Quote:
Why you don't have friends?
I wouldnt say i dont have ANY friends. Of course i have a few friends. But im not looking for any excuses here, its true i dont have that many friends and social contacts.
The reason for that? Im not sure. I guess it all started years and years back. I always was a mother´s boy. My mom is the best mom in the world so she always took care of me. When things in school went bad, i had my mother, when someone was mean to me as a kid, i had my mother. So what does a mother do? She tries to protect her kid from ANYTHING thats bad or might hurt her child.
In mid-school (between 11 and 18 years old) i had many friends. But only IN school. I never met up with friends after school. It always was the way it it now. Going to school. Going home to my mom, thats it. Maybe i always felt like i have to be there for my mom because i am everything she has. My parents broke up when i was a Baby. My mom did not have any new partner since then so all she had was me. We have us. And my mom has always been my best friend and SHE actually is the person who did and still does all that amazing stuff with me. She is a really cool and modern and young thinking mom i hear that all the time.
To a certain point in life it was okay i guess, i never felt unhappy or something...
But then you just get this feeling (and if you have not experienced this feeling i can tell you that its a bad bad bad feeling!!) that something is wrong here! Everybody around you has friends and everybody around you gets girlfriends. You just want social contact and of course naturally sexual contact with other human beings and all you do is sit at home day for day doing nothing.
Now the good story starts here: One day this girl from work (of course work since i dont go anywhere else really) comes into my life. I fall in love with her. Im 20 years old have NO EXPERIENCE with girls AT ALL. Of course i have no idea how to approach her how to talk to her or anything. I tell her that i love her. The never ending story begins! Please check out my other threats for that... Anyways the good thing about it was that at the fucking age of 20 i get my first lovesickness...I stop to eat i stop to drink without even knowing it. I lost 50 fucking pounds in one year just because of this girl. In this one year my whole life changed! I lost weight, i got a great car, i look fantastic now! Like really! I got confident as fuck everybody sees me with different eyes now, all the girls from work like me now, i can finally wear those amazing clothes i always wanted to wear (im really into fashion...). So i am now the girl getting guy i always wanted to be. But only from the outside. The social problems are still there and dont fit my new personality AT ALL. But its so hard fixing those social problems i dont know where to start or how to start.
Let me tell you this: If i had some real good friends and a nice girlfriend who loves me i would probably be the happiest man i can be, the rest is already there...