Hey guys. I have not been on here in quite a while, nor sharing as much as i would have liked to(coaching con-stop).
I wanted to post this article i wrote with regards to approach anxiety, and the fact that really, it is not a thing. Instead, it is something you have been taught by the large amounts of pick up information out there. Basically, coming from the wrong place.
What im about to share, is what i use with my students/clients with pretty much a 100 percent success rate.
If you apply and understand, you will be much more free to act from the correct and naturally healthy place.
Destroy Approach Anxiety FOREVER - Seriously
-How to Approach & Attract Women From a Sexually Magnetizing Place-
First of all I would like to begin by stating that approach anxiety does not even exist. Basically, I had to use a fancy headline to get you to bother your arse reading it, why?...because most men, will only take the time to take action and do something, if they gain from that action...if they can take value from it, and THIS gentlemen, is why you feel anxiety when you have the intention of approaching a woman. You are simply coming from the wrong place.
You are looking to take!
If you are looking to take, society says it must be a fair exchange, therefore you must offer her something, which in the pick-up community is in the form of a false gift such as a cool opening line to make her like you, or a super awesome story that makes you look like you have diamonds encrusted on your penis.
This is the trade off; your line delivered in the perfect way in order to convince her to sacrifice her vagina to you, so you can have an orgasm. - Seems kind of greedy!(but hey it's how we have been brainwashed)
THIS is the problem!
If you were to see this woman on the street, what goes through your mind first?
Most likely, the instant internal reaction would be coming from your core masculine and animalistic sexual instinct, such as:
'OH MY GOD LOOK AT HER'
'She is so hot'
'Look at her legs, her skin tone is so fucking stunning'
'She is so beautiful I want to make love to her for hours'
I can pretty much guarantee that you do not feel anxiety whilst looking at her on this computer screen, so why on the street?
Internal Conflict
Ok, so we have established that you have some form of instant attraction towards her, without any fear attached to it.
The 'anxiety' only arises when you mentally decide that you must 'approach' her, and try to get her, or try to convince her to give you her number or go on a date.
Her beauty does not scare you.
You walking over to her does not scare you.
The fact you feel like you must impress this girl and take on specific actions in order to get her attraction is what truly is causing the anxiety internally, which usually stems from a needy unworthiness, or the fact that you must mental flick through 500 eBooks in your head to remember all your stories and techniques. That shit would even stress Einstein out!
This is not coming from the thoughts of her rejecting you, at its core this anxiety is forming due to a build up of internal pressure, which is stemming from internal conflict.
Let me break this down a bit further.
Instinct v Society
Instinctually, at your deepest most natural masculine core, you desire this feminine creature, naturally.
You were bought onto this earth with a penis, you really don't have much say in the matter.
You have been hardwired to desire, feel attraction for and adore the feminine in its most beautiful forms.
Now, in the other corner of this boxing ring(aka your mind) is what society has taught you, the way you were raised, what you have been told is right and wrong, which is to be a super nice and polite guy, and respect women SO much, that you stay completely away from them, you never bother her or be sexual because that is just downright rude and creepy.
FINALLY, throw internal pressure into the mix, and we have an emotional handbrake which will set out to fuck up the chances of you even walking towards her, unless you have some alcohol pumping through your veins.
This pressure is coming from the fact you feel you have a job to do, such as preparing for and entering battle. (let me quickly remind you that the sexy girl you are too afraid to say hi to weighs about 120 pounds)
Right now, I am going to give you an exercise to do for a period of 1-2 weeks. I give this to all my students with a profoundly powerful and life changing impact once started and completed. All you must do, is simply follow it through and apply it.
GUSHING 101
Before I explain this exercise, I want to share with you why it is incredibly powerful. It does many vital things for your belief system, intent, and mindset which will inevitably change the way you interact with women.
1: It removes ALL pressure of you having to attract, seduce, or charm anyone. You have NO job, and NO role. NO fancy lines. NO need to be cool, or impressive. NOTHING! Not even conversation is needed.
2: Rather than approaching looking to take or get something from the woman, you are instead coming from a place of giving without the need for anything in return. You are there to give her a gift which she will accept every single time regardless.
3: There is NO chance of rejection, as you are not looking for anything from her.
So, let's once again look at the picture below.
Now as you look at her, what do you adore about her? What drives your desire and masculine instinct wild? Be specific and quickly study her and jot it down on a piece of paper, or make a mental note....
The first thoughts/feelings that come into your head...THIS is what you verbally express to her.
GUSH over women verbally, looking for NOTHING in return!
There is no right or wrong way to do this....whatever you think/feel...verbalize it to her.
My personal Example of when I see the picture is along the lines of:
"You!! Oh my Fucking god, you're absolutely stunning, your legs, skin, hair, beautiful! who are you?"
Basically I'm verbally shitting without a filter. (realize that this is NOT to be seen as a direct or indirect tool, but instead a process of removing your filter of fear, whilst giving women a beautiful gift)
For the first few week or so of daily interaction, be verbally expressive and learn to GIVE women the gift of your desire. Stop trying to be smooth, cool, and perfect. Stop her in any way you want. There are no rules here, because you are not attempting to pick her up!
Give her the gift of feeling sexy without looking for anything in return.
No number, no date, no sex. Nothing. Trust me, they will be looking for it from you eventually!
So...just so you are clear...
1. see girl
2. gush and blurt out everything you love about her in any way you like
3. either find out more about her, or leave.
THATS IT!
If you are in anyway sceptical about it, I URGE you to do the exercise regardless, just try it, and then make your mind up. I assure you, you will continue, and you will be free, happy, and proud.
It is a few hours of your life, and it will have a profound effect!
Also, it is important to note that women LOVE to be approached by honest authentic men and love to feel sexy and desired. I mean who doesnt like to be appreciated or given a genuine compliment? Think of the last time in your life when someone said something positive about you. It feels awesome, and you enjoy being around that person as they appreciate you.
Imagine being the man who gives people that incredible feeling every day as he moves through the world, without using it to get something in return? Yes, women will want to be around you! Duh!
The powerful result of this exercise is it will give you unapologetic ownership over your desire and the fact you have a cock & balls.
Once you begin to see the positive effect your desire has on the women you encounter, you will enjoy giving women love in every capacity, and guess what, when you love women, women love you!
After this is exercise is completed, you can then begin to draw back verbally and apply the powerful sexually polarizing principles which I teach to gain consistent and even more powerful sexually magnetic interactions.
This is the first and most important step.
Let me know how you go!
Chris