It’s been a tough week. Had a bout of one-itis over a girl I kissed closed, and did see relationship potential with. We had an insta date the first time we met at the mall. HB 7.5, slim, black hair, wearing a blue spaghetti top that exposed an black tattoo on her left back. She had a cute face with nicely done eye liner. She was at a supermarket checkout counter, and I was with PUA joe.
Joe came up to me and asked “dude are you gonna open or can I?” I said “no bro, this set is mine.”
“ok man
” he replied. Joe was a pretty attractive guy. Sincere and down to earth. The kind you’d be friends with even if you weren’t united by your common pursuit of game.
Turns out HB 7.5 was new in town. Openers aren’t pivotal in attraction or seduction, but I’ve always got really smooth ways to open a set. She was spending quite a bit of time at the counter; fumbling for change, trying different credit cards, and she spent a good 5 minutes there before she left with her groceries.
I was just standing on the outside, playing it cool, and standing confidently, as I knew this was going to be a good set. As she walked by, I made a passing comment:
“That was a reallyy long time at the checkout counter”
She smiled, heaved a sigh, then started lamenting about how this was a new country and experience for her; she just landed on the same day we met.
She seemed really happy to have met me. Maybe it’s because I’m quite a natural conversationalist, or she watches too much television where a stranger sweeps you off your feet in a random chance encounter and you guys live happily ever after. Either way, she was responding well.
In day game it’s really important to get involved; to move beyond the formalities of the typical ice breaker questions and to start acting as if you guys are friends or a couple already. This is what many would chemistry, and it’s achievable by judging the situation and her facial expressions. This shifts her frame from “this is a random guy I met” to “wow holy shit we get along so well”.
So I noticed she bought quite a bit of stuff in a shopping cart. I asked to take a look, and teased her choice of foods for being too healthy. Then made fun of an expensive body sponge looked much more like a toilet cleaner, telling her she was taken in by the well-designed label more than anything. She frowned, but realized I was right.
Now that I look back at the entire interaction, it was way too friendly. There were little elements of escalation. Not enough sexual teasing, physical escalation was too timid, bordering on what friends would do. 60yoc proposes the green yellow and red model, and to progressively work toward green. I was probably at yellow, and I didn’t push it enough to green. No excuses, I will learn from this, next few approaches will be less harmless, more natural physical contact. And more corny routines to build attraction. Chick crack they call it. And from experience, I know they really differentiate you from generic guys. Adds an element of mystery to you too.
Anyhow, we went on an insta date and she didn’t have any plans. I did tease her as we shifted from location to location. Looking back, I should have made better eye contact with her when we talked.
So it was getting late and she had to go back. We hugged and I kissed her on the cheek goodbye. I was like fuck this shit let’s go for the lips, but she was like “no no!” damn. :/ I was quite happy that I went for it though. If I built enough physical comfort, a full kiss close would have definitely been possible.
Anyhow, I was busy the following weekend with other friends. So I was not able to meet her, though she did propose going to the beach and hinted at having brunch together. The week after that, I believe the attraction had fizzled out, the hook point was lost. The time between her text responses got longer, and it was evident she was losing interest. I’ve dropped her now, which is sad considering that our first encounter went well. If she does hit me up again, she’d have to earn back my interest.
There are still traces of AFCism in my thoughts. But that will soon go away. I now accept that I am living a new life and that I have come a long way.
There are other girls I am texting. Went on a friendly date with 1. Will update next round on the outcome of that.
Apart from routines and experience, a new area that is critical to for game, and my career, development is EQ (
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/12/0 ... d%3D415893)