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I have been rejected and/or lead on by every girl I've ever gone for and currently think I'm getting lead on. This has kinda discouraged me to keep continuing trying to date because I feel like something has to be wrong with me. If anything I want to focus on losing my virginity and have random sex, than date for the time being because its taken a huge toll on myself to try and date. But at the same time I would like to know about a dilemma I have.
I can approach girls and get their numbers and I've never gotten a fake number. I'll usually put my intentions out there and let them know I'm interested in getting to know them and ask them out on a date before I get their number. They seem interested at first and sometimes they will reply to my initial text to say they have my number or to start a conversation but then it pretty much dies from there. I've dated like 3 girls, but they never got anywhere, I get told I'm bf material by friends, and I get compliments on my looks and personality from time to time so I don't think I'm too horrible.
But if I'm not getting past getting their number then something is off. Sometimes a girl will even text me back a few days after my texts saying she got it and wants to meet up but then never replies again. The conversations even go great and the girls are responding well but then just stop replying for no apparent reason. I also listen to this subreddit and focus on putting my intentions out there by asking them on a date with specific details before I get their number so I'm not waiting days or weeks to ask them out.
Has anyone been in a similar situation that figured it out because I would really appreciate some advice for when I have better self esteem to keep trying.
Tldr; Can get numbers and talk to girls but cant get past that, set up dates early on instead of texting for days or weeks too, not sure where I'm going wrong but my motivation and self esteem are pretty bruised but I at least want to figure this out.
1. How old are you? (I'm guessing young, between 16-20)
2. How long have you been trying to get numbers? (I'm guessing within the last 2-3 months)
3. Are you physically escalating? (I'm guessing very little or not at all.)
Please correct or confirm.
Sorry, i was on vacation and didn't expect this post to be revived again.
1. correct, 16
2. correct, 2-3 months
3. correct, very little. During club environment i shoulder touch and cup their ears for them to hear me better. I heard this technique can show if she is complying
Now I'm going to give some advice that may go against the grain of some of the advice you have already received, as well as what you may already think:
Right now, at this young age, is not a time to be focusing SPECIFICALLY on pickup skills.
Right now, you want to be focusing on YOURSELF - developing a personality, understanding yourself better, and learning how to be self assured WITHOUT coming off like an asshole.
You're going to face a number of challenges at 16 that won't be there at 18+ - namely isolation locations, as well as most of the girls you're talking to simply not being ready for a sexual relationship.
Not only that, but you may struggle to find locations (outside of school) with a large number of girls to meet. And not only that, at 16 you're still VERY young and have a lot to inevitably learn.
Build your social circle. Invite people to groups and meetups. TALK to everyone. Learn to be fun, outgoing, engaging at ALL times. This is a skill - something you have to practice, over and over.
When you have learned to be fun, interesting, and outgoing, and have a naturally attractive personality, THEN I would say to focus on picking up girls. Then you would have the solid foundation for it.
But at 16? Pfft, I didn't lose my virginity until 19...and I'm sure a lot of guys on this forum are in the same boat. Seriously, don't worry about it. Be fun, engaging, outgoing, and focus on your schoolwork so you can get into college and worry about girls then. Trust me, you still have LOTS of time ahead of you. .