Kicking Ass and Taking Names in NYC


Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7  Next
Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 4 guests
Post new topic Reply to topic   Board index » Real Life Gaming » Field Reports




Author Message
PostPosted: Sun May 28, 2017 3:45 am 
Offline
Member of MPUA Forum
User avatar

Joined: Sat Apr 01, 2017 6:27 pm
Posts: 105
Today I went on a date with Julie who I met last Tuesday. I hardly ever go on dates so I was nervous. When out at the bar I see a girl and then talk to her, no time for anxiety. But with a date I have all day to think about it and psych myself out. Julie is cute too, not the cutest girl I've ever slept with, but probably the cutest I've ever gone on a date with. We spent about two hours together and I have some thoughts on it.

My texting to get her on the date was good. I watched a texting program and took a few valuable lessons from it. Like this: when you set up the date beforehand, keep it vague. So for this, we said "Saturday evening". Then, when Saturday rolls around, you text to set up a time "7 PM" which also serves to establish that the date is still on. Whereas if you agree upon an exact time and place early in the week, than you have to chode yourself out by confirming the meetup the day of.

Meeting up I went for the handshake first which I really didn't want, I wanted a hug in order to get physical immediately. I awkwardly did the hug, it wasn't great. Better next time.

Our date was walking across the Brooklyn bridge together, and as we did it I could feel her warming up to me. She was a bit cold and logical in the beginning but it got better over time. What really made her attracted was when I told stories. At the end of the night I told her a story about driving my motorcycle and she melted, it was powerful to see.

I never tried to kiss her till the last moments. I'm torn on this. My intuition was telling me that it was better to wait to go for the kiss, but I don't have a lot of experience here and my intuition may be faulty. The entire date was very smooth, but I realize that's not an indication of "good" either. I'm going to be thinking about this a lot, but I think that if I could repeat it, I would go for the kiss earlier. I never really "saw" a good opportunity, but what needs to happen is that I make one.

At the end I invited her back to my place to watch a movie. She declined. When I did finally go for the kiss at the end of the date she wouldn't do it. She had some excuse or another. She was giving me multiple signs that she was into me and attracted though, so not 100% sure what's going on. I definitely plan to see her again and when we do finally sleep together, I plan to ask her exactly what she was feeling and why she wouldn't kiss. I'm very curious to discover her thinking.

This being my first date since the dinosaurs were alive, and this being the cutest girl I've ever gone on a date with, I'm thrilled with how it went. I feel like I learned a lot. More than just that, I had a lot of fun! It was an enjoyable way to spend a Saturday evening, I should do this more often.

I'm going to get very good at game. I have 0 doubts, I've had 0 doubts for months but experiences like this reinforce it. Learning game may be an emotional skill, but I can still see parallels to learning a language. Anyone can do it, you just have to put in the time.

_________________
Daily Field Reports and Thoughts on Game: www.OutinBlack.com


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Wed May 31, 2017 2:43 pm 
Offline
Member of MPUA Forum
User avatar

Joined: Sat Apr 01, 2017 6:27 pm
Posts: 105
Seventy minutes flew by last night. I warmed up by doing the most difficult set I could find, and the rest of the night went great. It was my last night in New York for two weeks. In twenty minutes I'm taking a taxi to JFK and going to Ukraine for half a month. Hottest women in the world as far as I'm concerned. Should be interesting, but let's look at a few things from last night.

The Oak Tree

I'm doing better with my posture and not leaning in, but I'm still not at 100%. I still feel myself leaning and swaying around too much. I don't like this because it's not good, strong alpha behavior like I want. Although, I will say that if a girl is tall and talks loud, that helps considerably. It's the short girls who speak quietly that usually cause me to bend around in weird directions.

The Not Awkward Open

My favorite set of the night happened fifteen minutes into the night. I was talking to my wingman when I saw three cute girls and I said:

"We have to find a way to open them!"

It wasn't ideal, they were closed off and two guys were blocking them. So I reached through the middle of this whole quagmire, held out my hand to one of the girls, and she took it. Now we're holding hands in the middle of the group, everyone is looking at us, and I've never felt more at ease in my life. I was staring directly into her eyes with fantastic, unwavering contact. After everyone saw that this situation was cool, they let us be. Sadly the friends pulled her away after a while and I wasn't sure what the exact move was. In retrospect I can see that I have to reapproach her later on.

Brazilian Girl

We talked for about fifteen minutes, I tried to move her but that was a no go. I thought that it was on for most of the set, but at the end it became obvious that things were not going my way. I took her number anyways but I'll never see her. One mistake I made was in moving her. She was sitting down and I tried to convince her to move with me while she was seated. Next time I would have her stand up first, ostensibly to compare heights, and then I would move her.

Indian Girl

Super cute, fun to talk to. We planned our future together. I kept closing space, getting physical. The third time I went for the makeout she finally said:

"You know I'm not going to make out with you! I'll be your wingman, but we're not kissing."

I should have taken her up on that offer. Wish I had, although it was already late and I had to leave. Next time though, if a girl offers, I will immediately lead her and go find some sets to open.

Speaking Illogically

One thing I've pondered quite a bit is finding "illogical" things to talk about in set. Distant Light always talks about this, and I've wondered what he means. For a while I was thinking, does he talk about favorite colors or pizza or some shit?

No way to know, but I think that in terms of how I can be illogical, it means creating stories with the girl. Planning our future together. Kids, a dog, a house, what we'll do for work. It can also mean talking about funny situations, like what would you do if a midget was hitting on you, or whatever. Regardless of what it is, I want to do more of this, and less of the talking about where we work, where we grew up, etc.

Opening Everything

I give myself an A+ for opening everything last night. I would talk to a girl, she would walk away, three seconds later I'd open another one. Doing this illustrated that girls don't care if you were just talking to another girl. I don't know why I've felt like that's a problem, but it's really not a big deal.

Trying

Last night I felt like I was trying too hard to make sets work. I was filling in too many conversational gaps, I was being a little bit too extroverted and try hard. I think that by assuming attraction and knowing my own value I can effectively do less and achieve more. Stepping in that direction, one thing I'm interested in is speaking less and letting silence happen. It will feel awkward at first, that's OK. The worst that can possibly happen is I blow that particular interaction.

_________________
Daily Field Reports and Thoughts on Game: www.OutinBlack.com


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Fri Jun 02, 2017 5:15 am 
Offline
Member of MPUA Forum
User avatar

Joined: Sat Apr 01, 2017 6:27 pm
Posts: 105
Super fucking interesting 1st day in Ukraine. As I write these words the Israeli guy I'm living with is in our living room, making out with a Ukrainian girl he met in the grocery store 45 minutes ago. It's taking a while to make her feel comfortable, but he'll probably be hooking up in the next 15 minutes.

My report starts Wednesday morning when I talked to a cute Ukrainian girl in line at JFK. We were on the same flight to Istanbul. She started the conversation by "accidentally" bumping into my foot and saying sorry. I kept the conversation going by saying hi. We met up again in the Istanbul airport and I walked her to her gate. I got her Facebook but since she doesn't live in Kiev I'll probably never see her.

In Kiev, getting dinner with my friend, I saw a very cute girl sitting by herself. Wanted to talk to her but didn't. She walked away, but then I saw her waiting in line for the bathroom. Went up and introduced myself, it went great. I felt extremely nervous for about 90 seconds than I fell into the groove and everything was good. Found out she isn't in Kiev very much, got her Facebook. Don't like this. Should have asked her out to coffee or a beer right then and there.

Did some more approaches, nothing went very well. Talked to a girl at McDonald's at 7:30 this morning but she said she wasn't interested.

Thoughts on Ukraine

Approaching here is incredibly easy because I feel entitled to the women, even tough they're beautiful. This entitlement comes from knowing that as a guy from America I'm high value and have a lot to offer. Also, I'm effectively rich here. I can go to basically any restaurant or bar, order anything, pay for the girl, and not even look at the check. It doesn't matter. That's a very powerful place to be in for a guy. A common refrain in pickup is that money doesn't matter.

That's true, in the sense that you don't need to drive a BMW or live in Soho to get laid. However, money can matter in that it can give you a feeling of ease and power. It's beautiful knowing that in Kiev, no matter what happens, I can pay for it. Which is totally opposite of NYC where I have to live my whole life with money in mind. Can I afford a taxi? Can I eat there? How much have I spent today? It's not conducive to feeling like a boss.

Entitlement

The entitlement here is so interesting because it shows how easy it is to fix certain problems. For example, I've found it very difficult in NYC to approach in subways, on the street, etc. It requires such a force of will that I almost never do it. But here in Ukraine, my game hasn't changed. I'm still the same fucking person, but because I feel so entitled, I'm walking up to a very cute girl at 7:30 in the morning.

How then, can I translate this feeling of entitlement to NYC? If I could feel the same way towards girls in NYC as I do here, I would crush it.

Same Day Pull

I started this report last night, finishing it now in the morning. The girl my roommate pulled from the supermarket spent the night. That's the first of many more to come.

_________________
Daily Field Reports and Thoughts on Game: www.OutinBlack.com


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Sat Jun 03, 2017 11:33 am 
Offline
Member of MPUA Forum
User avatar

Joined: Sat Apr 01, 2017 6:27 pm
Posts: 105
So far in Ukraine we've only done daygame. Today we went out and I talked to three girls. Having only rarely done daygame I'm not fantastic at it, but game is game. A few more approaches and I'll be doing fine. Here's what happened today.

1. Cute girl waiting for her friend. We vibed, I closed space a bit and put my hand on her shoulder a few times. After five minutes I said we should meet up and get a beer later. She agreed, said she's free today or tomorrow. Ironically I'm not free at all, I have to work. I didn't think that through when I asked her out. In terms of my intent, I wonder how she perceived me? Did I come across as a friend, or a potential guy to hookup with? In night game I'm intense and it's clear what I'm there for. I'm not so sure that I express that as well during the daytime.

2. In the cafe with my German buddy when we see two super cute girls walk by. We run out of the cafe and I run to catch up with them. Talk to the cuter one who doesn't speak much English. We start chatting in Russian. I'm continually throwing conversation out there and she's giving me little in return. I don't think it's going badly though. I think that she's nervous and shy. Eventually they get to the cafe they're walking to, I get her Instagram and we part ways.

3. See a girl coming out of the building, my wingman asks me if I'm going to open her. I hesitate for a second then I run after her. She's 100% not into it and hurries off as soon as the light changes.

That was the day so far. We'll probably do more later. There are so many cute girls in Kiev, daygame is a breeze. Walk up, introduce yourself, chat, ask her for coffee right then or set up a date. All within 5 minutes. So easy. What I need to work on is expressing my intent better. I want to come across as a guy who is going to fuck her, not a silly dude to practice her English with.

_________________
Daily Field Reports and Thoughts on Game: www.OutinBlack.com


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Jun 05, 2017 1:15 pm 
Offline
Member of MPUA Forum
User avatar

Joined: Sat Apr 01, 2017 6:27 pm
Posts: 105
Did a bit of post-lunch daygame today. It's ludicrously easy in downtown Kiev. Stand in one place for 2 minutes and three gorgeous women will walk by. The first one I opened blew me off immediately. She had just watched my wingman open another stunner and I think that she didn't like this. Or she was just having a bad day.

Next one, virtually no response. The one after that went better. A bit freaked out though. Probably not often that some boisterous American comes up and introduces himself. I can understand how a girl would be immediately on guard and not know how to act. I toned it back accordingly but there was no salvaging that.

We started walking back towards our villa when an incredible woman walked past. I turned to look at her and said:

"Oh my god.."

My wingman says "Go man! If you don't go talk to her right now, you'll never see her again."

I chase her down. My other wingman advised me to take off the Oakleys so that I look less like a CIA cunt. I yank them off, run up to her and ask if she knows the best place to get coffee in Kiev. She has no idea so we talk about other things. I sprinkle in a bit of physicality but not much. My vibe was solid. This sounds like cliche, but it was obviously man to woman. Not chode scared out of his mind, to woman. I end up getting her number for drinks later on. She seemed excited about this and told me to call her. In retrospect I could have probably pushed for an instadate. That would have been a good move. Not angry though, I'm still getting a feel for daygame and what's possible. Give me three months here though, forget about it..

Notes

*One thing I've noticed is that I consistently push past those moments where the girl expects you to leave. Like the last girl, she was getting Pepsi from the store and she turned and said:

"Well, nice talking to you!"

I completely ignored that, as if she had never said it. Waited 20 seconds for her to get her Pepsi, then we just kept talking like nothing had happened. This shows a lot of Value? Persistence? Masculinity? I don't know exactly what the right word is, but it's very positive. It shows that you're confident with what you're doing, and you're really interested in talking to her.

*I'm getting a better idea of what my goal is for daygame. I'm approaching to make a favorable impression, get her number, get her on a date. On the date my goal is to break that romantic barrier and then get her back to my place, which will be conveniently located minutes from anywhere I take a girl out to. This is all a different structure than night game, but a vast majority of the important bits are exactly the same.

*Smile when I open. I may not automatically do it because I'm feeling nervous.

*Doing game means becoming numb to reactions, positive or negative. No matter what happens, I know that I'm awesome. I feel good about my life and my decisions. If a girl rejects me, that's fine. Nothing personal. If she likes me that's great! But ultimately it doesn't change much. I'm still going to be doing the same thing and feeling the same way whether we roll around in bed or not.

_________________
Daily Field Reports and Thoughts on Game: www.OutinBlack.com


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Tue Jun 06, 2017 8:10 pm 
Offline
Member of MPUA Forum
User avatar

Joined: Sat Apr 01, 2017 6:27 pm
Posts: 105
Girl from yesterday, texted her a few hours later and she never hit me back. That put me in a slump for the rest of the evening. I propose that this happened because I had built up our future together in my head. She was very cute and I thought the interaction went extremely well. I expected good things. Unfortunately reality bitch-slapped me in the face. It's like poker. When you lose with a shitty hand it doesn't hurt that much. When you get AA and you lose to some dipshit who rivers an inside straight, that blows. What could I do different?

1. It's been said that you should get the number then stay with the girl for at least another 5 minutes. This creates a bubble and makes it seem like you're already on a date. Also, it shows that you care about her, not just the ego boost of getting the number. Yesterday I bounced 30 seconds after getting the number #fail
2. Go for the instadate. It seemed like she had time, I could have asked her out to coffee right there.
3. Failing the instadate, I should have at least seen what direction she was walking in. I think we were walking in the same direction? Yet I took off in order to "meet up with my friends". Which is actually what I did, but it wasn't very smooth. It made it seem like I wanted to get away from her.

I could have done any one of those three things and it probably would have made the interaction more solid. This is conscious competence right now, but it will be interesting to see this reach the point of unconscious competence, where I do all this automatically. Now, to today.

We were having lunch by the window in the cafe when I saw a tall skinny dark haired girl waiting at the crosswalk. She was walking slow, which gave me time to run out of the cafe. I waited till she walked past me then I came from behind her and opened. She was nice and smiled at me, but quickly made it clear that she had plans.

Later at the park I opened a stunning girl walking past on the sidewalk. Again, very nice. It almost, almost hooked, she looked like she was almost ready to stop, but she didn't. Kept walking away from me. I could have walked with her but what I really wanted was for her to stop. Probably didn't make that clear.

Later in the grocery store I opened another stunning woman. She only spoke a bit of English so we spoke in Russian. My confidence was up and I kept engaging her. After 30 seconds I asked if she wanted to get a drink with me but she said no. Very nice about the whole thing though.

That was it for today. General thought is that a few days in Kiev is the best cure for putting hot girls on a throne. You can see more stunning women in twenty minutes than you would see in several hours in most American cities. That helps to put things in perspective. There's always more women. The one you're talking to is special, but not necessarily scarce.

In general I don't think I'm making it clear why I'm talking to the girl. I'm still nervous doing daygame, I don't have it dialed in like nightgame. I think that after another week I'll be doing much better. Confidence comes from taking action and making mistakes.

Finally, I'm giving myself massive props for opening a stunning women in the fucking grocery store! That's so fucking cool. Although she didn't want to go on a date with me, she was very nice and smiled an awful lot. It was a very positive experience, and I have every intention of doing it many more times #Ukraine

_________________
Daily Field Reports and Thoughts on Game: www.OutinBlack.com


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Wed Jun 07, 2017 1:54 pm 
Offline
Dedicated Member

Joined: Mon Dec 01, 2014 4:14 pm
Posts: 648
Any particular reason you aren't doing night game? Nothing at all wrong with doing daygame, I'm just wondering why you aren't doing both daygame and nightgame, which you're more familiar with.

Don't worry about the unsolid numbers too much. It WILL happen with short interactions. Sure, you should have probably tried to push the time that you're in set, but it's a learning curve with daygame, because everyone is on the move going SOMEWHERE to DO something, whereas with night game everyone is basically sticking to one location.


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Wed Jun 07, 2017 6:17 pm 
Offline
Member of MPUA Forum
User avatar

Joined: Sat Apr 01, 2017 6:27 pm
Posts: 105
ChocolatePUA wrote:
Any particular reason you aren't doing night game? Nothing at all wrong with doing daygame, I'm just wondering why you aren't doing both daygame and nightgame, which you're more familiar with.

Don't worry about the unsolid numbers too much. It WILL happen with short interactions. Sure, you should have probably tried to push the time that you're in set, but it's a learning curve with daygame, because everyone is on the move going SOMEWHERE to DO something, whereas with night game everyone is basically sticking to one location.


Yeah exactly, I'm not too worried about it. I've got some lessons to learn, but I think that it'll get better quickly.

As for no nightgame, I guess I'm just kind of going with the flow. My two roommates like daygame better so that's mostly what we do. Although we'll probably do some nightgame on Thursday and Friday so we'll see how that goes..

Report..

We ate a fancy meal, I came out of the restaurant and started running after a girl in a green dress. When I caught up with her she almost jumped in the air when I said hi. Didn't matter, I stayed calm and we started talking. The interaction lasted about five minutes and I feel that it was very solid. When we got to her work she stopped for a minute and then I got her number. I texted her later but she hit me with the "How long will you be here?" text. This is the text that all three of us, in the Kiev Villa, dread.

The thing with Ukrainian women is that they're stunning, but the idea of casual sex hasn't really caught on. Women tend to date, not sleep around. Even on a date, they tend to expect to go on multiple dates before they hook up. Again, this is on average, I don't want to suggest that by any means it's impossible. So the challenge of hooking up with girls here is that we're all leaving soon and we also don't want to go on multiple dates. We often talk about how to combat these obstacles. Part of the solution is getting your game very tight such that a girl will sleep with you anyways, even though she doesn't normally do that. The other part is that we all think it would be a good idea to come back here next summer and stay for a long time.

I opened a girl by commenting on her ankle tattoo. She was very nice and spoke good English, but said she had a boyfriend. She left after two minutes.

I opened a girl who was delivering some homemade backpacks to a store. They were actually really marvelous backpacks, I might go back and buy one. We walked and talked for a while, she was cool and attractive. When we got to the Metro I asked her out but she said she was engaged. She showed me the ring, then we said goodbye.

I opened a girl walking down the street. I could tell just by her vibe that she wanted to get opened. Sometimes it's so obvious that you'd have to be crazy to pass it up. I introduced myself and it started going very well. I was feeling great and she was responding well. However, when I asked her out for a drink, she told me that she has a boyfriend from Miami. I told her that Americans are shady people and not to be trusted, backing this up by saying she didn't have to tell her boyfriend and we should get a drink anyways. She didn't bite, wouldn't give me her number but I got her Instagram.

As far as I can remember that was it. Although I only got one number, all of these interactions went much better. It's taking a few days to dial in the awesomeness but I'm catching on quickly. I'm opening better, getting better reactions, and moving things in the direction that I want. All the while talking to extremely attractive women. It's wicked fun and makes me feel like a king.

_________________
Daily Field Reports and Thoughts on Game: www.OutinBlack.com


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Fri Jun 09, 2017 11:00 pm 
Offline
Member of MPUA Forum
User avatar

Joined: Sat Apr 01, 2017 6:27 pm
Posts: 105
I have a theory about what separates the guys who get good at game from all the other guys who don't reach their desired level. The guy who gets good is the guy who does the most difficult thing, over & over & over. That translates to doing the most difficult approaches, continually busting through your comfort zone, and in a more general sense: getting to the club month in and month out. Tonight I was that guy. With both of my roommates (wingmen) staying in, it would have been insanely easy to not go out. But it's Friday, it's my last weekend in Kiev, fuck man...

I got to the club about midnight. Within a few minutes I talked to my first girl. Terrible response. I soon talked to another. She smiled and was nice, but she was totally unattractive to me. I bounced. Went looking for more, opened another girl and she quickly blew me off. Opened another, blew me off. Opened another, she wouldn't even speak to me. It hurt man, I felt like a fucking loser. I danced a few more minutes then left. Total time in club: 1 hr.

I have mixed feelings. I feel really fucking good that I went out solo in a foreign city and kept approaching, despite very few positives signs. I feel like an outcast because I was out friendless, getting rejected, in a club filled with people in big groups.

I want to write paragraphs about how Ukrainian culture is closed off and cold approach pickup is hard here. Hell, it probably is but there's no point bitching. It's simply this: don't wish the game was different, wish you were better. I wasn't doing horrible approaches, but they were far from great. First night out at a Ukrainian bar in my life though so kudos all around.

Improvements

*Tonality was not great, keep it low and good. Same thing for voice projection, should have been louder.

*Need to approach more. Easy to say after the fact, difficult to do in the moment.

*Probably should have stayed with unattractive girl for a while, talked some in Russian, gotten in the social mood. She could have been my homebase for the night.

_________________
Daily Field Reports and Thoughts on Game: www.OutinBlack.com


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Sun Jun 11, 2017 5:00 pm 
Offline
Member of MPUA Forum
User avatar

Joined: Sat Apr 01, 2017 6:27 pm
Posts: 105
At 2 this afternoon my wingman had a girl over from Tinder and they fucked after 20 minutes. She left thirty minutes after the dick sucking stopped and then a cute Ukrainian girl came over. 45 minutes later they were hooking up. Incredible, I've never seen anyone sleep with two women in the same day. Obviously it happens, but this is the first time that I've seen it.

I feel shitty about myself and I'm glad.

It's good that I feel shitty about myself because it's an indicator I need to take more action. My roommate has more game than me and he's slept with 70 something girls, but we're still in the same ballpark, he's not a pickup god. The reason that he's slaying it right now is because he's hustled harder. He's approached more sets and put more effort into perfecting his text game. I love being around him because he's a constant reminder to take more action and go to the next level.

Today I talked to two women, both of them gorgeous. The first one I asked where the ATM was and then me and my friend followed her there. I hardly talked to her, I regret that. The second woman I asked where the grocery store was. She was a stunning example of the female figure. Impeccable in so many ways. I left after twenty seconds, didn't try to close.

If there is one takeaway from these two sets it's that I don't like doing the situational opener and then transitioning to something more direct. I much prefer to do a more direct open that makes it immediately clear what I'm about.

_________________
Daily Field Reports and Thoughts on Game: www.OutinBlack.com


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Mon Jun 12, 2017 8:27 pm 
Offline
Member of MPUA Forum
User avatar

Joined: Sat Apr 01, 2017 6:27 pm
Posts: 105
Back at the apartment, we're chilling with the Ukrainian girl my roommate hooked up with last week. She claims that she knows us from a past life because we all get along so well. Mostly I speak to her in Russian because her English is a used condom.

Today we did 3+ hours of solid daygame. Approached so many sets and had a really good time. I've gotten way better at it. I used to have a problem with women thinking I was selling something or blowing me off instantly. Not really an issue anymore.

I got one number and two Facebook closes. I'm leaving in two days so it's all kind of pointless anyways, but I tell girls that if they're ever in NYC they should look me up. One girl basically closed me by suggesting a place we could meet up later. Straight up glorious.

I felt very comfortable today, but if there was one thing I could work on it would be relaxing even more. Not feeling like I have to work so hard to keep the interaction going. Let the pressure build, I can take it. Make her fill in the conversation gaps.

I know that will come in time though. Approaching beautiful women here is great training for the brain. Also, I did some approaches solo today and I'm thrilled with myself for that. Pats on the back & all the glory.

PS - Check out the picture of the stunning Ukrainian girl I Facebook closed today.

_________________
Daily Field Reports and Thoughts on Game: www.OutinBlack.com


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Wed Jun 21, 2017 3:26 pm 
Offline
Member of MPUA Forum
User avatar

Joined: Sat Apr 01, 2017 6:27 pm
Posts: 105
There was one interaction that was particularly interesting last night. In the bar for 47 seconds when I see a very cute brunette. I open and she immediately makes it difficult for me. She was dismissive, she didn't give me any positive encouragement, she started browsing her phone. But she never left, and she never told me to leave. Her behavior was all a test. Could I plow through and make the interaction go well, even though she was giving me loads of shit? Could I hold my frame and generate enough good emotions on my own, so that I didn't need any signs from her?

Interactions like these are what get me addicted to game. It's fascinating to feel the flow of the conversation, understand what's happening and battle it out for all it's worth. I was close to getting her to buy into my frame but I couldn't quite do it. I went into my head, I questioned myself, I took things at face value, the set was done. I went and found my wingman and told him about the beautiful women in Ukraine, then we opened some girls and got into it.

The rest of the night I acted in a belligerent fashion. I was bold, I didn't give a fuck, I opened everything in sight. I met some random RSD guys. At one point one of the guys put his arms around the two girls I was talking to. I didn't like this but I wasn't really sure how to handle it in the moment. In retrospect I would do this: grab the hand of the girl I like, spin her, subtly move her around so that we're facing away from the RSD dude and it would be awkward for him to open her again. Although, if this guy was better at game, he wouldn't have tried to win over both my girls. He would have done what a wingman is supposed to do and talked to one of them while I talked to the other.

I have two frames that I'm reinforcing every night I go out: I'm the prize & She's a nympho. The first is an obviously true statement, I just have to convince myself of it. The second gives me permission to take risks and make it sexual because she loves it.

First Night Back

Last night was my first time going out at night in three weeks, apart from this abortion of a night in Kiev. All in all I kicked fucking ass. I really enjoyed my interactions, I enjoyed talking to my wingman, I even enjoyed meeting four random RSD guys who were clueless but fun. Tonight I'm going to my favorite club in NYC with my very talented and outgoing wingman. How much better can life get?

_________________
Daily Field Reports and Thoughts on Game: www.OutinBlack.com


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Thu Jun 22, 2017 4:58 pm 
Offline
Member of MPUA Forum
User avatar

Joined: Sat Apr 01, 2017 6:27 pm
Posts: 105
My wingman said he would hit me up yesterday but that never happened, so I went out solo. When I got to the club I noticed that the vibe was really odd. I've been here maybe 50 times and I know it like my living room. Couldn't place my finger on it, and I saw nothing that caught my eye, so I did the only reasonable thing. Put in my earplugs, sat on the sofa and read Osho for 30 minutes.Then I looked up, saw a cute girl standing alone, approached her.

Perfect height, blonde, nice. Loved her, unfortunately a friend stole her away several minutes deep. Two things I could have changed. My body language was not good, I wasn't facing her directly. I was shifting around and it was very weak. Second thing, my eye contact was 97% fucking amazing. However... The 3% of the time it wasn't great were always the most crucial moments. Just when a sexual vibe was building and it was about to get "uncomfortable", I would break eye contact. I have a tremendous tendency to do this. In general my eye contact is spot on, but I'll often break it off at key moments which kills attraction. I have to consciously force myself to maintain eye contact, even when I start to feel uncomfortable.

The rest of the night I saw exactly three more girls that grabbed my interest and made my dick hard. I talked to two of them. Both times the girls blew me off. I ignored this and focused exclusively on the fact that I saw a cute girl, she made me feel things, and so I talked to her. I can't control her reaction.

Notes

*The number one question from last night is why didn't I feel like diving into the process and making shit happen? Why did I feel so apathetic and have no desire to push comfort zones? A lack of wingman is one thing for sure. But deeper than that, I think it's a belief that I'm not going to sleep with a woman, so what's the point? The math says that I sleep with one woman for every 20 nights I go out, so realistically it is fairly unlikely on any given night that I'll hook up. But I think I'm looking at it from the wrong frame. Instead of seeing it as valueless because I'm unlikely to get a certain result, I should be placing a focus on learning as many lessons as possible, so that in the future I can sleep with one girl every ten nights, then every eight nights, and so forth.

*Everything I do reinforces either the frame that I'm awesome (I approached, god I'm so fucking cool!) or I'm the prize (look at how she's licking her lips when she sees me, or asking me questions, or laughing at my jokes. I'm such a catch, she'll be lucky to find another guy like me). Think about how much better it is to consciously reinforce a frame like this, then it is to tell yourself over and over again I'm so bad with girls..

_________________
Daily Field Reports and Thoughts on Game: www.OutinBlack.com


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Sun Jun 25, 2017 4:16 pm 
Offline
Member of MPUA Forum
User avatar

Joined: Sat Apr 01, 2017 6:27 pm
Posts: 105
I got fairly drunk last night (which is extremely unusual for me) and I both regret it and I don't regret it. The thing is, nothing bad happened (apart from dropping $60 that I really would have liked to spend on other things) but bad things could have happened. I could have pissed people off, sent stupid texts or gotten kicked out of bars I enjoy. All this shit has happened before when I drink and I have no desire to have it happen again. All that being said.....

Last night was about as fun as it gets.

I met up with a new wingman around 8:30 in Meatpacking and we immediately got at it. Talked to a bunch of girls. One cute blonde girl I didn't lead enough and that ended the interaction. It's not that the girl is thinking "oh, this gentleman is not leading, I must tell him to go away!" It's more like she doesn't feel you taking the interaction towards a point of sex, and she feels like we may talk the whole night but nothing will happen. It's the same idea that there is a window to escalate and if you don't make shit happen in that window you're fucked. By yourself. Because you're jerking off. Because you're not getting laid.

Missed the window, bounced around to some more girls, then met up with my other wingman and we started a glorious tour of the bars. Of which I don't really remember much because I was drinking. One set does stand out though. In the bar, roll up on a chick who is standing by herself. We start making out in thirty seconds. I waste zero fucking time. I find out that she lives on the Upper East side, then I say,

"Come on, let's go outside. Let's go."

And I start leading her outside. The way I'm leading her is brilliant. I'm drunk so I don't give a fuck and she just follows. Normally, sober, I'm more worried about whether she's following or not (which can manifest in behaviors like looking back to see if she is there, or walking slowly. These behaviors suck! I need to lead the way I drag my sister around. If I'm with my sister and we're going somewhere, I tell her where we're going then I just start walking. And if she's not behind me when I get there, I think wtf what's wrong with her for not keeping up? I would never in a billion years blame myself for "not leading right" or some gay bullshit like that. This is the attitude I need to have with all girls). We get outside, I say,

"Let's find a taxi. I want to see your place."

I grab her hand and pull her around, looking for a taxi. I don't see any free taxis and this girl is giving me all sorts of objections.

"No way, I can't leave. My friends are here. I can't go with you!"

I tell her to text her friends and tell them that she's had too much to drink and she had to leave. Keep looking for a taxi but I can't fucking find one! After two minutes she finally freaks the fuck out and leaves. Total time, about 4 minutes. Haha tried to pull her to a taxi to go back to her place and hook up after four minutes. Drunk me is very bold. Obviously we had no connection or comfort and so she bailed. Although, she may have actually gotten into a taxi if it was right outside the door. That would have been interesting to see.

Major fucking lesson here though, just go for it! Grab your balls and be fucking bold! This girl followed me to a taxi after I'd said 64 words and known her for 3 minutes. She did it because I led hard. When I look back at everything that's happened, I'm sure there are dozens if not hundreds of times I've missed a pull because I was too scared, too nervous, or thinking it's too early!

Drunk me doesn't think, he just does. I really need to transfer that quality over to sober me. I believe that if I start ramping up the intensity and pushing things harder, I'll get blown out a lot more, but I'll also learn to calibrate better, I'll get better at seeing those windows, and I'll end up getting laid a lot, lot more.

Notes

*If I was sober and trying to find the taxi, I would have had the cognitive capacity to change the situation a bit. I would have stopped looking for the taxi, backed up against a wall, pulled her in, started talking to her some, a bit of making out, and so forth. Two steps forward, one step back. Then after a few minutes of this, I would have flagged a taxi. I think that by making it so obvious I wanted the taxi right then and there I freaked her out a bit and scared her away.

_________________
Daily Field Reports and Thoughts on Game: www.OutinBlack.com


Top
 Profile  
 
PostPosted: Wed Jun 28, 2017 6:29 am 
Offline
Member of MPUA Forum
User avatar

Joined: Sat Apr 01, 2017 6:27 pm
Posts: 105
To begin, some very decent field report reading music. The thought has crossed my mind that I’m probably not meant to be hooking up with the most attractive woman. That is, as a 25 year old guy with virtually no money, connections or status, I’m paddling up-river. For a smoking hot 22 year old woman at her absolute prime to choose me over a 35 year old pulling down $250,000k a year living in Soho, it’s a stretch. I use this reasoning to tell myself that it’s natural to not be crushing it right now, there's not something inherently wrong with me.

I have another theory. Getting good at game equates to getting emotionally fucked so many times that you become immune to it. You learn to take complete control of your emotions, versus being at their whim. Fear is an emotion. Most guys are controlled by the fear of speaking to a woman, they lack control. However, I wasn’t emotionally fucked by that fear tonight, it was other things.

Other Things

My wingman who I most enjoy going out with came into the bar tonight and introduced me to a guy from out of town. He said they’re going to get a place together. This hurt because I like my wingman a lot and in the past I’ve expressed interest in living with him. So when he said that, I felt crummy. OK, deal with it.

Forty-five minutes later I chase a girl down on the street and open her. Initially it goes surprisingly well. She lives a few blocks away, I’m already seeing the potential to go home with her. She’s that level of pretty where I can just, just keep my shit together without getting into my head. We walk and talk, then we get to CVS. Earlier she said we should go shopping together. Now, she turns to me and says,

“Well nice speaking, got to go!”

And she runs into the store. Emotions of bewilderment, confusion, touch of anger, touch of humiliation. It seemed like this was a good thing we had going and then she ripped the carpet out from under me and I felt crummy again. Am I making myself sound like a whiny bitch by writing about these things? That’s not my intention. I could just write bullshit like,

Pimping it bro! Did so many approaches tonight dude! Did you see that hot girl look at me man!

But I’m expressing these things to show that game can hurt. However, I believe that by ripping off these bandaids now I'll gain great emotional control in the future. Also, if / when I get very good at this, I think it will also be interesting for guys to read these reports and see the progression and that it's not all smooth sailing. Game is a predominantly emotional skill. It will punish you over and over until you let go of all expectations and outcome dependence. It seems likely that the day I start hooking up with stunning women is the day I care so god damn little that it has no effect on me whether she stays or goes. An interesting paradox.

Also, it’s worth noting that when I fail to succeed my brain’s natural inclination is to go towards self-pity. Poor you, you have it so hard. I fight this bullshit with every ounce of mental power I have. I think that self-pity is one of the most pathetic, useless things in the world. It’s pure mental laziness. Any Rand has a great quote about pity,

“This is pity,” he [Howard Roark] thought, and then he lifted his head in wonder. He thought that there must be something terribly wrong with a world in which this monstrous feeling is called a virtue.”

Anyways. Although I did get emotionally fucked, it was still a productive night. Let’s have a look.

Massive Approaching

Maybe I talked to 15 girls, I don't think 20. At one point I stood in one spot close to the door and opened five girls in a row as they walked past. This had about a 0% success rate in keeping girls for more than 15 seconds. It seems to fail not even because of lack of game, but just the simple fact that girls going past are trying to get somewhere.

Ashley

Spoke to her for about 10 minutes, solid conversation. She was cute, flirty, touching me back. Her friends kept staring at me but they never tried to pull her away. In the end I elected to get her number. This was almost definitely the wrong move. If I really wanted success I should have stuck with her until I pulled or I absolutely couldn’t push the interaction any further. By bailing in the middle of our conversation I basically fucked things.

*Worth noting, the reason I left Ashley is that my wingman showed up. This is a recurring theme in game. I'll get to the venue first, open a few sets, one starts to go really well, then my wingman shows up. I enjoy him, I want to speak to him, and I usually choose to leave the girl to chill with my buddy. I've probably lost a pull or two from leaving these sets early, but I figure that if a guy takes the time to come out and meet up with me, I want to hang out with him.

Casie

Approached her and she had saucer eyes. Average attractive level, nothing special, so my brain allows me to be my normally awesome self. I throw a bunch of stuff at her and she tells me that I’m too confident. I say,

“Impossible. It’s a guy’s job to be as confident as possible. If he gets called cocky, that’s a compliment.”

By 5 minutes deep I’ve gone for the makeout 3 times but she keeps turning her head. I pull her outside the bar and try to make out 2 more times, no go. Her friend calls, we go inside to find her. I tell them about a bar around the corner, say we should go. They say no and that they're tired. I suggest,

“I’ll walk you guys home”

And I start to drag Casie out. But it doesn’t go over the way I hoped and the friend says no thanks, they'll take an Uber. Then she pulls Casie to the bathroom. Big lesson here is that I was very permission seeking in my leading. Instead of being strong and decisive, I was weak and wishy-washy. Next time I do this I’ll smile, say “let’s go” and start leading. I’m about 80% sure I lost this set because I didn’t lead hard enough and with enough conviction. It was borderline that I walked her home, took her to her room and fucked her.

_________________
Daily Field Reports and Thoughts on Game: www.OutinBlack.com


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 103 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7  Next

All times are UTC


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  

Can we be honest?

We want your email address. Let me send you the best seduction techniques ever devised... because they are really good.
close-link