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PostPosted: Sun Aug 18, 2013 2:10 pm 
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Joined: Wed May 22, 2013 6:25 pm
Posts: 208
Hey guys!
So my problem is that my overall lifestyle is pretty much shit. Im really really unhappy with it and i dont know how to change it or where to start. When i see some of my friends, they are living the life! They are always on the go, have no time for short-term dates and doing all the fun and crazy stuff you should do while you´re young (im 21).
Now let me tell you how my life is:

-Wake up in the morning at 6:30
-Go to work
-Come back home, watch TV
-Go to bed again
Weekend:
-Go to the mall or to the city for a few hours
-Visit family
-Go home watch TV
-Go to bed
Sundays are really really bad because i spend the whole fucking day sitting on my bed and mull about all the thinks i dont do and why im so unhappy. I would even say its quite close to some sort of depression on sundays...

Thats all i do. All the year... Sometimes (lets say once a month) i go to a bar with a friend or visit them.
I dont go out at all. I dont even know with who because it seems like everybody around me has such a busy and great lifestyle they dont even have time for me very often. I dont want this boring and rather sad lifestyle anymore. I want to be fucking busy all the time and finally become more interesting and known and more importantly...happy! The problem is im really not the party guy. I dont like drinking and partying and staying up all night. I never was that guy...
Do you have any motivation for me? Where to start, what to do?


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PostPosted: Sun Aug 18, 2013 5:15 pm 
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The Coach
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Joined: Sun Jun 19, 2011 7:44 am
Posts: 4170
Location: Chicago, IL
Quote:
Hey guys!
So my problem is that my overall lifestyle is pretty much shit. Im really really unhappy with it and i dont know how to change it or where to start. When i see some of my friends, they are living the life! They are always on the go, have no time for short-term dates and doing all the fun and crazy stuff you should do while you´re young (im 21).
Now let me tell you how my life is:

-Wake up in the morning at 6:30
-Go to work
-Come back home, watch TV
-Go to bed again
Weekend:
-Go to the mall or to the city for a few hours
-Visit family
-Go home watch TV
-Go to bed
Sundays are really really bad because i spend the whole fucking day sitting on my bed and mull about all the thinks i dont do and why im so unhappy. I would even say its quite close to some sort of depression on sundays...

Thats all i do. All the year... Sometimes (lets say once a month) i go to a bar with a friend or visit them.
I dont go out at all. I dont even know with who because it seems like everybody around me has such a busy and great lifestyle they dont even have time for me very often. I dont want this boring and rather sad lifestyle anymore. I want to be fucking busy all the time and finally become more interesting and known and more importantly...happy! The problem is im really not the party guy. I dont like drinking and partying and staying up all night. I never was that guy...
Do you have any motivation for me? Where to start, what to do?
Stop making excuses for why you can't do the things that you want to do and start doing them. Learn as you go. You will fail but you will fail moving forward. Just keep going.


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PostPosted: Sun Aug 18, 2013 5:21 pm 
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Joined: Wed Jul 17, 2013 1:00 pm
Posts: 461
Location: kIlladelphia
I get into this mindset sometimes as well. I take a step back and evaluate the situation. Not everyone has something going on all the time honestly. Just say 'yes,' to everything.

For example, my buddy hit me up to go out on the town last night. I was not very into going out (beat up from night before). After a second thought, said 'fuck it' and just pulled myself up out of a minor comfort zone and took him up on his offer. Turned out to be a new experience and awesome night! Met some very cool dudes who I can undoubtedly go out with another time.

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PostPosted: Mon Aug 19, 2013 11:13 am 
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Joined: Thu Mar 21, 2013 10:40 am
Posts: 5
It's really good and helpful..Keep sharing these kinds of posts.

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PostPosted: Tue Aug 20, 2013 10:48 am 
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Joined: Thu Aug 15, 2013 10:20 pm
Posts: 5
Since you need to hear this multiple times, stop making excuses. Pick up a new hobby to replace watching TV.

Suggestions:

-Join a gym.
-Take an improv comedy class.
-Take a dancing class. (Great way to meet women as well)
-Develop a new hobby that you "always wanted to do" but never have.
-Read more.
-Get a membership at an indoor rock climbing facility.
-Approach 10 women a day.
-Force yourself out of your comfort zone once a day.


The key is to develop yourself, and not waste your life away. You're 21, embrace your youth and enjoy life. Don't waste it feeling sorry for yourself and watching TV. TV is shit.


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PostPosted: Tue Aug 20, 2013 11:50 am 
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English Muffin
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Joined: Wed Sep 10, 2008 5:40 pm
Posts: 5689
Quote:
Hey guys!
So my problem is that my overall lifestyle is pretty much shit. Im really really unhappy with it and i dont know how to change it or where to start. When i see some of my friends, they are living the life! They are always on the go, have no time for short-term dates and doing all the fun and crazy stuff you should do while you´re young (im 21).
Now let me tell you how my life is:

-Wake up in the morning at 6:30
-Go to work
-Come back home, watch TV
-Go to bed again
Weekend:
-Go to the mall or to the city for a few hours
-Visit family
-Go home watch TV
-Go to bed
Sundays are really really bad because i spend the whole fucking day sitting on my bed and mull about all the thinks i dont do and why im so unhappy. I would even say its quite close to some sort of depression on sundays...

Thats all i do. All the year... Sometimes (lets say once a month) i go to a bar with a friend or visit them.
I dont go out at all. I dont even know with who because it seems like everybody around me has such a busy and great lifestyle they dont even have time for me very often. I dont want this boring and rather sad lifestyle anymore. I want to be fucking busy all the time and finally become more interesting and known and more importantly...happy! The problem is im really not the party guy. I dont like drinking and partying and staying up all night. I never was that guy...
Do you have any motivation for me? Where to start, what to do?
Haha look at the high light part.

You basically work Mon-fri then on weekends you day game.

Not a great lifestyle.

You forgot to mention that your job has vacation time, what would you do with 20 days of vacation?

Daygame or do some stuff you wanna do?

Getting into PUA at a young age is bad for you, and ironically bad for your game.

Sort out your shit. No excuses, I went sky diving with my girlfriend on Sunday, BOW TO ME.

Before game ,I'm lucky I travelled most of Europe so I have legit stories,experiences, memories and pics.

Take a long hard look in the mirror and sort out your shit, no excuses.

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PostPosted: Sat Aug 24, 2013 7:20 am 
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Joined: Wed May 22, 2013 6:25 pm
Posts: 208
Quote:
You forgot to mention that your job has vacation time, what would you do with 20 days of vacation?
Its not like that...Its not like i never do anything. I traveled a lot. I been to most european countries, i been to Dubai, Qatar, Saudi Arabia, Los Angeles, Las Vegas, Africa...
I did some things i will never forget, i drove my first Ferrari when i was 18. I did some amazing film and photography projects with exclusive Supercars most people wil never even see on the road, im friends with members of a royal family...
Ive seen beautiful things, ive seen real bad things.
So its not like my overall life is boring.
But i dont see how all this can help me HERE AND NOW. I know what i did and i know it was amazing but lets face it: Nobody wants to hear and know that shit...Because my passion and hobbies and stories are boring and unreal to most people. They rather like to hear stuff like "I went partying in spain, and i was so fucking drunk i jumped into the pool from my balcony"...But i dont have stories like that.


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PostPosted: Sat Aug 24, 2013 8:57 am 
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English Muffin
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Joined: Wed Sep 10, 2008 5:40 pm
Posts: 5689
Who's says that that nobody wants to hear those stories?!

You just assumed that, just don't do it in a braggy way, don't be ashamed of who you are.

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PostPosted: Sat Aug 24, 2013 8:57 am 
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English Muffin
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Joined: Wed Sep 10, 2008 5:40 pm
Posts: 5689
Who's says that that nobody wants to hear those stories?!

You just assumed that, just don't do it in a braggy way, don't be ashamed of who you are.

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PostPosted: Sat Aug 24, 2013 11:30 am 
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Joined: Wed May 22, 2013 6:25 pm
Posts: 208
Im not ashamed of who i am. I know that im fucking awesome and that i have seen and done things most people will never. But i only see it for myself.
I have never seen anybody (not anybody lets say any GIRL) who was really interested in my stories. If i tell them i drive around in Ferraris and Bugattis they probably think i have a small dick because i like supercars and if i tell them i met the royal family of a small arab country they probably think im a creep or some sort of terrorist...

But you are right thats what i ASSUME...

I just want... i dont know....i want other people to spend time with me, i want friends to contact me i want to do fun crazy things. I just dont know how to change it. I never have this feeling like i need some time for myself. If there where people who would like to spend time with me or who are interested in me and my life i would go out every day! 24/7.
But i just feel like nobody would ever ask me to come out or even ask how i feel. Sometimes i wonder what would happen if i just disappeared...
See what i mean...Thats not attractive at all...


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PostPosted: Sat Aug 24, 2013 3:01 pm 
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Joined: Wed Sep 28, 2011 11:11 am
Posts: 100
I can understand that you may not have a story telling skills, thus nobody is interested in your (quite awesome I believe - I like cars) stories.

What I cannot undestand why you do not have any friends to go out with, or do some sport/fun things? To me, building a lifestyle like you describe (travel, drink, do anything interesting on weekends) is just a matter of having friends and saying YES when they ask you to do something.

Why you don't have friends?


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PostPosted: Sat Aug 24, 2013 5:06 pm 
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Joined: Wed May 22, 2013 6:25 pm
Posts: 208
Quote:
Why you don't have friends?
I wouldnt say i dont have ANY friends. Of course i have a few friends. But im not looking for any excuses here, its true i dont have that many friends and social contacts.
The reason for that? Im not sure. I guess it all started years and years back. I always was a mother´s boy. My mom is the best mom in the world so she always took care of me. When things in school went bad, i had my mother, when someone was mean to me as a kid, i had my mother. So what does a mother do? She tries to protect her kid from ANYTHING thats bad or might hurt her child.
In mid-school (between 11 and 18 years old) i had many friends. But only IN school. I never met up with friends after school. It always was the way it it now. Going to school. Going home to my mom, thats it. Maybe i always felt like i have to be there for my mom because i am everything she has. My parents broke up when i was a Baby. My mom did not have any new partner since then so all she had was me. We have us. And my mom has always been my best friend and SHE actually is the person who did and still does all that amazing stuff with me. She is a really cool and modern and young thinking mom i hear that all the time.
To a certain point in life it was okay i guess, i never felt unhappy or something...
But then you just get this feeling (and if you have not experienced this feeling i can tell you that its a bad bad bad feeling!!) that something is wrong here! Everybody around you has friends and everybody around you gets girlfriends. You just want social contact and of course naturally sexual contact with other human beings and all you do is sit at home day for day doing nothing.
Now the good story starts here: One day this girl from work (of course work since i dont go anywhere else really) comes into my life. I fall in love with her. Im 20 years old have NO EXPERIENCE with girls AT ALL. Of course i have no idea how to approach her how to talk to her or anything. I tell her that i love her. The never ending story begins! Please check out my other threats for that... Anyways the good thing about it was that at the fucking age of 20 i get my first lovesickness...I stop to eat i stop to drink without even knowing it. I lost 50 fucking pounds in one year just because of this girl. In this one year my whole life changed! I lost weight, i got a great car, i look fantastic now! Like really! I got confident as fuck everybody sees me with different eyes now, all the girls from work like me now, i can finally wear those amazing clothes i always wanted to wear (im really into fashion...). So i am now the girl getting guy i always wanted to be. But only from the outside. The social problems are still there and dont fit my new personality AT ALL. But its so hard fixing those social problems i dont know where to start or how to start.
Let me tell you this: If i had some real good friends and a nice girlfriend who loves me i would probably be the happiest man i can be, the rest is already there...


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PostPosted: Sat Aug 24, 2013 7:15 pm 
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Joined: Thu Aug 15, 2013 3:12 am
Posts: 45
Listen man... Even though you have experiences traveling, meeting royal families, seeing stuff. Great! You have expanded your horizon through traveling which something I personally would love to experience as much as you did.

The second thing is man up... seriously... man up... If you want something to do, review yourself, and think what do you like to do? Do you like art, lifting weights, dance, martial arts? the list could go on...

Find something to do. Don't just sit there and complain. You think PUA seriously sat down and complained how good they have become? They had to do lots of shit work, humiliate themselves, learned a lot of being a failure to become where they are today.

Even I am new to this stuff, and I try at least and learn by going out and figure out how to become better.

The whole point is forget about your friends, or having a girlfriend. Focus first what you like to do, have a goal/dream and work hard for it, but smart. No one likes people who is emo, depressed or angry all the time, so man up!

Try and create your own social circle (read more about it if you are new to it). It could be seriously be rewarding in long term!


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PostPosted: Sat Aug 24, 2013 7:44 pm 
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Joined: Wed Sep 28, 2011 11:11 am
Posts: 100
+1 for creating a new social circle.

From my experience the best way to build interesting life is to get friends that will enjoy the activities with you. You must firstly build the circle. Just identify people get on with at work and go out with them! Go get some good food if you don't like drinking. Explore every freakin restaurant in your city. Go to see some music. Try every sport possible in your city: climbing, swimming, golf, pool. Do things with your new friends, suggest new activities, places.


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PostPosted: Sun Aug 25, 2013 11:14 am 
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Joined: Wed May 22, 2013 6:25 pm
Posts: 208
Thanks guys! I will try my best to change!
I came such a long hard way, i worked so hard to get to the point where im at right now and i know i CAN take it to the next level now. I dont want to be one of those people who talk about doing things. Im willing to change my life.
But i think its a good idea to set small goals first.


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