Quote:
Quote:
I texted
the girl from last night but she didn't reply. I blame myself, I asked her,
Hey, how was work today?
The thing about this text is that it's fucking boring and makes me look like every other chode in existence. It does nothing to reinforce the idea that I'm the cool guy that she's been looking for. So I'm going to strike this text from the face of the planet and only do more interesting follow up texts.
Hey man, Once again love your posts and enjoy reading about the growth you are experiencing.
One item I've been experimenting with is generic texts myself.
TBH, I'm starting to think generic texts are ok. They are kind of like those Nigerian Prince emails. Only people really interested will respond back. It's possible with a killer text she would have texted back, but it's better to work on a person already attracted to you then try to push someone into the attraction area only to flake later on. I have found if a girl is genuinely attracted to you, you can text her the recipe of cereal and she'll text you back.
I've been working on making pick up as effortless and natural as possible. I was working really hard and made lots of investments and trying too hard and decided to just let it flow and keep it as natural as possible, but also keeping a focus on the process of approach, leading, general frame of mind, etc and it's been working- I'm obviously nowhere near a pro or advanced as you are, but I've seen some growth.
I was also glad to hear that you are continuing to talk to the girl from Halloween, I think you would increase your pull exponentially if you move a little over to the camp of those doing day2's and day3's, but I understand NYC, where people are constantly traveling or not one spot for more than a couple of nights.
Looking forward to reading more posts. ttyl
Hey man,
A few thoughts. I 90% agree with what you said about generic texts being OK. If the girl likes you then she will text back. That being said, there are a couple of abused, cliched texts that are just fucking stupid that I wish to totally get rid of. How was work? How's your day going? Etc. These are things that I would text my girlfriend, not a girl I want to hook up with. I think that I can be a little bit more creative.
In regards to the day 2or 3, for me it really comes down to motivation. To go on a date instead of go out and cold approach 20 chicks, that girl has to be cute! So that Halloween girl, I'm going to the bar with her tonight which is perfect. I either pull her, or I'm already at the bar and I just start hitting on all the other girls
I know exactly what you mean about investing a lot and trying too hard with pickup. I went through this stage about 6 months into my journey. I was obsessed with improvement, scared I'd never get better, and thought that if I didn't pull that week I was a total and utter failure. Ironically, the very fucking day I dropped all that and just decided to have fun is the day I pulled after a long dry spell. So like you said, try to make it more effortless. Go out to have fun, do the things that make the night the most enjoyable and productive, then let the chips fall where they may. That's so much better than stressing out and becoming obsessed with outcomes.
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Friday night in New York, people everywhere. Get denied from a bar because I have a penis. Make accusations of sexism, vow to never return. Go to a different bar that turns out to be better anyways. Open, open, open. Wingman shows up but he's not in a good state. Refuses to approach, bitches out and goes home. Not cool you English tea drinker, you've got some work to do.
Alone, I open, open, open. Another wingman shows up. He's on fire, pulling every week, putting the rest of us to shame. We open, open, open. I see this cute little Asian girl and it's so obvious that her buying temperature is plus 100. She's too short to kiss without some awkwardness. I pick her up, bring her face to mine, we make out. That's a first, have to remember to do it again. I pull her outside. We makeout but it's cold. She's shivering. I hug her. Another girl joins the hug. Then her friend. Three of us hugging this tiny little girl.
At this point I'm owning. If I had logistics I would have thrown this Asian girl into the first taxi I saw and pulled her to mine. I would have had to deal with numerous objections but it would have been fine. Unfortunately, no logistics. We makeout one last time, I get her number then release her back into the wild.
More opening till I find Lea. Super cute, great hair, fun personality. Stay with her an hour. Pull her and her friend to another bar. Friend is not having fun, I'm praying that she'll leave me and Lea alone. This is a solid pull if only the friend leaves. Naturally, friend does not leave. Instead, insists Lea take her home. I say,
"Ok, well let's grab an Uber, take her home then check out a bar on the Upper East Side."
Lea says no, says she's staying that night with her friend who is new to the city. She asks me for my number, says she'd like to hang out again. I give it to her, we have a goodbye-makeout then off she goes. I open a few more sets, few more girls on the sidewalk, nothing special. Go home and get 4 hours of sleep before work.
The Breakdown
*I'm happy with how I handled the night. With Lea, my most promising set, I'm honestly not sure what I would change. Without a wingman to handle the friend I'm in a tight spot. As much as I'd love to, I can't just tell the friend to go home. I was really counting on her just getting bored and leaving, but that didn't happen. Anyone have ideas about what to do here?
*Last night, for a few minutes, was perhaps the most in state I've ever been. It felt like cocaine without the cocaine. I was standing in the center of an aggressively loud bar, walled in by people, feeling beautifully relaxed and natural. It was really spectacular, it even lead to some girls opening me. Something that hasn't happened to me in months. While this state is great, I'm coming to depend on it less and less. Regardless of how I feel I can hammer out my approaches and make shit happen.
*My outings are taking on a new level. I'm routinely making out with two women a night and it seems obvious that soon I'll make out with three, something I've never done before. Pickup is glorious, there's nothing else to say.
*As fucking solid as my set with Lea was, and even though she said she'd really like to see me and asked me for my number, I know that there's a not-so-low chance I'll never see her again. It boggles my mind. What the hell are these girls looking for? Does she really meet a guy as cool as me, who she has so much in common with, every weekend? Does hypergamy really just not give a shit, it's the best or nothing? Game is sort of ruthless. I'm willing to accept that though, I'm learning what the reality actually is and figuring out how to win. That being said, I'd be really cool to hook up with Lea.