I tried to do the Newbie mission , a slightly modified version.
I feel so failed
Please keep in mind that my main language is not english, its portuguese, and there is a big cultural difference between us, but i dont care.
I walked around my city and i tried to Say hello to any girl i saw, or Good Afternoon to any Older person i see.
I passed around like 4 or 5 girls in total, and something really bad happened, Whenever i was locked and loaded mentally to say "HELLO" my words simply didnt come. I felt like blocked! I feel im gonna be seen as a weird rapist and i dont want them to call their families to beat the shit out of me...
I know this is a lot exagerated! In my Reasoning i know its illogical, and ITS THEM who should be polite and answer me. however in my soul its craved all sort of negative toughts that Block me the moment i TRY to spray a simple Hello.
I only managed to say Good afternoon to a old woman who was looking at me as if she knew me from somewhere, she probably is friend with my grandmother, dunno.
Has anyone ever felt anything like this?
You are Filled with courage, and u are about to Shoot a HELLO, and u even have a sort of pseudo-smile in your mouth, and u are looking at her (most of the time they dont even look back, but i just want to say hello anyway!), And the moment u give the signal to your brain to move your vocal cords to say Hello, u simply cant do it, u block it. Please tell me this is normal, and with pratice it wil eventually go out. I have tried some thing like the noob mission for like 4 ou 5 tries already, and in total, around 50 women, i only managed to say hello to:
-one little girl , shes like 12 , she was seating next to me when i was in the coffe with my grandfather.
-A girl that is my friend, shes 16, but i think this doesnt count, since i already know her.
-Some old folk cuz i feel they will be more friendly.
-and today i SORT OF smiled to a girl that crossed me in the street she was older than me, probably 22-25, , i mean Sort of smiled, because i dont even know if i was really smiling, i tought i was... but when i was going to say hello, i blocked..
please, i need motivation, i will not give up on this shit, im not the give up type of guy, but im feeling like a complete failure