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PostPosted: Tue Oct 14, 2014 1:42 pm 
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Hey guys. I have not been on here in quite a while, nor sharing as much as i would have liked to(coaching con-stop).

I wanted to post this article i wrote with regards to approach anxiety, and the fact that really, it is not a thing. Instead, it is something you have been taught by the large amounts of pick up information out there. Basically, coming from the wrong place.

What im about to share, is what i use with my students/clients with pretty much a 100 percent success rate.

If you apply and understand, you will be much more free to act from the correct and naturally healthy place.

Destroy Approach Anxiety FOREVER - Seriously
-How to Approach & Attract Women From a Sexually Magnetizing Place-


First of all I would like to begin by stating that approach anxiety does not even exist. Basically, I had to use a fancy headline to get you to bother your arse reading it, why?...because most men, will only take the time to take action and do something, if they gain from that action...if they can take value from it, and THIS gentlemen, is why you feel anxiety when you have the intention of approaching a woman. You are simply coming from the wrong place.

You are looking to take!

If you are looking to take, society says it must be a fair exchange, therefore you must offer her something, which in the pick-up community is in the form of a false gift such as a cool opening line to make her like you, or a super awesome story that makes you look like you have diamonds encrusted on your penis.
This is the trade off; your line delivered in the perfect way in order to convince her to sacrifice her vagina to you, so you can have an orgasm. - Seems kind of greedy!(but hey it's how we have been brainwashed)

THIS is the problem!

If you were to see this woman on the street, what goes through your mind first?

Image

Most likely, the instant internal reaction would be coming from your core masculine and animalistic sexual instinct, such as:

'OH MY GOD LOOK AT HER'

'She is so hot'

'Look at her legs, her skin tone is so fucking stunning'

'She is so beautiful I want to make love to her for hours'

I can pretty much guarantee that you do not feel anxiety whilst looking at her on this computer screen, so why on the street?

Internal Conflict

Ok, so we have established that you have some form of instant attraction towards her, without any fear attached to it.

The 'anxiety' only arises when you mentally decide that you must 'approach' her, and try to get her, or try to convince her to give you her number or go on a date.

Her beauty does not scare you.

You walking over to her does not scare you.

The fact you feel like you must impress this girl and take on specific actions in order to get her attraction is what truly is causing the anxiety internally, which usually stems from a needy unworthiness, or the fact that you must mental flick through 500 eBooks in your head to remember all your stories and techniques. That shit would even stress Einstein out!

This is not coming from the thoughts of her rejecting you, at its core this anxiety is forming due to a build up of internal pressure, which is stemming from internal conflict.
Let me break this down a bit further.

Instinct v Society

Instinctually, at your deepest most natural masculine core, you desire this feminine creature, naturally.
You were bought onto this earth with a penis, you really don't have much say in the matter.
You have been hardwired to desire, feel attraction for and adore the feminine in its most beautiful forms.
Now, in the other corner of this boxing ring(aka your mind) is what society has taught you, the way you were raised, what you have been told is right and wrong, which is to be a super nice and polite guy, and respect women SO much, that you stay completely away from them, you never bother her or be sexual because that is just downright rude and creepy.

FINALLY, throw internal pressure into the mix, and we have an emotional handbrake which will set out to fuck up the chances of you even walking towards her, unless you have some alcohol pumping through your veins.
This pressure is coming from the fact you feel you have a job to do, such as preparing for and entering battle. (let me quickly remind you that the sexy girl you are too afraid to say hi to weighs about 120 pounds)
Right now, I am going to give you an exercise to do for a period of 1-2 weeks. I give this to all my students with a profoundly powerful and life changing impact once started and completed. All you must do, is simply follow it through and apply it.

GUSHING 101

Before I explain this exercise, I want to share with you why it is incredibly powerful. It does many vital things for your belief system, intent, and mindset which will inevitably change the way you interact with women.

1: It removes ALL pressure of you having to attract, seduce, or charm anyone. You have NO job, and NO role. NO fancy lines. NO need to be cool, or impressive. NOTHING! Not even conversation is needed.

2: Rather than approaching looking to take or get something from the woman, you are instead coming from a place of giving without the need for anything in return. You are there to give her a gift which she will accept every single time regardless.

3: There is NO chance of rejection, as you are not looking for anything from her.

So, let's once again look at the picture below.

Image

Now as you look at her, what do you adore about her? What drives your desire and masculine instinct wild? Be specific and quickly study her and jot it down on a piece of paper, or make a mental note....
The first thoughts/feelings that come into your head...THIS is what you verbally express to her.
GUSH over women verbally, looking for NOTHING in return!

There is no right or wrong way to do this....whatever you think/feel...verbalize it to her.

My personal Example of when I see the picture is along the lines of:

"You!! Oh my Fucking god, you're absolutely stunning, your legs, skin, hair, beautiful! who are you?"
Basically I'm verbally shitting without a filter. (realize that this is NOT to be seen as a direct or indirect tool, but instead a process of removing your filter of fear, whilst giving women a beautiful gift)

For the first few week or so of daily interaction, be verbally expressive and learn to GIVE women the gift of your desire. Stop trying to be smooth, cool, and perfect. Stop her in any way you want. There are no rules here, because you are not attempting to pick her up!

Give her the gift of feeling sexy without looking for anything in return.
No number, no date, no sex. Nothing. Trust me, they will be looking for it from you eventually!
So...just so you are clear...

1. see girl

2. gush and blurt out everything you love about her in any way you like

3. either find out more about her, or leave.

THATS IT!

If you are in anyway sceptical about it, I URGE you to do the exercise regardless, just try it, and then make your mind up. I assure you, you will continue, and you will be free, happy, and proud.

It is a few hours of your life, and it will have a profound effect!

Also, it is important to note that women LOVE to be approached by honest authentic men and love to feel sexy and desired. I mean who doesnt like to be appreciated or given a genuine compliment? Think of the last time in your life when someone said something positive about you. It feels awesome, and you enjoy being around that person as they appreciate you.

Imagine being the man who gives people that incredible feeling every day as he moves through the world, without using it to get something in return? Yes, women will want to be around you! Duh!

The powerful result of this exercise is it will give you unapologetic ownership over your desire and the fact you have a cock & balls.

Once you begin to see the positive effect your desire has on the women you encounter, you will enjoy giving women love in every capacity, and guess what, when you love women, women love you!

After this is exercise is completed, you can then begin to draw back verbally and apply the powerful sexually polarizing principles which I teach to gain consistent and even more powerful sexually magnetic interactions.

This is the first and most important step.

Let me know how you go!


Chris

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 14, 2014 1:54 pm 
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Thing is though. Context.

Let's say I am at a meeting where a topic X is topic of the day. Say literature, politics, whatever. Then instantly I have an engagement point and will not hesitate to speak to a woman and open up the convo. No matter how beautiful or hot. And this way I easily obtain numbers and emails of very hot women because, face it, I am just a very interesting person to speak with, and they sense my energy and motivation and attune to that.

But then. Most of the time, you will be in a random club with zero points of engagement, other than a poorly cooked up excuse like "do you come here often?"

Now I know it is not about the opening. It is about what comes after the opening. If you speak to two people in a relationship - chances are 99% that neither one of them remembers the openers. But chicks nowadays are so poorly educated culturally/socially that they don't know how to hold a conversation. And you (as guy) end up having to dig miles deep into your coffers to keep coming with funny oneliners that ultimately just seem sought. And this makes me lose interest. They are used to men worshipping them with attention anyway. So they don't need to be able to hold a conversation.

For instance I was in the train the other day with a girl with a chess book. So we had some funny eye contact and then I asked: "So are you a lover of chess?" And I mentioned that I asked this because I assumed female chess players were rare, and could bring up a friend of mine who wrote a book about chess (myself I don't know that much about chess). But basically she said: "No it's just one of my presentations for university". I could of course have followed up with questions as: "What other sports have you done? Why did you choose chess?" But my intuition told me that I would only get pretty blank answers so I left it at that and returned to reading my book.

The thing is, if I had invested asking, hey what do you study? where you go to uni? etc, and making a conversation out of that, with a bit of luck she starting to ask questions too... I would at the end of the day still be dealing with someone who (probably) has no intrinsic drive to do what she's doing. "School made me do this" instead of "I like to play tournaments".

When she got out of the train she said good bye though, and I said good luck with the presentation.

Lack of substance is the overal problem nowadays.


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PostPosted: Tue Oct 14, 2014 2:09 pm 
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Quote:

Let's say I am at a meeting where a topic X is topic of the day. Say literature, politics, whatever. Then instantly I have an engagement point and will not hesitate to speak to a woman and open up the convo. No matter how beautiful or hot.
An engagement point? Why do you feel you need an external engagement point. You naturally ALWAYS have an engagement point...the fact you are a man, she is a woman, and you are attracted to something specific about her. You seem to be looking for an excuse to talk to girls you find attractive so you have CONTENT to speak about.

Content and logical conversation means nothing. It is all about having an emotional impact on her and stimulating her emotions through curiosity and effective questioning to get to the root of who she is.

How awesome you know literature or science or facts has nothing to do with a woman. All it is doing is giving you the excuse, which equals some external confidence, as you may not feel already internally validated by yourself simply being and just showing up with hi.
Quote:
But then. Most of the time, you will be in a random club with zero points of engagement, other than a poorly cooked up excuse like "do you come here often?"
....see above.
Quote:
But chicks nowadays are so poorly educated culturally/socially that they don't know how to hold a conversation. And you (as guy) end up having to dig miles deep into your coffers to keep coming with funny oneliners that ultimately just seem sought. And this makes me lose interest. They are used to men worshipping them with attention anyway. So they don't need to be able to hold a conversation.
This belief you have given yourself holds no basis in reality. Its bullshit and possibly an excuse. I meet many incredibly intelligent women on a regular basis either intellectually or emotionally. Some people are smart, some are not. It is what it is.

When it comes to them holding a conversation, I rarely speak. And when i do its on a few words every now and again. The tension and pressure ALWAYS has the woman doing all the talking and investment.
Quote:
For instance I was in the train the other day with a girl with a chess book. So we had some funny eye contact and then I asked: "So are you a lover of chess?" And I mentioned that I asked this because I assumed female chess players were rare, and could bring up a friend of mine who wrote a book about chess (myself I don't know that much about chess). But basically she said: "No it's just one of my presentations for university". I could of course have followed up with questions as: "What other sports have you done? Why did you choose chess?" But my intuition told me that I would only get pretty blank answers so I left it at that and returned to reading my book.
If you are getting blank answers it is not her fault. It is your questioning. Guys refuse to take responsibilty for being in boring interactions and blame the girl. If you asked her something which emotionally stimulated her enough to invest, then she would of most definitely engaged and invested. This can be done through you challenging also.

Quote:
Lack of substance is the overal problem nowadays.
Opposed to before? This is not the problem! Seriously!

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PostPosted: Thu Oct 16, 2014 1:29 pm 
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OP,

I'm sort of with you. I think not expecting anything and just going up to have a conversation and have fun definitely takes the pressure off, and makes the interaction comfortable and pleasant. I've noticed that by approaching many people with no other motivation than enjoying social interaction has enabled me to generate much attraction in the field. Once you talk to a girl or a group for a while, it becomes obvious when you can and can't escalate.

BUT....

I'm skeptical of the gushing. It seems like it would show too much interest too fast. Example: the girl in the picture is hot. Super hot. But if you 'gush' about how hot she is, doesn't it send the signal that you aren't used to being around hot girls, or aren't comfortable with it in some way? It just doesn't seem like a guy who is used to being around attractive women would make such a big deal out of it like that.

Does that make sense?


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 20, 2014 12:04 am 
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The reality of it is is that each time I approached saying "Oh, you're cute..." and some other shit like that I've crashed and burned.

i have gotten great results by simply changing the way I go about pickup. I shouldn't be trying to flatter her, and if she complements me I won't say anything like that, I'll just say thanks and accept it.

Btw, what do you coach Chris? And I agree that quite a few woment do not know how to hold a conversation. It's pathetic. I actually called one of them out on it and said "I'm sorry, do you know how to do this?" HB siad "Do What?" and I replied with "Hold a conversation?" By me not appearing outcome dependent she apologized profusely and opened up, but it is really pathetic. I'm not even talking about gaming, theres just something wrong with this generation when it comes to conversation.

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 21, 2014 4:01 pm 
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Quote:

I'm skeptical of the gushing. It seems like it would show too much interest too fast. Example: the girl in the picture is hot. Super hot. But if you 'gush' about how hot she is, doesn't it send the signal that you aren't used to being around hot girls, or aren't comfortable with it in some way? It just doesn't seem like a guy who is used to being around attractive women would make such a big deal out of it like that.

Does that make sense?
In terms of how you explained it, sure, it makes sense. But this is the issue...your coming from the wrong place.

Its not what you say, its how you say it.

If we have 2 examples. One guy approaches fast, high energy, jumps in front and blurts out in a high pitched nervous tone "excuse you, i had to stop you, your stunning" - He is moving lots, fidgetting, overwhelmed and overall his vibe is creeping out the girl with just how much he NEEDS this interaction and her response to go favourably.

The second guys, sees the girl, realizes he has nothing to do but show up and be polarizing. With this trust, he calmly and slowly approaches and slowly says in a lowered voice tone and solid eye contact: "excuse me, i saw you...stunning" - He is comfortable...in turn she is comfortable, leading to intrigue and attraction once he implements the very simple principles which i base my teachings around.

You can approach and say ANYTHING you want. Its how and where its stemming from that is the discerning factor. I know this, as i have been at both opposite ends in my life. I can tell you this is pretty much fact.

The reason i encourage gushing is so new guys get comfortable with expressing their sexual desires and attraction for women off the bat. Once this is internalized, seductive refinement and intelligence can be taught...NOT before, as you will always be coming form the incorrect place.

If you go to my blog here: http://www.masculineintent.com/blog/ ...and read the article titled "Stop Chasing Her" it will delve deeply into the process and how to actually deliver a compliment from a powerful place.

Girls here guys tell them they are hot or sexy all the fucking time. It means nothing to them. All it says is "hey, you are sexy enough for me to fuck and who you are as a person doesnt even concern me as i am someone who is willing to take whatever he can get" - This is how compliments are taught to guys. Its fucked up.

Rugby7 - The above article link will directly answer your question also i hope.

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 21, 2014 4:08 pm 
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Quote:
But chicks nowadays are so poorly educated culturally/socially that they don't know how to hold a conversation. And you (as guy) end up having to dig miles deep into your coffers to keep coming with funny oneliners that ultimately just seem sought. And this makes me lose interest. They are used to men worshipping them with attention anyway. So they don't need to be able to hold a conversation.
Wow, that is so not true.

Yes, you meet vapid girls that can only talk about the latest celebrity gossip.

But I meet girls all the time that are ambitious, have hobbies and interests that I share etc.


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PostPosted: Tue Oct 21, 2014 5:07 pm 
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What BreedLove said!!!

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PostPosted: Wed Oct 22, 2014 11:38 pm 
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OP,
Read your blog, and I get where you're coming from a little more now. The gushing is kind of like a rehab step for guys who are so uncomfortable even seeing themselves as sexual beings, or seeing women as such that they need drastic measures.
I'm more on the other end of the spectrum. On your blog you said something like you spend a lot of energy to keep from handing a girl your balls on a silver platter, and that's my prob too. I'm completely comfortable expressing interest, but I always find that doing so, even in a totally casual, non-gushing manner throws the interaction off.

Quick question on a related topic. Cat/string: This is a technique of showing interest a little, then withdrawing. The idea I suppose is to show interest as a reward and withdraw as a punishment. How does this look in play? What kind of behaviors deserve interest, what behaviors require withdrawal. I ask because I find that I show interest too much, like I will be completely interested until I realize the interaction has fallen flat.


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 23, 2014 1:52 am 
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Cool. Yeah that's pretty much what I'm getting at but it's more indepth. If you like I can record a short video on the topic. It's easier to explain that way. If you have any more specific questions on that subject write them below and il get it up in the next day or so.

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PostPosted: Thu Oct 23, 2014 9:31 pm 
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Okay, well...

You mentioned polarization in one (or several) of your blog posts.

I find that when I approach groups or individuals, or just hold conversations, I try to just go with the vibe that already exists. Try to keep things comfortable. This works well for some girls, but the kind I'm really attracted to get bored with comfortable, and frankly I can't blame them.
On the other hand, the few times I've tried to make things uncomfortable, I've done so by expressing my sexual interest (in a subtle and classy way). This always produces less favorable results than just playing it safe. So my question is, how do you create that masculine polarization without 'handing the girl your balls' as you put it.
On a related note, cat string theory. If I approach a girl or a group of girls (or mixed) in a bar or wherever, and I'm getting a good vibe, I'll keep going with it. I feel like I generate a lot of attraction at first, because in my town, not a lot of people go around approaching strangers. Hardly anyone even goes out alone. But eventually, that happy/fun vibe that I bring seems to bore people, especially the edgy, hot girls who would be my targets. So I would want to know how to 'hook' people by withdrawing interest or changing the vibe, without walking away or making the vibe wierd with awkward silences.

Hey, I know you're a busy guy, so I appreciate your attention to this matter.


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PostPosted: Fri Oct 24, 2014 10:58 am 
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That is all quite indepth. I will have a video response up for you asap! Hope it helps!

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PostPosted: Sat Oct 25, 2014 3:37 pm 
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Hey dude,

Heres a deeper explanation and dissection of your Question in Video Form!

Hope you find some benefit from it. My desire is to free as many people from this PUA bull-plop thats so damaging to guys, as it was for me years ago.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HCqIxSw ... lQ&index=1

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PostPosted: Sun Oct 26, 2014 9:11 pm 
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Hey,
Really appreciate that. Just watched it, but I'm going to have to watch it again later because I was thinking about some stuff you said while you were saying other stuff.
I think you analyzed the situation really well, and like I said, I have a lot to think about. The best thing was when you said 'you don't have to be entertaining' because I have a compulsion to try and entertain, like that is where my value comes from, and I need to get rid of that mentality.
Quick question though. You commented on the fact that I said not a lot of people in my town approach strangers, therefore girls recognize it as different/interesting, so it builds attraction. You said that is part of a persona I'm building up that will eventually crash. Are you suggesting that I not approach people randomly?
Because I have fun meeting new people that way and I would probably do it even if I knew nothing sexual would result.


PS: This week I was feeling kind of down, so I didn't really try to 'game' anyone, just did and said what I felt like. And I noticed I got more satisfying connections than normal. So I know the truth of what you are saying in the video. Thanks again.


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 26, 2014 11:47 pm 
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Quote:
Hey,
Really appreciate that. Just watched it, but I'm going to have to watch it again later because I was thinking about some stuff you said while you were saying other stuff.
I think you analyzed the situation really well, and like I said, I have a lot to think about. The best thing was when you said 'you don't have to be entertaining' because I have a compulsion to try and entertain, like that is where my value comes from, and I need to get rid of that mentality.
Quick question though. You commented on the fact that I said not a lot of people in my town approach strangers, therefore girls recognize it as different/interesting, so it builds attraction. You said that is part of a persona I'm building up that will eventually crash. Are you suggesting that I not approach people randomly?
Because I have fun meeting new people that way and I would probably do it even if I knew nothing sexual would result.


PS: This week I was feeling kind of down, so I didn't really try to 'game' anyone, just did and said what I felt like. And I noticed I got more satisfying connections than normal. So I know the truth of what you are saying in the video. Thanks again.
With regards to your question about approaching strangers, i am not saying to stop. KEEP approaching strangers. Just make sure you do not use the fact that you approach to make yourself stand out. Its an ego thing, and anything attached to the ego will eventually crash. i know this because it happened to me when i started out first. I felt so cool i was being direct. But really, the fact you approach doesnt make you attractive, you are ALREADY attractive, good enough and worthy. You can do anything you want. Because if you ever stopped approaching you would beat yourself up. You are already awesome regardless, realize this.

You do NOT need to entertain! (im writing all this after 12 hours of coaching so hopefully i am making sense )

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