My GF loves to play these, and early on I responded to them in a somewhat jealous beta manner. With the help of this site and a few other people, I've grown less jealous and more secure and in turn reacted in the proper alpha manner whenever they have come up recently (at least I think it was the proper manner).
Last night at dinner her and I were casually talking about past relationships and she mentioned how with the exception of her ex husband, her exes had always contacted her at some point after they had broken up. I chimed in, stating that an ex of mine recently texted me saying how she missed me. I didn't reply back to her, which is what I told my GF when she asked me how I responded.
Anyway, I could kinda pick up that this made her a little jealous...maybe not jealous, but aware. It got her attention. So today when she was at work, she texted me that this old black man gave her flowers at work "because she is beautiful". The fact that this was premeditated on the guys part seemed a bit creepy and I told her that. But I then told her that he had good taste. She said that this wasn't the first time that stuff like this had happened (not from the same guy, just in general).
She replied with "next time should I get his number?" To which I replied with "you mean you didn't already? If not, sure
"
To which she replied "I already blew him in the bathroom", followed by me responding with "oh, well that's ok then"
Obviously we were joking about it. And in this case, being that it was an old man there would be no reason to be jealous. But she has brought stuff like this up in the past, telling me how random guys or guys at work have hit on her, no doubt to try and get a rise out of me and to try and make me jealous.
I don't really like hearing them, but by the same token I don't wanna let on that they have any impact on my frame at all. And they bother me much less than they did in the past, and I am getting more secure as time goes on and our relationship continues to grow. In the above instance, I think I handled it pretty well. Correct me if I'm wrong.
I guess my question is why does she keep playing these? If I give off the proper response, conveying that they have no impact on my frame no matter what, should would stop over time I assume correct? Could the reason be that she is really insecure and feels the need to try and validate herself by telling me these things?
I guess I just don't see why girls (or guys) for that matter do stupid jealousy tests like this, at least not for any extended period of time. Seem silly.
Thoughts?