure this out. It's stressful and keeps my mind busy too much, drifting my focus away. I just want to go back to the status quo of not caring so much about what happens with it.

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I haven't had a girl before with whom it clicked as good as with her. She knows alot about me and that's probably why I started caring. If she, who knows me better than any girl wouldn't want anything with me, it would hurt me/make me feel insecure (my ego probably). This combined with the fact that I haven't been seeing girls for a while, makes a strong case that it's just scarcity.

*****But how you know the difference with falling in love with someone, I have yet to figure out.


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PostPosted: Mon May 11, 2015 12:00 am 
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Setting goals

a. Goals
  • Beating procrastination and jumpiness
    - Writing in my journal at least once a week for the next 3 months
    - Implementing productive habbits
    - Finish my thesis within a month = finish it @ june 1th
  • Having the habbit of approaching - before september
    - May: stuck with thesis, but should do at least 15 approaches
    - June: 30 approaches
    - July: 70 approaches
    - August: 40 approaches
  • Having sex with 5 new girls - before september
  • Getting a better understanding of my fears and develop strong principles / beliefs
  • Having a MFF threesome - before 2016
  • Having a great body
    - putting on 5kg of muscle (11lbs) - 1 year

b. What I am lacking
  • Something to remind me daily of my goals and of the reasons I must accomplish them
  • Decent planning of my days/weeks
  • Productive habbits to get closer to my goals
  • The mental switch to go from lazy/procrastinating mindset to a productive one
  • High confidence / control my mindset and focus on the positive
    - Abundance (not being needy)
    - I often have negative self fulfilling proficies / expect things to fail
    - I often get sidetracked and lose focus
    - I care too much what people think of me
  • A more structured approach to game
  • A good understanding of what confidence is and how to build + maintain it
  • A strategy of conquering fears

c. Solutions

* Meditate 15 minutes right when I wake up => learning to have more focus
* Visualize each of the above goals as if I already accomplished them after meditation => reminder
* Write a to do list in evening for the next day & check it in the morning
* Read 6 pillars of self esteem => understanding self esteem better
* Read 3% man => on what it means being a man & abundance
* Approach with low risk openers when avoiding the approach, build up to something better. Remember some canned lines if that is what it takes, or do a hit and run.
* Check out some product by Julien where he breaks his game down => more structured approach
* Promote for a club => approaching tons & building on social skills + alot of rejection -> care less


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