Ejected from set by a bouncer. Inner game advice needed.



Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 12 guests
Post new topic Reply to topic   Board index » Get Into The Game: New Forum Members Start Here » General Questions




Author Message
PostPosted: Mon May 08, 2017 12:54 am 
Offline
New to MPUA Forum

Joined: Mon Apr 10, 2017 2:40 am
Posts: 3
Last night was out in a large club in Asia. Got inside and was pretty empty, there were 2 girls seated at a table in the bottle service area looking at me, and the other 2 members of the table - guy and girl were standing on the other side facing the dance floor. It was one of my first approaches of the night and I was mainly focussed on warming up so I approached and sat down. It became apparent that their English wasn't great, however I was already there so thought I'd continue the convo to build my social momentum. The girls offered me a drink of which I declined, and I shook hands with the guy of the table who left us alone. A bouncer approached the girls, pointing at me, Didn't catch exactly he said but I assume he was asking them if they wanted me gone. They shook their heads and he went away. I continued the convo but could feel it fizzling out due to the language barrier and loud music and was going to politely eject shortly, however about 5 minutes after the bouncer left, he came back again grabbed me by my arm and pulled me up without saying a word. As I turned to walk away he pushed me in the back, a very cheap way of saying stay away I presume. It really hit me hard from an inner game perspective, as it was the first time ever that id felt that perhaps approaching girls was not a permitted thing to do. I've been rejected enough times by girls themselves but this was something else. Resultantly I had pretty low energy the rest of the night but still managed 3 makeouts from stifled Chodey dance floor game. However, id really appreciate some views on how to recover your state from something like this when infield. The cringeworthiness of being manhandled by a bouncer in front of everyone keeps playing over and over in my mind.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon May 08, 2017 1:03 am 
Offline
PUA Forum Leader

Joined: Tue May 10, 2011 5:53 pm
Posts: 2120
Location: Pittsburgh, PA
Or the bouncer was an insecure douche who wanted to fuck the girl, himself, or just a low confidence man who was upset by seeing a guy with the balls to approach. Never assume the worst case scenario.

_________________
These hos ain't loyal


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon May 08, 2017 3:33 am 
Offline
PUA Forum Leader
User avatar

Joined: Fri Aug 10, 2012 12:27 pm
Posts: 2819
You'll sometimes have conflicts and sometimes physical situations with other males when gaming. But you'll live. Heck, a lot of guys go to bars and get in fights or get manhandled by bouncers when they are not actually gaming women. They end up bloody and scarred or in jail. A little shove and an arm grab isn't anything of consequence.

One night to the next, nobody cares what happens in a club or bar. So that night is erased from history at this point. Every approach and every set from this day on is a clean slate.

I think you can learn from this though. When you notice that someone has some sort of vested interest in damaging your game, don't allow yourself to fall victim to it. If you have a way to neutralize them, sure, then by all means do it. But if you can tell a bouncer is targeting you, then eject and move to another set or leave the venue.

_________________
“Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'!” ~Audrey Hepburn


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Tue May 09, 2017 5:36 am 
Offline
MPUA Forum Addict

Joined: Wed Dec 21, 2016 3:50 am
Posts: 201
I have been ejected many times from bars and clubs, and I don't care I never let that thing to hurt my game.
don't take it personally is just part of the game.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Tue May 09, 2017 11:31 am 
Offline
Ask a mod for a custom title

Joined: Sat Jun 20, 2009 1:32 am
Posts: 3821
Sorry, I disagree with the replies to this. What do you guys think...bouncers are just throwing out guys because they're that jealous? Lol. You sat in a RESERVED area, you were not getting anywhere and you stayed. What do you think a bouncers' job is? To kick people out of areas they shouldnt be, especially when they can see the client is not interested. It aint jealousy or someone trying to fuck your game up. Have some self awareness. Of the hundreds of chicks coming in there, of the hundreds of guys hitting on women...you really think a bouncer gets jealous at your 1 approach? Bottle service area is expensive and reserved...he was actually nice to you...because the moment you tried to enter that area as a non VIP paying person, many bouncers would grabbed you then and there.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Tue May 09, 2017 12:51 pm 
Offline
MPUA Forum Enthusiast

Joined: Tue May 02, 2017 12:35 am
Posts: 78
neo87 wrote:
Sorry, I disagree with the replies to this. What do you guys think...bouncers are just throwing out guys because they're that jealous? Lol. You sat in a RESERVED area, you were not getting anywhere and you stayed. What do you think a bouncers' job is? To kick people out of areas they shouldnt be, especially when they can see the client is not interested. It aint jealousy or someone trying to fuck your game up. Have some self awareness. Of the hundreds of chicks coming in there, of the hundreds of guys hitting on women...you really think a bouncer gets jealous at your 1 approach? Bottle service area is expensive and reserved...he was actually nice to you...because the moment you tried to enter that area as a non VIP paying person, many bouncers would grabbed you then and there.


Many up market clubs and bars in the UK will only allow males in who are with other females(s) and even then the ratio must be equal or the group containing more women than men. ROAR policies etc. Its to curb the creeps rather than PUAs. Solution is to hit these places with a group of girls who are friends and another guy if there is enough of you.

As for VIP areas you need to have contacts in your social circle before you attempt to game in these areas so that you are in there legitimately

Prior planning Prevents etc


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Fri May 12, 2017 5:01 am 
Offline
MPUA Forum Zealot

Joined: Wed Jun 29, 2016 3:01 am
Posts: 383
I had my face in a girl's bra with her nipple in my mouth while sitting on a couch at the old Ministry of Sound in Singapore (her goods concealed by her dress) . A patrolling bouncer saw this .. flashed a light at me, leaned over.. and said "stop 'groping' her."

Then he left. And I went back at it.

No idea what his issue was. The guys here are probably right, either you were in a VIP area and someone ratted you out or you came off as a creep and the bouncer thought it was best that you go...

_________________
Likes attract likes. All comments are geared towards generating lasting attraction for the purpose of a relationship with a well-rounded female (attractive, well educated and cultured, plus knows what she wants in her work and personal life).


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Fri May 12, 2017 5:44 am 
Offline
New to MPUA Forum

Joined: Fri May 12, 2017 4:53 am
Posts: 5
I would say start with low gravity places with women who tend to be 6's or 7's on average. use a place like that to warm up and become confident for the night. Lets face it, nobody is really going to try to take home a 6, and the attraction will be so easy because the chicks aren't really that good looking will make you feel like superman.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Fri May 12, 2017 11:02 am 
Offline
PUA Forum Leader

Joined: Tue May 10, 2011 5:53 pm
Posts: 2120
Location: Pittsburgh, PA
ToystorePUA wrote:
I would say start with low gravity places with women who tend to be 6's or 7's on average. use a place like that to warm up and become confident for the night. Lets face it, nobody is really going to try to take home a 6, and the attraction will be so easy because the chicks aren't really that good looking will make you feel like superman.


Terrible idea. That is a great way to learn bad habits.

_________________
These hos ain't loyal


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Fri May 12, 2017 5:52 pm 
Offline
MPUA Forum Zealot

Joined: Wed Jun 29, 2016 3:01 am
Posts: 383
ToystorePUA wrote:
I would say start with low gravity places with women who tend to be 6's or 7's on average. use a place like that to warm up and become confident for the night. Lets face it, nobody is really going to try to take home a 6, and the attraction will be so easy because the chicks aren't really that good looking will make you feel like superman.


Hahah.. PUA classic. Worthless post to the max.

Arbitrary ratings given to whole groups of women, which apparently decide to congregate in one particular venue. Holy shit. Darwin award nomination here thanks to the cringe-worthy assumptions.

_________________
Likes attract likes. All comments are geared towards generating lasting attraction for the purpose of a relationship with a well-rounded female (attractive, well educated and cultured, plus knows what she wants in her work and personal life).


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Sun May 14, 2017 1:13 am 
Offline
Moderator

Joined: Sat Jul 02, 2011 4:37 am
Posts: 3276
I'm not sure what part of the world you are in, but here I know the job of a bouncer in the big clubs is to coordinate with the other bouncers to remove patrons who are possibly violent, or ruining the experience of others. You also have to work security on private parties that are reserved for private areas, I get the sense that this is likely what that bouncer was doing in your situation. He likely was not supposed to let you in to that area but failed and when it was too late he tried to correct his mistake.

The other main things are removing people who have become too drunk or need to be cut off, as well as prevent people from fucking inside the club (clubs also hire bathroom attendants for this).

Basically you are there as a bouncer to prevent liability and keep the club atmosphere safe and legal.

You probably shouldn't take it personally you just snuck up to some girls and a bouncer didn't catch you until you were already too deep in.

Just be aware of how you are making people feel and the realization that you can observe and focus on how you feel and change the feeling of a conversation by being patient and certain of the experience you want.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Wed May 17, 2017 3:42 pm 
Offline
New to MPUA Forum

Joined: Fri May 12, 2017 4:53 am
Posts: 5
Not really fellas. Its called a "warm up". Gets you comfortable and back in the swing of things. If you are thinking that its not good practice, then what are you thinking? (I'm not trying to start an argument, I'm genuinely curious). Sure if you want to get tens then it wouldn't work, but you have to start building your confidence somehow, and if its faltered how do you expect to build it backup? We all had to do practice swings before we stepped up to plate to try and hit a home run.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Wed May 17, 2017 7:50 pm 
Offline
Read My Book
User avatar

Joined: Thu Jun 27, 2013 8:08 pm
Posts: 4969
Location: New York City
Time heals all.

This is not something you truly have to learn to recover from, as it's not somethings that is going to occur often. Just take it in stride and move along. How do you learn to recover from normal rejection? By getting rejected over and over and bouncing back. Remember the first time you truly got rejected? How did it feel? Probably the way this does, but I bet you don't care. Nor will you care about this in 3 days.

_________________
Need Coaching? For 1 on 1 Coaching via Skype, Phone or Instant Messenger - Email: EddieFews@Gmail.com

Show Support, Buy The Book: 'The Secret Laws Of Social Wisdom - Click Here

http://www.EddieFews.com


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Thu May 18, 2017 1:40 pm 
Offline
Ask a mod for a custom title
User avatar

Joined: Sun Nov 27, 2011 3:23 am
Posts: 3460
Lol, like Eddie said, take it in stride. I've been here a few times and I had the same reaction as you did. Except I grilled the bouncer and made him uncomfortable. This year alone I had an encounter with two bouncers. The next couple of times went like this: the first bouncer was pushing me aside while he was moving around in this college bar. I think he was trying to get to his post. There was no fight, no reason for him to push me so I held my ground and he got upset. Unfortunately for him, I was not in college and a Pussy like the rest of the bar and I was not drunk. So when I told him not to push me and he can say excuse me, it threw him off guard. He went to his post and I stood up for myself that night.


The next time was warranted. I tried to sneak into a bar/dance club by going under the railing. It was St. Patrick's day and it was crowded. My girlfriends sneaked in and they were not caught, so I sneaked in. Next thing I know is I hear a "you want to go to jail?!" And I am being grabbed by my vest and being pushed out the area. Funny thing is that I was smirking as I was being pushed out. I've been in contact with bouncers so many times after this that I was like "oh here we go again, but I guess I deserve this one" and I was smirking on my way out.

Mind you, it was crowded and a lot of people saw that including my girlfriends and my roommate. I held my smirk and looked at them and said "guess we have to go somewhere else, lol" and life moved on. OP, this experience is a learning one! Don't look at it as negative. This too shall pass.

_________________
In a funk? Read this

pua-lounge/the-importance-patience-this-game-vt197398.html?hilit=Patience%20in%20this%20game


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 14 posts ] 

All times are UTC


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  

Can we be honest?

We want your email address. Let me send you the best seduction techniques ever devised... because they are really good.
close-link