fear of kino

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startthe Game
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Posted: Thu Aug 09, 2007 6:09 pm Post subject: fear of kino

i dont get this about myself but im afraid of kino. it gos down to the fear of rejection. what can i do if i cant even tap someone. like putting my arm around a girl is almost unthinkable

SouthernCross
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votes: 6

Posted: Thu Aug 09, 2007 7:37 pm Post subject:

This can't be a serious post Because if it is you're pretty pathetic Read this link and I recommend looking at the rest of this site below too [link]

Union_Jack
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Posted: Fri Aug 10, 2007 3:41 am Post subject:

SouthernCross wrote:

This can't be a serious post Because if it is you're pretty pathetic

Woah, take it easy there bro. I emphasize with this, as we're all in various stages of comfort with women and ourselves. There was a time in my life that I was scared enough of the opposite gender that I wouldn't even dream of touching them, even in a non-sexual way.

I think that if you are trying to get over the fear of touch, don't focus on touching women - give them a reason to touch you. Even if it's just a playful smack from neg you've thrown her. She'll come to you. Do it enough times, and you're bound to grow the confidence that you need to reach out there and kino everything she's got!

Women like to be touched, as do we. When you are engaging in kino escalation, enjoy it. It's for her as much as it is for you.

SouthernCross
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Posted: Fri Aug 10, 2007 5:40 am Post subject:

You're right Union Jack that was a bit harsh on Start the Game but he's got to understand without kino your game will fail 100% that site should help him understand why its so important

Mech
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votes: 2

Posted: Fri Aug 10, 2007 6:39 am Post subject:

Here are some suggestions of EASY kino situations. Force yourself to do some/all of these over and over until they feel more comfortable. Unlike approach anxiety, kino anxiety can be completely overcome and eventually disappear. 1) Talk to women in a loud environment. She will have trouble hearing you unless you either yell or talk close to her ear. Yelling is tacky by the way, and I have yet to find a woman who shys away from me if I lean in so she can hear me. Put your hand on her lower back (i.e., same height as her belly button) for at least 4 seconds as you talk to her. This will seem very natural to her, and not at all 'out of bounds' 2) If you ever have to weave your way through a crowded group of people, it's appropriate to gently push people out of the way (especially if it's a loud environment -- it's the equivalent of saying "excuse me"). This is definitely non-sexual contact, but it will get you comfortable with touching other people.

EvoJ
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Posted: Fri Aug 10, 2007 1:47 pm Post subject:

I don't know Mech, one of the biggest and most repeated rules about body language is that You don't lean in for Any reason early on. It shows that not only are You the one starting up the convo but your willing to come even further just so she can hear you. I say speak up enough so that You think she can hear you, if she can't then she will probably say "What?" and you motion Her to lean into you. Then you cheek to cheek it and tell her. This promotes instant closeness as well and giving her the chance to smell you (AND you to smell her). If you do this, remember to sound slightly annoyed that SHE didn't hear you when obviously everyone else could. I am going to a club tonight Sargin, I will try out both variations. (Your's leaning in and mine making her lean in) I will post a Field report about it tomorrow (Or monday depending).

Apollo
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Posted: Fri Aug 10, 2007 5:00 pm Post subject:

Dude, SouthernCross, why are all of your posts negative and harsh? Ease up. Help people, don't hurt. It isn't productive.

SouthernCross
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Posted: Fri Aug 10, 2007 9:51 pm Post subject:

Apollo wrote:

Dude, SouthernCross, why are all of your posts negative and harsh? Ease up.

Answer:
Because you touch yourself at night!

marudam
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Reputation: 4.3

Posted: Sun Aug 19, 2007 2:57 am Post subject:

For me.... I could start kino pretty easily if I am not thinking about sex or how hot she is. If think about playing a game... the I feel Kino becomes little difficult. May be I am too impatient.

Apollo
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votes: 3

Posted: Mon Aug 20, 2007 3:19 am Post subject:

Nah, you just have approach anxiety, just like most everyone. This is normal. Just work on confidence builders to the point that you KNOW that you are THE MAN. Then convince yourself that kino is a gift to her.

magicJ2007
MPUA Forum Addict
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votes: 2

Posted: Mon Aug 20, 2007 5:27 am Post subject:

Go to night clubs more , NIGHT CLUBS are the best place to practice and calibarate KINO TRUST ME . Magic J

Mech
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Posted: Mon Aug 20, 2007 7:27 am Post subject:

EvoJ wrote:

I don't know Mech, one of the biggest and most repeated rules about body language is that You don't lean in for Any reason early on. It shows that not only are You the one starting up the convo but your willing to come even further just so she can hear you.

I say speak up enough so that You think she can hear you, if she can't then she will probably say "What?" and you motion Her to lean into you. Then you cheek to cheek it and tell her. This promotes instant closeness as well and giving her the chance to smell you (AND you to smell her).

If you do this, remember to sound slightly annoyed that SHE didn't hear you when obviously everyone else could.

I am going to a club tonight Sargin, I will try out both variations. (Your's leaning in and mine making her lean in) I will post a Field report about it tomorrow (Or monday depending).

Absolutely true, but I'm just trying to offer him situations where kino will come natrually. I'll have to brush up on my body language stuff, but can't you still lean in a little as long as your feet/shoulders are "open" (i.e., not directly facing them)?.

Another idea is to lean in to say something, go for the kino, and then pretend to walk away. That sort of too close/too far thing is a pretty popular way of creating sexual tension if I recall correctly.

duck
Member of MPUA Forum
Reputation: 14.7

votes: 2

Posted: Mon Aug 20, 2007 2:22 pm Post subject:

The topic of leaning in is a bit over worried about. IMO It happens so often in a noisy place that it's almost invisible. I don't worry about it - then again I am hard of hearing in my right ear (anyone a shooter - WEAR HEARING PROTECTION!) so it's natural to me to lean in. I typically lean in tho with my body opened away from her - that way they only get the ear - do it 1 time - the first time and then they will come to you from then on.

DeezGunz23
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Reputation: 2.3

Posted: Tue Aug 28, 2007 1:18 am Post subject:

#1 def sounds like it would work, all of this stuff makes sense, why would a girl want to be yelled at? you cant have a good conversation when you are yelling at her, i def have to work on that, and the hand on the lower back would give me wood, but im not sure about her..... well the girl equivalent of wood, whatever that is

Mech wrote:

Here are some suggestions of EASY kino situations. Force yourself to do some/all of these over and over until they feel more comfortable. Unlike approach anxiety, kino anxiety can be completely overcome and eventually disappear.

1) Talk to women in a loud environment. She will have trouble hearing you unless you either yell or talk close to her ear. Yelling is tacky by the way, and I have yet to find a woman who shys away from me if I lean in so she can hear me. Put your hand on her lower back (i.e., same height as her belly button) for at least 4 seconds as you talk to her. This will seem very natural to her, and not at all 'out of bounds'

2) If you ever have to weave your way through a crowded group of people, it's appropriate to gently push people out of the way (especially if it's a loud environment -- it's the equivalent of saying "excuse me"). This is definitely non-sexual contact, but it will get you comfortable with touching other people.

Methuselah
PUA Forum Leader
Reputation: 120.9

votes: 30

Posted: Tue Aug 28, 2007 4:15 am Post subject:

SouthernCross wrote:

Apollo wrote:

Dude, SouthernCross, why are all of your posts negative and harsh? Ease up.

Answer:
Because you touch yourself at night!

Is this guy serious?

Anyway. On a more intelligent note. Don't be scared of rejection. You reject yourself by not trying. If you fail you fail, shit happens. If you don't at least try you already have lost the war.

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