F Closed 1st date, How to Proceed?



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PostPosted: Tue Aug 22, 2017 6:55 pm 
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Met this girl on an app. Talked for 10 minutes or so, suggested we get together. Picked her up, drove around 15 minutes and chatted a little. Suggested we go to my place and have drinks and watch stuff. She said ok. We go to my place, a couple of drinks and F closed 3 times until the next morning.

Dropped her off the next morning. 2 days of no contact, and I noticed she deleted her account on the app we had met.

Called her last night, she sounded excited to talk to me. I think I know my mistake, which was chatting and talking for 10 minutes or so before I said to see each other tonight. She said she was busy with work and that she has an appointment for skin care after work. I insisted a little bit asking a few times (second mistake) and finally said ok, some other time and said bye.

Now, I think I know the 2 mistakes I made, and I think I should have waited for her to contact me.

So, what do you guys think and recommend I do at this point? Should I just wait for her to contact me? And in case she doesnt, when and how should I contact her again?

Thanks in advance.


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PostPosted: Tue Aug 22, 2017 7:37 pm 
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pprince wrote:
Dropped her off the next morning. 2 days of no contact, and I noticed she deleted her account on the app we had met.


Normal.


Quote:
Called her last night, she sounded excited to talk to me.



This is where I totally go against "the phone call". It's too much investment this early, and intrusive. And it's a great way to talk a woman out of hanging with you.

Quote:
I think I know my mistake, which was chatting and talking for 10 minutes or so before I said to see each other tonight. She said she was busy with work and that she has an appointment for skin care after work. I insisted a little bit asking a few times (second mistake) and finally said ok, some other time and said bye.



Your phone call was a disaster.

This is why I advise against phone calls for men who have trouble controlling their emotions (as you do). What happens is men let their emotions control them, in this case your complete fear of rejection. So you get caught in an anxiety loop and repeat yourself (insisting she meet you out repeatedly, which is needy behavior).

Quote:
Now, I think I know the 2 mistakes I made, and I think I should have waited for her to contact me.

So, what do you guys think and recommend I do at this point? Should I just wait for her to contact me? And in case she doesnt, when and how should I contact her again?

Thanks in advance.



Wait for her to text you back. And stop using phone calls with women, you have not trained yourself to control your emotions yet.

As I advised half a dozen times before, take a sticky note and tape it to your phone after writing this on it:

"Is this a negative emotion? Am I texting too much?"

Instead of the phone call, you should've sent this:

"Hey, It's Netflix and drinks tomorrow night. Come by when you're free."

I just got a "thank you" PM from a guy who used that exact line after my advice, and it rescued him from a bad date.

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PostPosted: Tue Aug 22, 2017 8:19 pm 
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Thanks Arch, that's what has been happening lately. If I like a girl and enjoy sex, I fuck it up by over contacting and stuff.

I hope I can fix this. Now, about this particular girl, do you recommend I text her if she doesn't text or call me?

Also, can you elaborate on what you say is normal when girls delete their account after hooking up?


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PostPosted: Tue Aug 22, 2017 8:56 pm 
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pprince wrote:
Thanks Arch, that's what has been happening lately. If I like a girl and enjoy sex, I fuck it up by over contacting and stuff.


Yep, happens to the best of them. It's just about training yourself.

Quote:
I hope I can fix this. Now, about this particular girl, do you recommend I text her if she doesn't text or call me?


In a week, maybe. Give her some space. She said she was busy, so let her get back to you.

Quote:
Also, can you elaborate on what you say is normal when girls delete their account after hooking up?


she found someone (you) and hooked up. Girls will take down their profiles for a variety of reasons after this.

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