Kicking Ass and Taking Names in NYC


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PostPosted: Thu Aug 31, 2017 5:28 pm 
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Went out solo last night. I almost always run into someone at the Wednesday spot but none of my wingmen were there last night. I sat down next to a cute blonde girl but she was married. I walked around until I heard a girl speaking German. I started talking to her, she invited me back to her table where she had some friends. That's how I spent the rest of the night. We spoke a bunch of German, vibed, had a good time. I stayed with the group for two hours then left the club. A couple of lessons.

Notes

*There were two German girls. One was with a guy, one was single. I had two windows in which to kiss my German girl and I passed on both of them. Since the vibe was mostly friendly the whole night I was thinking that I could just roll with that and kiss her later. But it didn't work like that. After I missed the second window to kiss her she withdrew all attention from me and I was done. Interesting. I don't know how the fuck guys maintain platonic relationships with women, that rarely seems to work out for me.

*I had the limiting belief that I couldn't pull my German girl because she's a foreigner and staying with some guy on his couch. Generally, yes. Foreign girls will be less likely to split off from the group. However, this one was crazy and wanted to get laid. I could have absolutely gone for the pull. Big lesson here is to push for it and then calibrate after. Never assume that I know what's up. Fuck limiting beliefs, they hold me back.

*These two German girls were freaky. I think that if one of them wasn't marginally with a guy it could have easily turned into a threesome. I had a really solid vibe with the two of them and I could have led that to the bedroom.

*I literally fucking say this every other field report but I have to be going for the kiss. I have to power through whatever bullshit is happening in my head and just make it happen.

*A pickup guy I follow made a really good point: in order to become comfortable talking to the high quality women you have to spend as much time as possible talking to them. It seems so obvious but I hadn't really put that piece together yet. So it's like this, when I was first starting I had to continually challenge myself to stay in set and not bounce. At this point I have that down. Now I need to challenge myself to stay in set *with the cutest girls*. Before too long it's going to reach the point where I can pull 2 or 3 average girls a week and that will be cool as hell. However, I'm really thinking bigger picture. I want amazing women in my life.

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 01, 2017 4:42 pm 
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Pickup is fun! Last night was glorious. I had some drinks then met up with my wingman. First club sucked so we went to my favorite place in NYC. Upstairs met up with my natural friend and we started opening everything. Found some Canadians. He started making out with his, I pulled mine off the couch and started making out with her. He left and I danced some with my girl. She said she had to use the bathroom so I took her there. Pulled her into a stall but she was not down for anything. I left, never saw her again.

Met up with my buddy, same thing happened to him. Pulled his Canadian girl to a stall but nothing happened. Left the club, bounced all around. Ended up with this super cute girl sitting on some steps outside a club. Talked to her for 20 minutes maybe. I was hoping my buddy would leave us alone, I thought there was some chance I could have pulled her to my place. We were a block from my building. I invited her over for some drinks but she declined.

After a while I was done talking. It was almost 3. Eventful night. I'm looking forward to the coming months when I think I'm going to start pulling an awful lot. My inner game is fairly fucking solid, I'm going to pull more as I figure out some outergame stuff. How to deal with objections, how to isolate better, how to lead more effectively, etc.

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PostPosted: Sat Sep 02, 2017 5:21 pm 
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I'm mentally exhausted from pickup. My голова doesn't know what to make of it all. Went out last night and ran into everyone. Leaving the first bar I bumped into a wingman and we bounced to another bar. Opened a bit then we separated. Collided with another wingman who I almost got an apartment with. We opened for half an hour then it broke up. Another wingman showed up but I was talking to a cute girl so he bounced. Didn't see him again. Standing outside the bar I saw my natural friend. I've been out with him the last two nights, tearing shit up. I shouted him over and we spent the rest of the night opening everything. This guy is one of the few people I've ever met who opens more than me, he's an animal. Stayed out till 2:30 then called it a night.

Notes

*Social calibration is overrated. My natural buddy seems to ignore most social conventions and he told me that he's slept with 40 or 50 women this year. However, he ignores social conventions in a productive way. He said to me,

"Man, I've fucked so many girls this year that I just don't give a fuck. I'm crazy, I'll do anything! I give a fuck if she leaves."

*I got sucked in by my friend last night and I wasn't acting like my normal self. I used to be a weird little dude who over analyzed the living fuck out of social situations in a really creepy way. I don't do that anymore but I am aware that I need to find a way to keep my level of awesome up, even when I'm with a dominant guy. I think that comes down to opening my own sets and being more independent. By the end of the night he was opening 90% of the sets and he had the momentum.

*Although my friend blows me out of the water when it comes to sleeping with women, he did say that I'm better than him at keeping a conversation going. He says he runs out of stuff to say sometimes. That was cool to hear, given that when I started this was a problem for me as well. I've come a long way.

*We did try to stop several groups of models. They were not having it. I was not having it, my brain had shut down 45 minutes ago. Nobody was having anything.

*Best part of the night was the 15 or 20 minutes I spent talking to this really cute girl. It was great, there were 2 or 3 times I could feel this weird feeling of self-sabotage rising. That little voice that wants me to say something totally stupid and act weird to fuck it up. I squashed that bitch. I asked for her number and she said no but that's OK. I was really just looking that I asked, I can't control the response.

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PostPosted: Mon Sep 04, 2017 9:45 pm 
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The best part of last night was one particularly difficult set. I saw an unusually cute girl dancing. Guy or two, girl or two with her. Whatever, I go in and do my best conceivable approach. I can immediately feel the pressure of 4 people focusing on me. It's epic. I say nonsensical things to this girl, I recognize that at this moment my actual words account for 2% of my success. 98% depends on how I comport myself. I own the pressure as best as I possible can until her friend blocks me off. Then she turns around and physically shoves me away. I refuse to leave, I'm not talking to the girl, I'm not bugging anyone, I'm just standing there. But I won't move. The guy starts to get involved, I ignore him. The girl tries to get me to leave again, I won't budge. The social pressure was epic. I got the largest rush that I've had in a while.

Moments like this are good because I can feel myself becoming less reactive. If I can withstand this kind of social pressure, the regular stuff is a breeze by comparison. Just like a guy who's benching 300lb would think it's a joke to do 135. Other than that crazy set, the usual. Met up with a cool new wingman, we worked our way through LES and opened a bunch of sets. A few things worth talking about.

Notes

*My first six sets or so I was mimicking attractive behavior. I was trying to consciously control all my mannerisms to conform to my general idea of what women find attractive. Cocky, funny, breaking report, silly, having fun, etc. But damn, those girls don't fall for it for a second. I hardly had 2 minutes of talking time with six sets combined. Then I dropped the act. I walked up to a cute Asian girl and started asking her some regular questions. No cocky funny, no acting, no over-the-top bullshit. We talked for quite a while and at the end, when I asked for her number, she said she had a boyfriend but she thought I was awesome.

Man, this is a bit of a mind fuck for me. I've consciously or unconsciously associated this outgoing, player persona with getting laid. However, last night it wasn't working and the fucking second, the very god damn second, that I dropped it was the moment I had a great interaction and the girl really liked me. Honest expression is not flashy but it's better game. I'm not being the craziest guy in the room, but I'm communicating a lot of value by doing a good approach, having good eye contact, being 100% comfortable, engaging the friends, creating an interesting conversation, etc. That flashy bullshit stuff is sort of fun and it looks cool but the results are poor.

*Yesterday at work I saw an exceptionally beautiful girl. I was instantly pissed at her. God fucking dammit, how is life fair. She's just born like that and here I am busting my fucking ass, putting in hundreds of hours of effort and still not even hooking up with a girl this cute. Fucking life. I was in a negative headspace yesterday and I knew it. When I'm in a regular or good headspace I don't think like that. I realize that game is teaching me awesome lessons and I also usually feel fucking amazing when I go out. In fact there are nights where I pull, have sex and then think, damn. That orgasm didn't feel as good as that 7 minute rampage I went on.

I'm striving to cultivate an amazing inner environment where I'm consistently in a good mood and I'm not seeking external validation. Once I have that environment I will not be chasing girls, they will be coming to me. It's like my Dad's plan. He has 100 acres of property and he likes to go deer hunting. Instead of going all over trying to find a single deer, he planted a bunch of apple trees and created an environment that attracts the deer. Now he has more than he and ten friends could ever want. No chasing, the deer come to them. That's what I'm trying to do with girls. My headspace has to eventually reach the point where I'm no longer chasing, girls are the one fighting to be with me.

*Girls want you to be attractive, they want you to be cool, they want you to succeed and everyone to get laid. I talk to my sister a lot about guys and I see it from her perspective. She has certain standards and will shoot guys down, but she's also very willing to accept dorky behavior, stupid mistakes, awkward bullshit, whatever. She's not trying to destroy guys. Girls at the bar may test us to find out what we're made of but deep down they want us to succeed.

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PostPosted: Wed Sep 06, 2017 10:28 am 
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I'm a long time lurker, just recently became a member. Just wanted to sincerely thank you for your posts. Great insights, interesting writing in general.

Two things that recently stood out, you mentioned the idea of limiting beliefs. I understand, society in general is programmed to have some type of expectations -sort of like schemas (it helps us kind of be able to organize and predict outcomes and behavior). And while in our mind, we have a governor put the brakes on what's possible, it reality there are no brakes and everything is possible. Your insight really helped my game, because it really shined the light on the idea that the possibilities are endless and people (both me and girls) are capable of doing much more than they ever expected of themselves when gently pushed the right way.

I also liked your last paragraph about girls wanting you to succeed. I agree 100%. I believe this fact is one of main sources of positive energy. I'm going to keep this idea in the back of my head on every approach I do going forward. Both guys and girls are at the clubs and bars to meet people, have a good time and make connections. On a deep level it's all positive energy.

Don't mind my rambling. I look forward to your posts and there's an open invitation to Prague (where I am based) if you travel to Europe.


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 06, 2017 8:24 pm 
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UncleFreddy wrote:
I'm a long time lurker, just recently became a member. Just wanted to sincerely thank you for your posts. Great insights, interesting writing in general.

Two things that recently stood out, you mentioned the idea of limiting beliefs. I understand, society in general is programmed to have some type of expectations -sort of like schemas (it helps us kind of be able to organize and predict outcomes and behavior). And while in our mind, we have a governor put the brakes on what's possible, it reality there are no brakes and everything is possible. Your insight really helped my game, because it really shined the light on the idea that the possibilities are endless and people (both me and girls) are capable of doing much more than they ever expected of themselves when gently pushed the right way.

I also liked your last paragraph about girls wanting you to succeed. I agree 100%. I believe this fact is one of main sources of positive energy. I'm going to keep this idea in the back of my head on every approach I do going forward. Both guys and girls are at the clubs and bars to meet people, have a good time and make connections. On a deep level it's all positive energy.

Don't mind my rambling. I look forward to your posts and there's an open invitation to Prague (where I am based) if you travel to Europe.


Hey man, I would love to go out in Prague! Best beer I ever had in Europe was there, it's a wicked cool city. I plan on being in Europe sometime next year, I'll let you know.

I'm glad you like the writing, I try to keep it engaging. Limiting beliefs suck man! They hold us back so much and they're also very difficult to see. A certain part of game is pushing the envelope as far as possible to see what's really possible. It's difficult because we don't like to change but it's absolutely necessary to get good.


----

I've talked before about these brief glimpses of game at the next level. It's these moments where I'm talking to the girl but I'm no longer chasing. I'm not trying to lead it towards sex. I'm just there, talking, being myself. The funniest thing is that when it happens it feels scary. It's so different from the way I've spent 99.998% of my life interacting with girls. I first started noticing this last month but it seems to be happening a bit more now. All I can say is cool, I'm looking forward to the shift. It might take another year to fully get there and that's OK. Once I do my options with women will blow up.

I'm really interested in talking to the most attractive women. I want to be consistently approaching them, reapproaching them, staying in set under pressure and in general doing whatever possible to speak with them as long as possible. In a way I think that going after hotter women may actually be easier. I'm more attracted and more willing to endure bullshit, fight through pressure, reapproach multiple times, etc. As opposed to another average girl who I might blow off as soon as things get tricky.

A theory, women respond well to good looking guys not just because of the physical looks, but because she associates good looking guys with game. That is, the two usually go together. She may give a good looking guy the benefit of the doubt, whereas a less unattractive guy has to do more to prove himself because she isn't inclined to believe he's got attractive qualities.

I'm still really interested in the idea of entitlement. Yesterday at work an exceptionally tall, skinny blonde girl sat down close to me. I'm about 84% sure she sat there because she wanted me to talk to her. We had exchanged glances earlier. I never talked to her. My thought process is something like, there's no way it will happen. I've never slept with a girl I met in the day. I can't make this happen. Contrast that to Ukraine, where we rolled up on stunning women all the time and it was easy and fun. Of course I would have opened her there, I felt entitled!

In Ukraine, as an American, you're wealthy, you can afford to eat anywhere and do anything, you have great status. My game in Ukraine was the same, the only thing that changed was entitlement. However, that simple change allowed me to thoughtlessly roll up on great looking women all day. Whereas in NYC I feel like a small, broke fish and I don't feel entitled. Interesting. However, I know this can be overcome. Distant Light was fucking 20, broke, living with his parents and he still made it happen with models all the time. It's possible.

The Night

Ended up with three different wingman, we opened some chicks. It was fun. I've reached the point where I have a group of really fucking solid wingman who go out a lot, approach a lot and are effective with women. It's great, especially compared to some of the bozos I went out with when I started. And they want to hang out with me, we all offer value to each other. Don't try to attract the people you want in your life. Instead, become the type of person you want to attract and then they'll come to you.

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PostPosted: Sat Sep 09, 2017 4:38 pm 
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Went out to a bar in the East Village with my friend. Had a few beers, talked to some girls and ended up with Monica. Really cute, super tall! We ended up making out and it was good. Tried valiantly for the pull but it wasn't happening. In retrospect I would change my behavior. We were outside waiting for the Uber and it was fairly clear she wasn't going to let me go home with her. I kept aggressively pushing for it, but I should have backed off and started planning a date. I would definitely go out with this girl again.

The whole time I was with her I was trying to not chase, I was trying to just "be" for lack of a better word. And it's funny because you can't get to this state by trying, it's the opposite of trying. But I don't know a better way to go about it. Continually remind myself that I'm the prize, that sex is guaranteed, that I shouldn't chase. My results may actually go down as I figure this the fuck out, maybe. But long term it's going to be massive.

The parallels between poker and pickup are massive. In both cases you can do everything right and lose, or do everything wrong and win. Both teach you that you must focus on the action, you cannot worry about the result.

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PostPosted: Tue Sep 12, 2017 3:46 pm 
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Only able to find a couple of sets last night. A common complaint of mine that NYC nightlife is disappointing. Stupid but we still had fun. Every time I go out I'm trying to drop expectations and have fun with the girl. No prerogative, instead I'm putting faith in the fact that we will hook up, even if I don't chase. It's weird because it's so different from how I've spent my entire life with girls. I still don't really understand it.

On a practical note, it would pay to start getting into some higher end venues. I know it's possible, I've just been lazy about it and also it usually means going solo because my wingmen can't get in. Regardless, it would be nice for maybe a Thursday or something.

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PostPosted: Wed Sep 13, 2017 5:03 pm 
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I hit up a different Tuesday spot than normal. My buddy was supposed to be promoting but he never showed up. I was solo which is rare. It took me a long time to work up the nerve to do my first approach. Did it and I was shut out in 4 seconds flat. I saw an exceptionally cute girl walking by and I started to follow her. She went to the bar, it was crowded, I didn't try to open. Another 15 minutes of nothing, until I say to myself, fuck this man. If you don't make something happen, what's the point of even going out? I see that same cute girl again, approach her and we talk for 5 minutes. One thing that helped me a lot was a post I recently read about invisible attraction.

Invisible attraction = The hotter girls will give you very few, if any, signs that they're into you. They might give you one word answers, act bored, not try to keep the conversation going, etc. However, it's a front. On the inside they're actually attracted but they won't let you see that. So you have to power through and trust that she's attracted.

That was this girl. She was giving me nothing, I kept pushing. We broke off and I danced for a minute. Then I saw her sitting down alone. I sat next to her. She insulted me for 2 minutes, I shrugged it off, then we started talking about food. Ten minutes later we left together to get pizza. Then I walked her home. Then I asked to use the bathroom and we went inside. We ended up kissing but nothing else. She had to wake up in six hours for a thesis meeting and she said no way I could stay over.

Now...... Did I blow everything by not pushing harder for sex? I hope not, this would be, hands down, the cutest girl I've hooked up with yet. My thinking at the moment was this, going all the way for sex at this moment is high risk, high reward. Maybe I can push past her objections and get laid. But only maybe. There's also a good chance I can't, and then I've blown the cool and I'll probably never see her again. Instead of doing that I got her number and set up a date for this Friday. Typically when I push the interaction as far as conceivably possible, then set up a date for later, those dates tend to go very well. So I'll text her today and see what happens. I'm fully open to the idea that I fucked up by not trying harder for sex. She let me into her house after all.

Notes

*I've been talking a lot about this idea of outcome independent game. A state of mind where I'm not chasing, I'm assuming it's on. That was last night. I spent 90 minutes talking to this girl and I never tried anything, it was all very platonic. I just assumed it was on. Then we got back to her place and started kissing. If she didn't have a thesis thing there's a good chance we would have hooked up. It's just being cool, being normal and assuming attraction. And I'm only in the nascent stages of understanding this, I've got years ahead of me to really master it. But I'm so psyched for that.

*The other great thing about this "non-chasing" game is that it's so much more in line with my personality. I'm the same person when I'm in set with a girl as I am with anyone else. It's a great alignment, as opposed to adopting a new persona when in set. This is not cool. The example I always think of is this PUA I went out with last winter. He was technically exceptionally skilled but also weird. His entire personality changed when he was with a girl versus chatting with me. He had all but mastered the art of "chasing" game but he had yet to progress past that point. I don't want to be like that.

*Finding the best pickup information takes work. It means sorting through a lot of fucking bullshit and marketing half truths to find the gold. Even someone like Distant Light who I model myself on, you still have to filter his content.

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PostPosted: Thu Sep 14, 2017 6:10 pm 
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First girl I talked to I ended up staying with the whole night. I didn't end up pulling. A guy friend showed up and her cousin, who she's living with (and is a manager at my favorite club in NYC), took one look at me and made the guy friend promise to get the girl on the train and home safe. My question: is this all just more bullshit? If I had led harder could I have gotten around the logistics and pulled anyways? I have so many questions about last night, I would pay $50 to see how an advanced guy would have handled it.

On a positive note, I set up a date to get some wine. I think maybe that will happen. I also texted the girl from last night and we had a brief conversation but it didn't go anywhere (posted a picture of that text convo here). My texting game only seems to work when the girl is so into me that it doesn't matter what I say. In retrospect I should have pushed harder for sex. We were there, it was on, fuck it. I let beliefs about what is and is not possible limit me. The more I go out the more these beliefs dissolve, but I still have a long way to go.

Tonight I may have taken the not chasing idea too far. I think that about an hour deep with my girl I needed to kiss her. However, I always go for the kiss. So in a way I'm fine that I didn't push for it because I'm trying new things. And maybe it works out that tomorrow we go for wine, go back to my place to "see if the wine is good" and then we hook up. Maybe that happens, maybe it doesn't, I don't know.

This mindset of assuming attraction and being the prize, it feels really good and so far the results are good. I still have about a billion questions but that's nothing new. I'll go out a lot, talk to a shit ton of girls and start figuring things out. One strong change that I can make is leading harder and getting the girl out of the club. No seeding the pull, no bullshit, just grab her hand, say adventure, let's go! And get her out. Deal with objections as they come up.

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PostPosted: Sat Sep 16, 2017 6:31 pm 
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The cute girl I pulled home but didn't close on Monday, never met up with her again. Painful lesson to learn man. I had the opportunity, I was at her place and let it slip past. I can think of two things I messed up. First, she kept saying you can't sleep over. I interpreted that to mean no sex but I think it meant we can hook up but you have to leave afterwards. Next time that happens I'll say yeah, I won't sleep over and then get on with it. Second thing, right before I kissed her she said,

"I like total honesty, were you thinking about having sex tonight?"

Taken aback, I replied, "Yeah, I was."

There are definitely times when sex is so obviously on the table that it's no big deal. But in this context I think it would be better if I had said something more "gamey" like no, I really hadn't thought about it or whatever.

So the big lesson here is go for it then and there. It seems sort of sexually aggressive but it's necessary. It's also a win-win for both of us. Obviously this doesn't mean ignore real objections, but it does mean I shouldn't have rolled over as easily as I did.

Thursday

Girl from Wednesday night, ending up meeting up Thursday and hanging out for five hours. Got some sushi, drank some wine, hit some bars but nothing happened. It turned out we had no real chemistry and I didn't try anything. I'm OK with that though because I have the opposite of a friend-zone problem with girls, I hardly fucking ever have a platonic relationship with a girl. It's literally happened one time in the fifteen months I've been in NYC.

Will I see this girl again? I think not, mostly because of the personality. There was lack of romantic interest and just lack of interest in general.

Friday

Really wasn't feeling like going out so I went out. Met up with my wingman and we opened some sets. Went pretty well with one girl and learned a good lesson. We were in this crazy environment, getting buffeted around like popcorn. What I needed to do was get us anchored against the wall, her leaning into me. That would have been the move.

This girl had horrible eye contact which throws me off. Her sub-communication kept saying that she liked me but she wouldn't look me in the eye. Maybe just nervous or intimidated? In the future I need to point out that I like good eye contact, bad eye contact is a turn off.

Got her number then we bounced around LES some more. Nothing too crazy happened. Five nights in a row of going out, it's been really good. Had a couple of near misses but even though I didn't get laid, it's been cool to just spend so many hours interacting with women.

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PostPosted: Sun Sep 17, 2017 10:57 pm 
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Davai wrote:
First girl I talked to I ended up staying with the whole night. I didn't end up pulling. A guy friend showed up and her cousin, who she's living with (and is a manager at my favorite club in NYC), took one look at me and made the guy friend promise to get the girl on the train and home safe. My question: is this all just more bullshit? If I had led harder could I have gotten around the logistics and pulled anyways? I have so many questions about last night, I would pay $50 to see how an advanced guy would have handled it.

On a positive note, I set up a date to get some wine. I think maybe that will happen. I also texted the girl from last night and we had a brief conversation but it didn't go anywhere (posted a picture of that text convo here). My texting game only seems to work when the girl is so into me that it doesn't matter what I say. In retrospect I should have pushed harder for sex. We were there, it was on, fuck it. I let beliefs about what is and is not possible limit me. The more I go out the more these beliefs dissolve, but I still have a long way to go.

Tonight I may have taken the not chasing idea too far. I think that about an hour deep with my girl I needed to kiss her. However, I always go for the kiss. So in a way I'm fine that I didn't push for it because I'm trying new things. And maybe it works out that tomorrow we go for wine, go back to my place to "see if the wine is good" and then we hook up. Maybe that happens, maybe it doesn't, I don't know.

This mindset of assuming attraction and being the prize, it feels really good and so far the results are good. I still have about a billion questions but that's nothing new. I'll go out a lot, talk to a shit ton of girls and start figuring things out. One strong change that I can make is leading harder and getting the girl out of the club. No seeding the pull, no bullshit, just grab her hand, say adventure, let's go! And get her out. Deal with objections as they come up.




I kinda get the feeling that you needed to warm the girl up from the text convo. I think we (PUA's) sometimes forget how much women's emotions fluctuate, especially in a night time setting. It's obvious that a lot of the emotions weren't there during the text, so throwing out the idea of going out actually repelled rather than attracted, I think.


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PostPosted: Thu Sep 21, 2017 5:28 pm 
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ChocolatePUA wrote:

I kinda get the feeling that you needed to warm the girl up from the text convo. I think we (PUA's) sometimes forget how much women's emotions fluctuate, especially in a night time setting. It's obvious that a lot of the emotions weren't there during the text, so throwing out the idea of going out actually repelled rather than attracted, I think.


Warm her up, yes. But how exactly? Ask her how her day is? Send her a funny meme? Make a joke? Ignore her? Send a short, bland message? Send her a picture of my dick haha..

I mean I just don't know what the fuck I'm doing with texting. But I'm really focused on night game and SNLs right now, so it's not a huge deal. When I figure out the texting problem I'm going to go all in. Nothing but day game, getting multiple numbers, multiple dates and reading / watching everything about it possible. Until then I'll accept that I'll lose some.

--------------

Here's how it went. Showed up at the club, walked around and didn't see my wingmen. Opened a girl and ended up staying with her for twenty or thirty minutes. I was in a sweet zone of not chasing and she started investing into me. A lot. The less I talked, the more I held strong eye contact, the more and more she qualified herself. This is what I'm working towards! I see brief glimpses of it sometimes but last night was an excellent example of the potential.

She had a boyfriend and she ended up leaving, but I think that with a few simple tweaks I could have kissed her. At one point there was so much sexual tension in the air you could have bottled it and solid it to virgins in India. However, I diffused it by trying to kiss her at the wrong moment. Next time I'm going to let this tension build as high as it will fucking go.

There was another cute girl, later on, and I saw some signs from her so I went for the makeout after three minutes. Wrong move, basically blew the set. I'm really happy that I went for it though, I'd always rather risk it then not go for it and feel shitty.

I can say that my biggest sticking point at the moment is understanding sexual pressure, windows, and when to go for the makeout. There are times I lose sets because I don't kiss her and she wants to get sexual. So she finds another guy who will pull the trigger. Other times I lose it by being too hasty. I've been honing in on this for months and I still feel like I'm tying my shoe laces, I haven't even stepped on the court yet.

Notes

*Investment based game where she's doing the talking and chasing me isn't flashy. I'm not saying witty things, cracking jokes, doing a bunch of polarizing statements or whatever. So it's basically opposite of all that "cool" stuff you see in pickup videos. But it's effective! And it's the point I'm aiming towards because it's real game. The girl, chasing me, getting so invested in me that she doesn't want to leave. Taking this to a high level is going to be powerful.

*To make this happen I think that one thing I can do is go into set high energy and get the ball rolling the first few minutes. Then I start to back off and let her keep it rolling.

*Last night, for about forty-five minutes, I felt like I was expressing myself in a very congruent manner. My words were clear and on point. Then that faded and I could feel myself slip back into a sub-par place. My words felt cloudy and metallic. It's interesting to notice it though. You can't really notice it if you have no comparison, but once you've been in that sweet spot you can recognize when you slip out. I trust that in the future I'll spend more time authentically expressing myself and the results will be better because of it.

*At this point a major reason that I'm going out and putting all this time into pickup is because I'm addicted to the growth. I see myself becoming more confident, more grounded and expressing myself in a more authentic fashion. It's really fucking cool because it transcends pickup and makes my life better on a daily basis. Of course the girls are great too, but even when I'm not pulling much (it's been a month or so?) I'm still really happy. I love the experience, the challenge and doing the work for the sake of doing the work.

*I've noticed that my nights are getting consistently better. I'm having long interactions with women and getting blown out far less.

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PostPosted: Wed Sep 27, 2017 3:54 pm 
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My sister came over last weekend so I haven't been out in five or six nights. Hit up the Tuesday spot and started opening. I'll be damned if anything stuck. I was in that zone where sets don't last but a couple of seconds before the girl turns away. This happens sometimes, usually when I'm in a foul mood. What's strange is that last night I was in a great mood and my mood improved with every set. But I still wasn't hooking anything. I think that I could have pushed past it if there was more opportunity. But there wasn't, we opened till there was nothing left to open.

I'm not sure I have much else to say beyond that. I did everything I could do and I had a really fun night. I couldn't find it, whatever it is. I'll get at it tonight and see what happens.

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PostPosted: Thu Sep 28, 2017 4:34 pm 
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Back into it, I proposed to a cute Italian girl. I almost picked her up and walked out of the club. Not sure what my wingman would have done, he was already telling me to tone it down. Maybe he was right, maybe he wasn't. Sometimes I get more wrapped up in doing insane shit and I lose track of taking actual steps towards the pull. Other times insane shit is what makes the night amazing and I pull because of it.

I walked up to a girl, ignored both her friends, started talking. Almost immediately I encountered mild resistance.

"You need to leave. Please go away. Can't you just leave us alone? That's so awesome! Omg, you are just so cool" Sarcasm you could bottle and sell. I say,

"Your dress looks pink. It could be peach though. I don't like peaches, they bruise too easily. Strawberries are my favorite. Just wash them, cut off the top and you're good to go."

Obviously at this point nothing is ever happening, it's a battle. I'm pushing myself to see how long I can stand here and keep my frame while three girls throw an arsenal of shit at me. It's incredibly awkward. I don't move and my frame is really good. I have a hypothesis. I think that at some point I won the emotional side of my girl. I saw her eyes go big and something changed. Logically she hates me or whatever. But emotionally she's attracted to the guy who is holding a cool frame, even as three women try to run him over. I finally left though, I couldn't hold the frame forever.

I talked to a Danish girl for a while. Got her Facebook, invited her and her friend out to the club tonight. Will she come? Who knows. Pre-Danish girl I was up on another cute girl, all in black. I tried for the makeout, didn't quite happen. Led her towards a different part of the club but the friend ran and grabbed her. Leaving the club, I looked at her, said,

"I'll never see you again will I.."

She smiled, "Nope."

Notes

*I think that I sometimes lose track of what I'm at the club for. I have conversations that go nowhere, I don't try to pull, I don't led enough. I'm waiting for obvious signs and this holds me back. I should lead and move towards the pull with less signs. I can also assume more attraction, regardless of what I see her giving me. Assume the frame that as long as she's still talking to me, she's attracted.

*At one point I met some cool guys and they invited me to their table. I was speaking some Russian and they asked me whether I was Russian. I was in the moment and figured it would be easier to say yes, versus explaining that I learned Russian in Moscow, that I was an English teacher, etc. I didn't want to explain all this so I lied and said I'm Russian. This is dumb. One guy spoke Russian, he sussed out immediately that I'm not a native speaker, things got weird. OK, so what's the lesson here. It's to never, never lie. This is an ideal that I've recently adopted. It's not that I lie a lot, very little. But I want to take that very little and turn it into not at all. Tell the truth no matter what the consequence. In this case it's not like I was being a horrible person, I was just caught up in the party vibe and thought that explaining my Russian ability would slow down the party. But that led to weird consequences. It's a reminder that always fucking always tell the truth, even when it's seemingly inconsequential.

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