Disclaimer: I'm a complete beginner at this, please indulge me. I tried looking for similar posts but don't know where to find them.
So, I met this girl online at a common interests forum and am clueless how to proceed. Problem is, she lives far away so we only get to 'talk' online. I've been reading some of the beginner guides here and a lot of the stuff seem to emphasize stepping up one's game IRL (mannerisms, confidence, speech, 'appearance', etc.) and it makes perfect sense, buuuut, there's really only so much you can do in front of a dumb old keyboard and I'm not sure whether I should risk a 'random' trip to the area to meet her, maybe on a sightseeing/business trip or something.
Now, I know this smacks terribly of oneitis but hear me out first. I'm salesman by profession and between my job, gym, and self-study (business stuff) I hardly ever encounter girls I like (read: complete utter nerds) ever since I broke up with my last girlfriend.
Well, I added her (new girl) on FB, chat her up randomly when I feel like it, throw some harmless barbs here and there, talk about common interests sometimes but still mostly feel clueless as to how to proceed. How do I gauge her interest? How do I know if she's receptive? Should I be blunt? Is there a time-period I should capitalize on? How do I attract her? (known her about a month or so). I usually initiate convos, though sometimes she does, too. Typically, I just chat her about random stuff just to get her in a conversation, common interests (sometimes) poke harmless fun, hypothetical situations, etc. and then typically ditch the convo in the middle when I have to do something else, though sometimes I do it intentionally when I sense she's sorta enjoying the conversation. Also, I try not to ask her about personal stuff and usually leave her in the dark about my own details, besides a few simple facts just to establish a basic identity of sorts.
About the girl: seems terribly shy, pretty sure she's a bookish introvert, one of those indoor, sentimental types, if you will.
Finally, I seriously don't mind passing her up if she's not interested, I just want to know how to improve my odds.
If there's any threads/posts/guides you can refer me to, please point them out! Thanks a lot in advance!
Don't half ass it. Either show interest and escalate the relationship, or move on. Personally, I'd say move on, since it appears you guys are a significant distance apart.
It sounds like she's just a random friend who probably isn't all that interested in you (sexually) and will be happy to continue to maintain a friendship via online methods. Go meet new women OP.