Frame control has been messing me up lately,

anyone care to help me out with how frame control works and how to excel at it?

I want to control the frame with not just girls but every conversation I have with anyone.


How do I establish my own reality and have the ability to have a stronger reality than others. Im good with girls, but my problem is with my guy friends who have a stronger frame control then me, which leads to them not even hitting me up anymore.

I'm not a yes man, I want to know how to become a solid leader whether it be with my current friends or with new ones I meet.

thanks

Being confident in your own reality, staying congruent in and out and being non-reactive are all good ideas.

it will mostly come down to emotional control, and your ability to make descisions and be sure of them,

basically you have to figure out what you want, then stay confident that it is infact what you want, when you descide something remain sure of it

people will test your confidence, and you have to hold control over yourself and your emotions and take what they say into consideration, but do so under your own power

the frame is the meaning behind the interaction, who ever is the most sure of themselves will be able to define the meaning the easiest

for example if you go up to a girl, and you tell her she is cute, and she gives you this look that says, ''you can't be serious you can't get me''

at that point what happens to you, do you lose control of yourself and hand her the frame?, let her control your emotions and define what the meaning behind the interaction is?, or do you just remain unreactive emotionally to what she does and continue being sure of yourself? eventually one person will give in and be less sure of themselves, the person who has the stronger frame can control what the meaning is behind the interaction

it mostly comes down to ability to control your own emotional state, and remaining in alignment with what you want and being sure of it (congruence)

much appreciated guys.



how would I be able to lead a conversation with other guys? for example if I just meet them, how do I display my dominance through both body language and conversation? I don't want anyone to look down on me

can you provide specific examples?


also how do I influence people to look through my reality rather than me getting sucked into theirs? In other words, how do I build a stronger frame?

thanks

Leading a conversation with other guys, generally just be yourself, but a strong version of your self. Know who you are, display that, and most of all, be OK with that.

Have lots of interesting, positive things to talk about, DHV stuff without crossing the line into excessively bragging.

And about avoiding others realities...just know yourself. Know your goals, strengths, weaknesses, what you really think, what you really want, what your attitudes are, values are, beliefs are etc.

Only when you truly know yourself can you have a solid foundation to build from. That goes for pickup, careers, hobbies, literally anything.

Sort of related to that old "Stand up for something or fall for anything" saying.

If you know who you are, and what you want, you will be less likely to be swayed by the opinions and ideas of others.

leading a conversation is about being proactive, cut threads you don't like, and make your own threads (bring up new topics, aka talk about what you want to talk about instead of what someone else does)

if you are the most dominant in the group, then you are the most relaxed, the least fear and anxiety among everyone, the most sure of yourself (you can clearly think for yourself rather then thinking based off another persons point of view, form your own opinions rather then be dependent on other peoples opinions), you can speak your mind clearly the easiest among everyone without fear of what they think, don't hesitate when you speak, don't allow people to force you to do things, or answer questions you don't want to answer (this doesn't mean never answer anyone's questions that is weird), it is about being strong, confident, centered within yourself and uncontrollable, you can play with the levels of dominance to the point where you become domineering, how ever it is in my opinion that you won't be able to attract many people to you if you are domineering, it is better to be uncontrollable rather then a control freak

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RNSnMFgNq1Q[/youtube]


[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bi1MemQ8MqY[/youtube]







[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=saMzvzYd1PM[/youtube]





how you influence others is just to be most sure of yourself and secure in what you believe, people tend to look to other people that are more secure then themselves, the more sure of yourself you are, the more sure others will be of you as a side effect

to strengthen your frame work on things like putting yourself into uncomfortable situations more often so that you feel more comfortable in all situations, you can also practice controlling your emotions (try to remain happy all day, no matter what anyone says or does to you, much harder then it sounds), you can also meditate to work on furthering your ability to focus and control your emotions, work on more proactively expressing yourself and your opinions and believing in them

GOOD LUCK

I'm definitely getting interested in frame control. There's one example from the Ali G video that was unbelievable:

Ali: "So is it that the better a footballer you are, the fitter the girl you go out with"
David: "Yes"
Ali: "So David, you is the best, so you get Posh. Does that mean Sporty Spice goes out with a player from Scunthorpe United?"
Posh: "That's a horrible thing to say - she's my friend and she's lovely"
Ali: "Are you saying Scunthorpe United aren't a good team?"
Posh: "Yes!"
Ali: "Well, that's a horrible thing to say about them!"

Talk about giving some absolutely no room to manoeuvre!

those were some good posts.

how do I not seek approval from everyone around me? I feel like I get caught in everyone else's conversation and my mood is what their mood is.

what are some good techniques/exercises of leading conversation and being the center of attention and influencing rather than influenced

I find that people become Alpha males after they pass my test.
I put them through training in the streets.
I humiliate them and make them do embarresing things so people will laugh at them and riducule them. This hardens their skins.
One of the things from my test is for them to walk in Birmingham town center with only swimming trunks on and shoes. this helps fear of rejection and builds social awareness. They start becoming Alpha males about 3 minutes into the exercise because the body goes into defence mode.
I would like to make them do it naked but it is against the law in the streets so we went to the local sauna and made them walk naked infront of other men.
This really worked and all my students have gone through this process to pass the Jackals test and become a PUA.
DON JUAN was the best talking to guys with no clothes on but SUBZERO isn't far behind him. The are now qualified Alpha males and could AMOG any of the best PUAS in the world.
If you want to complete a Jackals training course the pm me.

Frame control is definitely one of the most interesting concepts in social interaction. The way I understand it to work is like this:


A Frame: I'm hot.

Every action should support this frame. For example, if I tell a girl two girls fought over me last weekend then I am supporting my frame through words. If a girl approached me and asks for my number in front of a girl, this frame is being supported. If she goes to my fb and sees two girls licking my face, I'm hot.
On other hand, if she over hears two girls saying how ugly I am then that frame can be broken. For this reason, it's important you create frames which can be supported by your actions and the world around you.


FRAME: Leader

If you want to be seen (the frame in which they view you in) as a leader, then create a world in where you are a leader. Tell her stories about the time you lead your football team to victory and how happy it made you when your team won. Show her pictures of you instructing a group of men or giving a speech. You, all things leaders do. That creates the impression (or frame) that you are a leader.


FRAME: Sex god

Show her your trophy from your latest orgy competition. Tell her you were once invited to a swingers party, and have been invited to every swingers party in town ever since.. am going over board but you get my drift.


That's how frames essentially work. I will admit it is easier said than done but once you get the hang of creating frames from thin air you could make yourself look any way you want in the eyes of some one else. That's the beauty of frames.