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OdysseusNoman
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 Posted: Wed Aug 22, 2007 11:21 am Post subject: I Can't Talk Long |
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| I can open and talk, but i run out of interesting shit to say real fast, and after that everything i say leads nowhere. Can some pua's give me some good lines and topics to keep the convo going? |
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Israel
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Joined: 03 Aug 2007
Posts: 67
Location: Boston, MA
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votes: 5
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| Posted: Wed Aug 22, 2007 2:18 pm Post subject: |
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| One of the trickiest (for some people - myself included) but also most important parts of this whole thing is you just need to get talkative. Start trying this around everyone not just HB's or sets. Once you get used to just constantly saying something than the trick is to do the same thing but make sure what you're saying is interesting. There's no way you can keep an entire night going on just canned material u kno? |
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North
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Joined: 14 Aug 2007
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| Posted: Wed Aug 22, 2007 7:05 pm Post subject: |
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Your problem is that you're afraid that what you talk about won't be interesting. You don't believe you are interesting. But you ARE.
Don't be afraid to talk to people. Israel's advice is a very good one.
Go back to that anti-AA training for a bit and go out a few times on what I call "ego trips". Randomly talk to strangers, do not think of them as guys or girls. Don't use openers, just tell those people that you're curious and feel like speaking to them. Just think of anybody you meet as people you might find interesting. And just talk without any pressure, holding a conversation will come as something natural soon enough. |
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OdysseusNoman
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| Posted: Wed Aug 22, 2007 9:07 pm Post subject: |
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| It has nothing to do with fear, I can keep talking but it's not interesting. I think i should of phrased my post differently. I need topics that women find interesting and that can run for a good amount of time. |
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negsta
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Joined: 08 Aug 2007
Posts: 210
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| Posted: Wed Aug 22, 2007 9:12 pm Post subject: |
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Studies have shown that if you're going to build rapport with a girl, travel is an awesome topic to use, as it's very unlikely to create conflict. Of course this study did take place with a random cross section of people, which means mostly AFCs. Despite this, I don't see how it can hurt a PUAs game and opens up routines like future projection, etc.
8 :wink: |
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Frozec
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Joined: 23 Aug 2007
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Location: Hamptons, NY
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| Posted: Fri Aug 24, 2007 11:36 pm Post subject: |
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| Tell her a story......be creative and funny with it......but make it relate to something goin on in the enviorment around you..........or you can take the random apporach......its your call......there has to be some intresting story you can tell ppl to higher your DHV.....if you don't feel you have a good story make one up |
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BigB
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Joined: 22 Aug 2007
Posts: 100
Location: California
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| Posted: Sat Aug 25, 2007 10:27 pm Post subject: |
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| Your from NY, tell her some story about some crazy day you had in NYC.... you hit up the subway, and some homeless dude was going crazy... then you got stuck in a cab with some crazy cabbie... keep it fun! |
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Fifty1Fifty
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Joined: 24 Aug 2007
Posts: 37
Location: San Francisco, CA
Reputation: 4.4
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| Posted: Sun Aug 26, 2007 1:50 am Post subject: Re: I Can't Talk Long |
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| OdysseusNoman wrote: | | I can open and talk, but i run out of interesting shit to say real fast, and after that everything i say leads nowhere. Can some pua's give me some good lines and topics to keep the convo going? |
I was about to post the same thing.... WTF are some key items to go off of for a convo to keep goin? |
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Mr Fahrenheit
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Joined: 19 Aug 2007
Posts: 262
Location: Australia
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| Posted: Sun Aug 26, 2007 1:13 pm Post subject: |
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Israel is the most correct here, the better you are at just speaking and speaking and working off reactions both verbal and physical the better you will be when you talk to women. Make it a goal to not go anhour without talking to someone you dont know. Talk to 1000's of people and soon you will find what topics people like to talk about and interesting qwerks about how people react with strangers.
'The more I practice the luckier I become' Gary Player
The more time you spend conversing with people the more luck you will have in keeping a conversation going and going. |
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villain
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Joined: 06 May 2007
Posts: 114
Reputation: 16.5
votes: 1
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| Posted: Sun Aug 26, 2007 4:02 pm Post subject: |
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| Israel wrote: | | One of the trickiest (for some people - myself included) but also most important parts of this whole thing is you just need to get talkative. |
To a degree you're right, however being talkative, is not always the key. Sometimes you can be stuck on a particular conversational thread, and keep going with that thread going no where. There's a point where you can over talk, and over kill the moment with your droning conversation, and presto you've become boring.
The key to a great conversation, is a technique called "open ended questions". Do a search on this, i've come across some threads with this topic, of conversational style.
| curse wrote: | | the better you are at just speaking and speaking and working off reactions both verbal and physical the better you will be when you talk to women |
Great advice, but if you're like me... and you're wondering, ok that's easier said than done. Because there's been no method really given to help you out. Kudo's on the thought process curse, but not the most sound advice for someone who suffers from poor conversational technique, not AA.
| Quote: | | Make it a goal to not go anhour without talking to someone you dont know. Talk to 1000's of people and soon you will find what topics people like to talk about and interesting qwerks about how people react with strangers. |
This is advice that i would offer to you if you were suffering from AA
As I mentioned before, open ended questions are the key to maintaining great conversations. Questions that ask about the how, and the why, and the where and the when, helps maintains the conversation. Because, you're not doing the work to maintain the conversation, you're providing who ever you're talking to the opportunity, to carry the conversation. Some examples of good and bad open ended questions to ask...
You're always smiling, how come you're so happy?
The key to this open ended question, is the validation or justification, of the question you're about to ask. "you're always smiling" That's your reason why you're asking, then it's followed by your question "HOW come you're so happy". It's a two part question, offering the person you're talking to the ability to lead the conversation, because remember it's "all about them" not you. As soon as you talk about your self you become annoying, self-fish, and perhaps a touch narcissistic, all traits which reflect negatively upon yourself.
What's the time?
A closed ended question, requiring no more than a one worded response. It's 10 am. Notice, there's no justification for asking this question, preceding your question. Conversations around these sorts questions can lead to a sequence of closed ended questions... eg.
What do you do?
I'm a teacher
so do you like your job?
Yes
Following a sequence of closed ended questions, ultimately can lead to a very very boring conversation.
Now, if then you think you've also mastered the key to answering open ended questions, try this technique, for improving your ability to talk 'on the fly'. The main idea behind this technique is to eliminate from your conversation, words like "um..." and "ahhh..." and precursors for conversations, eg. "like" (oops) and "so.." Words like this can damage your confidence while you're speaking, because words like these show you're struggling to maintain the conversation. So to eliminate this, pick out a random object in your room, library, or where ever you are, and try to talk about that object for 30 seconds without any long pauses, or any "thinking words", eg "like, umm... etc". I'm betting right now you wouldn't be able to go 5 words without stumbling. TRY IT LOL... Who know's, if you become proficient enough at this skill, you may be able to make this into a gambit, and hussle you're target.
Hope this helps.... i'm off to bed... |
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J_boy84
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Location: louisiana
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| Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2007 12:54 am Post subject: listen to the woman |
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| while all the advice is good, but the best way to get a conversation going is by listening to the HB and find the clues in her sentance and use it or turn it around and tease her with her own words. the HB will usually drop clues to what she wants to talk about. and you must talk to lot of people using different topics if you want to get better at being a conversationist. |
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magicJ2007
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Joined: 06 Jun 2007
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Location: California, bay area Fremont
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| Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2007 6:22 am Post subject: |
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dude , talk about anything.
The true reason you dont know what to say , or run out of what to say is because you have a WEAK INNER GAME, your Frame is weak, you got AA some level.
If your frame is strong, you will control the conversation no matter wat the hell you say.
My recommondation is to have a strong inner game, and strong frame. And over a periods of time you will notice that no matter what you say , it gets the girls.
REMEBER, IS NOT WHAT YOU SAY ........ IT IS HOW YOU SAY IT................. THAT MAKES A HUGE DIFFERENCE.
MAGIC J |
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Mike
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Joined: 22 Aug 2007
Posts: 137
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| Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2007 4:40 pm Post subject: |
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| An idea that came to me a few days ago is to make a list of a bunch of subjects, situations, jobs, celebrities, and places. Think of a funny story or observation for each of them. Like a comedy routine. This way, you have a good chances of having something to say no matter where the conversation goes. |
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Mech
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Joined: 30 Jul 2007
Posts: 245
Location: Pittsburgh, PA
Reputation: 54.3
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| Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2007 5:00 pm Post subject: |
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| magicJ2007 wrote: | dude , talk about anything.
The true reason you dont know what to say , or run out of what to say is because you have a WEAK INNER GAME, your Frame is weak, you got AA some level.
If your frame is strong, you will control the conversation no matter wat the hell you say.
My recommondation is to have a strong inner game, and strong frame. And over a periods of time you will notice that no matter what you say , it gets the girls.
REMEBER, IS NOT WHAT YOU SAY ........ IT IS HOW YOU SAY IT................. THAT MAKES A HUGE DIFFERENCE.
MAGIC J |
Best post in this thread. This problem is 100% in your head. You DO have interesting things to talk about it, and they'll start to be easier to access under pressure as you get more and more comfortable talking to people.
The way to get better is to keep practicing. If someone tells you an interesting story, change it a little and use it as your own. It's not lying, it's flirting. As you push your comfort zone more and more, you will get better at pulling interesting/funny things to say out of your mind. |
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mhowerton0567
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Joined: 28 Aug 2007
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| Posted: Wed Sep 05, 2007 11:49 pm Post subject: my two cents |
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Okay...Women are attracted to your social status, a high energy guy, who is smiling, talking to a lot of people, and talking about whatever...literally whatever, engage people and try to be genuinely interesting. You dont small talk your friends in the car do you? what are you talking about? it may be a spur of the moment conversation topic. try and act everyone you open is a close friend, this will help to gain rapport, and u might have a great conversation, and thus will gain you more rapport and social status.
Lead the frame, its important to lead the conversation, your talking to her or them because your bored, you want to entertain YOURSELF, they are just there, there not special to you yet, unless you make them feel that way. good way to demonstrate higher value.
if your on a bad conversation topic, simply cut that string, and start a new one, the responsibility is on you to ensure to conversation stays warm |
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