Basic close ---- please help with advise



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PostPosted: Sat Feb 04, 2017 11:24 am 
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Joined: Fri Jun 07, 2013 3:34 pm
Posts: 14
Hi guys, I'm looking for advise on technicals, how to open and close and in general play the game.

So I met a girl tonight, she's nice looking not out of my league in that respect, I was sitting down at the ice rink (My daughter has lessons 2s a week and I have a skate ones a week for a few hours) and started chatting to what I thought was a Chinese girl but turned out to be American (I'm in the uk). She was all over me but I just messed it up and walked away. I looked bad and was sweating bad but could have closed.

This is the conversation (I'll try my best to remember in correctly):

Me - hi are you Chinese ?
Her - no I'm American
M - sorry I was in China and America late last year, where are you from?
H- Louisiana, South
M- I've been to new year and love it, have you been?
H- yea it's great.
M- why are you here
H- studying
M- can I ask how old areyou (had to check these Chinese look young!)
H- How old do I look I won't be offended
M - 23
H- I'm 26
M- I was 28 last months.
M- what are u studying
H - medicine, eye doctor
M - have been skating long, do you get lessons
H - since I was 8, I used to compete
H- world jr championships
M - it the like the thing before you go to the Olympics
M - like go figure ( I child's skating film)
H- yea kinda
H - I would skate everyday before 2 hours
M- I'm here with daughter (pointed her out) she's 9/10 I don't look old enough do I
H- no
M- I would like to bring her in the mornings in the summer as I enjoy sailing, have u ever been I bet you don't have much water in the south, we have lots here.
H- sealing (didn't hear be correctly)
M-sailing, there are yacht clubs that race around boys in the sea. When the weather is nice I don't want to be in here. I'm not a jr worlds champion but I love it.
M- where in china are you from?
H- Shenzhen
M - I love Shenzhen I buy product from there and sell on ebay USA and uk/Europe.
H- I have family there.

( the ice was cleaned and everyone got back on, I'm a total pussy (not long single after few years) so figured I wasn't going to ask for her number)

M- are you going to show me a few jumps?
H- no I'm leaving now
M- are you heading out partying?
H- no I have work in the morning.
M- I'm not much of a drinker

We had a little more chit chat she said she try's to come every Friday so I'll see her again, she was all over me with her body langue and tones even her face was so enthusiastic, I wanted to play cool so just kinda walked off, I didn't no what to do. She thought I was hitting on her and was going to ask her out.

So the questions are:

What do I do when I see her next her how do I play it?
What open / close should I use?
Step by step guide if possible, thanks!

Help please !!!!!!


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PostPosted: Sat Feb 04, 2017 3:43 pm 
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The Grand Puba
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Joined: Mon Feb 24, 2014 11:17 pm
Posts: 5800
Location: Los Angeles
What you did wrong here is question her to death and missed out on opportunities to allow her to expand on her answers. You could have dug so much deeper on multiple things. You also had multiple opportunities to show that you were impressed with things about her which would have made things easier to show that you found her attractive.

Here's a goal when you have a conversation with a woman: Get her to talk about how she feels about anything that she talks about. It allows her to care about what she's saying. If she cares about what she's saying, it makes the conversation interesting for her.

Also, you need to communicate/imply that you find her attractive.


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PostPosted: Sat Feb 04, 2017 5:06 pm 
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Joined: Fri Jun 07, 2013 3:34 pm
Posts: 14
I odd question her to death and also talked too much but I'm pleased I didn't just ignore her lol.

I thought the point was to not be impressed and to make her think I'm not interested? Everyone wants what they can have.

I tried to demonstrate higher value by not being a party dude and speaking about sailing. If I'm honest I have no fucking clue!

That's great advise, I'm sure there's a line somewhere I don't want to be to sensitive... I think?

So the next I see her she'll be put her boots on or skating and possibly with a friend.
I'm think ill wave and leave her for awhile, then I'll give her friend attention if the time is right before asking for her number, is that about correct??

I need to work on questions to chat about before I close.
I'll tell her I work across the street from her (Which I do but didn't tell her) and ask about coffee at lunch ??

Or I could go all heavy as bring up skating together she said she would like to do pairs, I'm not good enough at skating and it's a bit gay to could be a lot of effort but possible ok for a couple of dates before we head for a drink or meal ???

How quick do I close when I'm chatting?? sometimes I find it best to get it out the way first nfa build report after.


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PostPosted: Sat Feb 04, 2017 5:48 pm 
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The Grand Puba
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Joined: Mon Feb 24, 2014 11:17 pm
Posts: 5800
Location: Los Angeles
Extradrill wrote:
I odd question her to death and also talked too much but I'm pleased I didn't just ignore her lol.

I thought the point was to not be impressed and to make her think I'm not interested? Everyone wants what they can have.

I tried to demonstrate higher value by not being a party dude and speaking about sailing. If I'm honest I have no fucking clue!

That's great advise, I'm sure there's a line somewhere I don't want to be to sensitive... I think?

So the next I see her she'll be put her boots on or skating and possibly with a friend.
I'm think ill wave and leave her for awhile, then I'll give her friend attention if the time is right before asking for her number, is that about correct??

I need to work on questions to chat about before I close.
I'll tell her I work across the street from her (Which I do but didn't tell her) and ask about coffee at lunch ??

Or I could go all heavy as bring up skating together she said she would like to do pairs, I'm not good enough at skating and it's a bit gay to could be a lot of effort but possible ok for a couple of dates before we head for a drink or meal ???

How quick do I close when I'm chatting?? sometimes I find it best to get it out the way first nfa build report after.
The PUA marketing machine will tell you it's better to act like you're not interested because they know that guys fear rejection if they put themselves out there. It's only effective in limited situations and those situations usually require you to have some perceived social value.

Here's the reality of most people. They want to feel special. The desire to feel special will make them want to sell themselves to you. You telling her about your sailing and not being a party guy doesn't make her feel special. You being impressed with her accomplishments will make her feel special. You allowing her to impress you will make her feel special.

Personally, I don't like the idea of you showing an interest in the friend unless you show interest in both of them equally at the same time.

Just talk to the girl and be normal. Don't worry about coming up with questions, just learn to stay on the same subject and get her to open up about anything she feels about the subject. I would have probably gotten a 5-10 minute conversation of an Asian girl in Louisiana alone and would have thrown in that because she's cute it couldn't be that bad/must've made it easy/probably made her popular or something along those lines and then got her number so we could go out sometime.

Avoid an activity date and dinner if it's a first date. Find someplace where you two can sit together and talk and build some sexual tension. Then invite her over to your place for whatever excuse you can use to invite her over to your place.


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