Not kiss closing on First Date Leads to Friendzone?



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PostPosted: Sun Feb 19, 2017 11:37 pm 
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So I'm usually ok at kiss closing girls I want to kiss close on a first date. Today I messed up though - wasn't in a good place, couldn't find a good place, and although I could tell she was enjoying herself, she seems a bit on the prude side (already said she's looking for a relationship and no hookups). So I didn't try to create something out of nothing. At the end of the date we hugged :| I hate hugging....

Anyway, my question is, do you think this significantly increases my chances of being friend zoned? I've definitely heard of people not kissing until the second or even third date, but it seems to me that by not kissing her, I'm at a much greater risk of ending up in the friend zone. We hardly escalated - held hands for a bit and had my arm around her, but that's it.


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PostPosted: Sun Feb 19, 2017 11:41 pm 
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backIntheGame91 wrote:
So I'm usually ok at kiss closing girls I want to kiss close on a first date. Today I messed up though - wasn't in a good place, couldn't find a good place, and although I could tell she was enjoying herself, she seems a bit on the prude side (already said she's looking for a relationship and no hookups). So I didn't try to create something out of nothing. At the end of the date we hugged :| I hate hugging....

Anyway, my question is, do you think this significantly increases my chances of being friend zoned? I've definitely heard of people not kissing until the second or even third date, but it seems to me that by not kissing her, I'm at a much greater risk of ending up in the friend zone. We hardly escalated - held hands for a bit and had my arm around her, but that's it.
There's still a chance...don't worry too much.

How did you get on the subject of her looking for a relationship and no hooking up?


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 20, 2017 12:55 am 
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I asked her what she was looking for on Tinder. But I know that's just what girls say sometimes and often don't actually mean. Have totally slept with a gal or two who said something like that.


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 20, 2017 1:19 am 
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backIntheGame91 wrote:
I asked her what she was looking for on Tinder. But I know that's just what girls say sometimes and often don't actually mean. Have totally slept with a gal or two who said something like that.
Just some advice...don't ask what women are looking for because once they say it they are going to want to follow through with it. Act with intent and let her do the same. If she's attracted to you then she is more likely to follow your lead without you creating a frame for her.


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PostPosted: Wed Mar 01, 2017 11:44 am 
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In reply to the OP you won't automatically get friendzoned because you didn't kiss her on the first date.

Just don't worry about it because once you start over thinking you will struggle to find 'the right moment' (no such thing) for the kiss.

What leads to the friendzone is building an emotional bond without physical escalation.

And out of curiosity she must have asked you what you were looking for too right? What did you answer?


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PostPosted: Wed Mar 01, 2017 6:05 pm 
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If you're trying to kiss a girl because you don't want to get friend zoned and not because you genuinely want to kiss her than you're already on the path to being friend zoned. I've said this before and I'll say it again... It's not about the action, its about the vibe. You can get friend zoned immediately after a one night stand if the vibe isn't correct. Guys have girlfriends for months that they are kissing, hugging, fucking etc. And the girl still hits them with the " We should be friends" talk. So how much does kissing really mean?

Kissing only makes YOU feel validated which is a problem. When you kiss a girl because you want to kiss, and not because it'll make you feel better about where you stand with a girl this problem will disappear completely. You have to stop being outcome dependent and relying on something that involves another person for validation. Just chill. It's one date btw.. The girl will come around, learn to relax.

I can go months without making an escalation move and still not get friend zoned. Because i am the prize, i am the leader, and if any friend zone is going to be happening it will be because I made the decision. I'd laugh in the face of a girl that tried to say lets be friends and then kiss her immediately after.

It's all in your confidence.

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Last edited by Eddie Fews on Thu Mar 02, 2017 12:05 am, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Wed Mar 01, 2017 9:59 pm 
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backIntheGame91 wrote:
do you think this significantly increases my chances of being friend zoned?

No need to worry much. It's the first date.

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PostPosted: Wed Mar 01, 2017 11:25 pm 
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Khatib_Imron wrote:
backIntheGame91 wrote:
do you think this significantly increases my chances of being friend zoned?

No need to worry much. It's the first date.



This is terrible advice, lol.

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PostPosted: Mon Mar 13, 2017 12:55 am 
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In her mind she is now looking for a relationship, whether she meant it or not. A lot of women on tinder do say things like this because of the sex shaming they are given for sleeping around. You can try one more time but don't be surprised if she gets clingy.


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PostPosted: Mon Mar 13, 2017 1:36 am 
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I suppose I ended up getting friend zoned. It was weird - after our date she texted me saying she had a great time, and then the day after our date she added me on facebook and snapchat. Clearly positive signs.

2 days after our date, I sent her a cocky/funny joke which she laughed at. The next day she texted me early in the morning "I hope you have a great day :)". A day after that, I tried setting up a game of thrones date (we both like it, and she's behind in the series). She ignored it. 5 days later, I ask how her weekend was, which she responds. Next message, I ask what her sched is likefor the week. She ignores that as well.

So this is the point where I give up. I don't chase'em, I replace'em. Maybe she didn't like something about my facebook profile, because my snapchat is empty. For facebook, my profile pictures are mostly the same I use for Tinder, but there is one profile pic of me getting kissed on the cheeks by two chicks. I guess maybe she thinks that's not classy? I have no idea. Or she's just weird.


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PostPosted: Mon Mar 13, 2017 8:33 am 
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backIntheGame91 wrote:
So this is the point where I give up. I don't chase'em, I replace'em. Maybe she didn't like something about my facebook profile, because my snapchat is empty.


Don't be ridiculous dude. Women are interested in physical relations, not virtual ones.

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