Body Language the key to Natural Game


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PostPosted: Wed Jul 21, 2010 10:43 am 
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Science of Natural Game is now taking questions guys!

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Ok Body Language is a huge topic and so this is going to take me a few weeks to finish this thread and I still will only be scratching the tip of the iceberg on this one. I will constantly be going back editing and adding as things come to me, so you may want reread here and there and pay attention to the last edit date.

There are a few books I feel every pick up artist should read. I am sure there are quite a few more I need to read but those have been the most helpful to me.

The Definitive Book on Body Language- Allan Pease
What Every Body is Saying- Joe Navarro
Undercover Sex Signals- Leil Lowndess
Love Signals- David Givens

Your body language matters as much as hers. If you are uncomfortable in a conversation she will be, this is why confidence is so key, as human beings we tend to feed off/copy the body language of the people we are speaking with. That body language in turn makes us feel exactly as the body language we have shown, learning a good confident pose and practicing it(always have good posture, if you don’t stand like your confident you will never be confident) I promise it will make you feel more confident. People are just naturally more comfortable with someone who is comfortable, and a confident person is always comfortable.

In body language there are two things a person is and that is Comfortable or
Uncomfortable. That is the basics of body language. Either that person is comfortable or uncomfortable pretty damn simple.

In courtship there are some additional signs that we as men need to pay attention to. There are some rules to body language pretty general just about everyone has them.

1. Clusters, these signals need to be put in clusters one signal could be one thing and another means something. Be very careful what you choose to listen to, make no mistake the subconscious talks through body language far more than through sound.
2. Context, sometimes we don't realize that things must be put in context. I.E. A girl has her arms crossed(Discomfort) because she is cold but has a genuine smile and bobbly head with a tipped head.
3. Continuity-Consistency, make sure there is continuity in these signals, you need to know when to change the topic in a uncomfortable situation.
4. Be optimistic, notice the good and the bad signs. Don't focus on the negative. There may be plenty of positive signs you are missing.
5. Be observant notice things and you stand out more(let her know how it feels), I know when someone is lying to me in a general conversation.

We will structure this with some basics. Than give a general understanding of body language(actual body language descriptions and comfort levels with them). Than we will put it all together using examples through out the thread. Than we will go over special courtship ones. This thread will be littered with little gems here and there I promise and it should get better with each edit.

Those are the rules we are starting with give me some more solid rules and we will add them.

Ok so there are some basic parts to the body.

1. Face(lots of details on just the face).
2. Head position
3. Neck
4. Arms
5. Hands
6. Torso
7. Legs
8. Feet.

Let’s get started on general body language. There are things we know naturally, things we feel but we let our minds disagree with them. Women pay a bit more attention to it with their intuition. Their ability to read body language is natural, they are wired that way so that they can read a child’s needs. As I discussed there are really only two things that a person can be and that is comfortable or uncomfortable. Those are the two signs that tell you to stay and conversate, change the topic, or just move on.

A couple of points. The general human reaction is not FLIGHT OR FIGHT. It is Freeze, Flight, or Fight. In a uncomfortable situation people tend to freeze before they want to leave. Everyone freezes for a second, it is a primal instinct. Predators focus on movement that is where the freeze comes about.

If a girl is stagnant and motionless she is not a character in this conversation and either you need to catch her attention or move on. Keep in mind that a girl may start out like this as a lot of girls are very shy, if you are talking to her for more than a minute and nothing changes you should bounce or find some way to grab her attention.

If you have a girl that is interested they tend to begin to practice ISOPRAXISM, this is where they copy your body language. A stranger can copy your body movement. I like to carry chap stick with me everywhere. I apply it if my target puts it on and they generally notice and start to like you, you guys are alike. I also just apply chap stick here and there for purposes of finding out who is attracted to me. If you apply it you may notice another girl applying lipstick or chap stick. If you are already talking and she copies your body language, you guys are falling in sync together a very good sign in courtship. Copying their body language can make them comfortable on a subconscious level great tactic to use once there is a little bit of interest. I once seen a girl obviously uncomfortable in a club with what was going on she had her arms crossed and was slouching. I walked up and stood next to her and crossed my arms and said can I have a bad time with you. Actually it worked, I found out she was pissed at her friends and started a solid conversation.

If you make eye contact with a girl and she looks away and then back a little later you already have an invitation for approach, but if your are still nervous let her catch you staring something mundane if she looks over at it it is a clear sign she is interested in what you are interested in, which means she is interested in you.

Man I have so much to add.


Last edited by poeticlyskuac on Thu Jul 22, 2010 9:01 am, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 21, 2010 10:44 am 
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Face

Face is a huge topic just in the face you have a huge selection of things to look for: Eyes, Eye brows, Lips, Mouth, Nose, and Forehead.

Face Coloration

Look for red hues, sometimes girls may not do much else but blush(shy), a lot of time this starts with the tops of their ears(nice little conversation bit actually). A girl will start to blush when she likes you this is impossible to control and every girl gives herself away with this.

Eyes

The window to the soul as they say these are my favorite part to read. It is easiest to feel how they feel when you look into their eyes.

Strong Eye Contact is very favorable it normally means you are in great shape when it is accompanied by some other positive signals(smile). Strong eye contact happens very rarely with a stranger, so if a good looking girl makes eye contact with you she is likely open for approach. Some girls are very shy and most girls look away as soon as you notice them. They don't want to be the creepy person just like you don't want to. That said if you watch them for an extra minute or so she will look back if she is interested. At that point she WANTS you to approach. This usually occurs in a social area.

GEM: Sometimes the girl will accompany the eye contact with a smile or a submissive look down away from you( to hide) or just down to not be seen(we still have natural thing where we can't see them they can't see us) it is a very shy move, I actually notice this 5 times or so every time I work. This is probably the most easy to see attraction invitation that everyone of us miss. Strong eye contact, submissive head movement(looking down), and slight grin, that is three signals right there a cluster as I refer to them. Sometimes they will even accompany this with preening in which case they definitely find you physically attractive.

Eyes alone have a few topics we will discuss.

Blink rate- Rapid Blink rate is a sign of several things including attraction. It can mean they are lying or they may even have a naturally rapid blink rate(very rare).
Rapid blink rate in general means they are excited, what ever is going on they are excited, that can be positive and negative. Un/Comfortable

Dilated eyes- Dilate eyes are a good thing once again this means they are excited generally it is a very positive sign that they are excited by you with good eye contact. Un/Comfortable

Glossy eyes- Very good sign generally called bedroom eyes with dilated eyes accompanying them. Could mean they will cry or have cried recently. Un/Comfortable

Smiley eyes- This one is more difficult to explain but go look in a mirror and do a tight lip fakes smile and look at your eyes it will have different look to them. Then go do a genuine smile and look at your eyes, you will be smiling with your eyes. Comfortable

Eyes Closed- If the eyes are closed for extended periods of time they are usually trying to block you out and they are Uncomfortable.

Eyes looking away- Where are their eyes looking if they are looking for escape routes(exits, friends, distractions), if they are not looking at some things attention grabbing they are definitely bored or Uncomfortable.

Eyebrows/Forehead

Eyebrows are very simple either they look uncomfortable or they don’t.

Raised eyebrows- These are generally welcoming eye brows, a great smile accompanying them will generally mean a approach is plausible. Comfortable

Furrowed Eyebrows- These are normally angry or giving a strange look. Generally any time they have these eyebrows they are uncomfortable. Uncomfortable

Straight Eyebrows- Normally they are pretty comfortable.

Forehead Smooth- Generally you want a smooth forehead anything else is bad. Uncomfortable

Forehead crinkled- Generally means they are Uncomfortable, could be confused, or upset.

Lips/Mouth

Lips and mouth have a lot to it there is so much to read into them and these things can say a lot about the conversation you are having.

Tight lips- Tight lips are generally bad they are consciously holding their lips closed. Even during a smile this is bad. A muscle is tightened. Uncomfortable

Slightly open lips- Generally they are comfortable There is no stress.

Corners of the mouth- Which way are they pointed if they are pointed up(Comfortable) they are smiling truly if they are pointing down(Uncomfortable) it is a bad sign.

Mouth slightly open- If their mouth is slightly open it is a good thing. You do want a loose and relaxed jaw something saying they are comfortable with the situation. Comfortable

Tongue protruding- If the tongue is protruding it is a bad sign you don’t want a girl sticking their tongue out yet. Generally Uncomfortable.

Swollen lips- Some times girls will do pouting lips like a 5 year old girl It is a sign they are uncomfortable.

Head position/Neck

Head position is very simple as well.

Head position up- Looking up and looking snobbish is easy to figure out they are being snooty. If looking away. Uncomfortable

Head down- Generally looking down is a submissive signal and is very good. May show shame. Comfortable

Head turned- Generally is very good they are normally interested in what you are saying, this happens so often it is ridiculous. Comfortable

Exposed Neck- If they are willing to expose their neck just like with dogs it is a submissive move, they are giving you their vulnerability. Must be making eye contact. Comfortable

Hidden Neck- Normally there isn’t trust yet. Uncomfortable

Turtle neck- This is when they almost hide their head in their shoulders. Normally they are shy. Uncomfortable but not necessarily bad.

Nose

Pay attention to the nostrils too they tell a separate story. They will give you their breathing patterns are they regular or what. Look for Comfortable breathing. Sighs can mean disagreement.

Flared nostrils mean they are volatile they are sucking in more oxygen to fight. Stay away from any men doing this.

Extra notes: Bobble head is an extremely good thing. You want to see this, a girl that is laughing genuinely at your jokes will have a giggly looking head just like a little girl. Likely head tipped up and mouth slightly open. At this point you have her pegged probably time for a little elevation, perhaps moving closer or kino.


I will add some more soon.

LOL already had more to add.


Last edited by poeticlyskuac on Thu Jul 22, 2010 8:34 am, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 21, 2010 10:22 pm 
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Since its the thing I struggle the most with I would like personally to thanks you for taking time to post this thread. And I am just the single person, I am sure this will help hundreds of forum members. Keep it up :wink:


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PostPosted: Thu Jul 22, 2010 8:09 am 
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Ok Now onto the legs and torso. Believe it or not the legs are the most honest of all parts of the body. They reveal a lot about comfort. Torso does as well and it is probably the simplest thing to notice.

Legs/Feet

Legs and feet are very very basic. They tell a simple story do they look like they want to get away or that they want to stay, very simple. They are comfortable and willing to deal with the situation or they won't.

Standing

Pay very close attention to the feet, also girls love if you compliment their shoes. Look where her toes are pointed, if they are pointed at you you are the most interesting person for her. Normally it will be one leg back balanced. If her toe is pointed elsewhere her interest at this particular moment is not you. If her toe is pointed at an exit, it is a subconscious sign for you to save face and leave.

If she has a wide stance she is likely comfortable but slightly territorial(trying to take up more space, alpha males use this naturally). Careful she may have a bitch shield.

If she has a close stance she could be unconfident, don't read as much into a close stance, most of the time it is very comfortable for them at this time(more on this later).

If you are standing next to them and they move their feet away you probably have someone uncomfortable your going to need to check into their comfort level what did you say, or do(perhaps jumped in her bubble to soon).

If they are willing to let their feet near you than you are in good standing. They definitely aren't afraid of you, in fact quite comfortable. Very good sign.

If she has her legs crossed while she is standing she is not going to run(comfortable) but she is also holding back.

If she gets happy feet she is excited, passionate, and incredibly comfortable. Very good point.

Sitting

Sitting down every man knows the sexy pose, legs crossed pointing toward you is always a good sign. Legs cross they show the calf muscle at it's sexiest. Drives most men crazy.

Legs pulled behind the chair legs is a very bad sign. She is extremely uncomfortable she is clinging to the chair for safety.

If her legs are out stretched toward you there is an intent to touch you, she is very comfortable with you and you have a serious shot with this girl.

If her legs look stiff in any manner you are in a bad way, a sign she is incredibly uncomfortable. She is has chosen to freeze, a primal move our natural reactions are not just fight or flight. They are freeze, fight, and flight. Most persons reaction is to freeze in a fear situation.

Still need to pay attention to where those toes are. What are they pointing toward.

Torso

Torso is the easiest to figure out.

If they are facing you they are interested if they are not you need their attention further or you need to bail out.

If they are leaning or bending away with their torso they aren't interested in the conversation or you, you need to change it up.

If they are angling their torso toward you or starting to move toward you(most of the time girls won't start facing their torso toward you till you become interesting to them) you are in great shape she is comfortable and interested.

If a girl tucks her head down in her shoulders(as discussed) she is uncomfortable, acting small. Trying to hide so to speak.

Shrugging shoulders can mean they are just shy holding back.

If a girl exposes her shoulder to you on purpose(just like in the movies boys, if you pay attention you will see it) she is quite attracted to you. This actually represents the roundness of an ass or a tit on a subconscious level.

If she is sticking her shoulders out in territorial manner(use your judgment it is pretty easy) she is pretty volatile and will require a calming down.


Man the more I talk about this the more I realize how much I have to go through. I could literally write a post every single day for the next month and you will still have to read up on it to get further in this pick up world.


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PostPosted: Fri Jul 23, 2010 1:40 am 
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good read! keep it up! Also how can you make sure your body language is always alpha male/confident


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PostPosted: Fri Jul 23, 2010 3:17 am 
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man really wanna thank you for your input. it is very interesting!

Im just back from clubbing and was about to go to sleep but just read your entire thread because it was that interesting.
thank you man

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crass wrote:
good read! keep it up! Also how can you make sure your body language is always alpha male/confident


Anatomical is the perfect alpha stance. How you carry yourself will make you feel the way you do. Standing unconfident for a lot of people makes you unconfident. Standing confident makes you feel confident. Your standing in that way because it is comfortable to your mood. So if you change your stance and your shoulders you should actually end up becoming confident. Your body language can change your mood if you adjust it.

Generally the standard alpha pose is to have a wide stance(territorial) with confident shoulders. You almost want to pull your scapula s together, it will push your chest out. Chin should always be up, DON'T tuck your head into your neck.

Do not slouch you should have good posture, it is an incredibly attractive natural feature. Sounds like a mom talking but it is true to walk with good posture. Good posture just makes you look like a somebody, and feel like somebody.

While you do this walk with your chin up, don't put your eyes down to the ground when your walking, how many times have you seen an alpha guys staring at the ground walking? NEVER. Hiding your eyes from them in an effort to hide yourself doesn't work. Make eye with people contact while you walk, you are not afraid of anyone. No one is better than you and you can convey that through your body language.

Some men, this is a very western orientated style, will grab their belt buckle with their thumb, letting their thumbs sit on the belt letting your fingers go down basically framing your junk. I occasionally stand like this, if I am uncomfortable or unconfident doing this helps me feel more confident. Sometimes I do just stand like that. Sticking your hands in your pockets with your thumbs out is similar but not nearly as pronounced.

Most of being alpha in body language is in the shoulders, stance, and head. The rest is purely the mindset, walk confidently, stand confidently, sit confidently. Don't worry about other people that is why we are unconfident we worry far to much about some strangers opinion of us that in all likelihood will never make any splash in our lives.

Your arms should be fluid, don't try to be fluid because you will look awkward and weird, just be fluid, be yourself. I am not a fan of crossing your arms, it is very alpha but it can come across as unfriendly and definitely not welcoming. I am usually pretty loose, I put my arms out friendly with open arms. My palms are normally facing out.

My advice to you is: Every time you go through a door way. Every time you are standing. When you are home. At work. Anywhere. Practice putting your shoulders straight out by pulling your scapulas together, keep your chest out. Walk everywhere with your chin up not snooty(don't look down your nose at people), just parallel with the ground. Act like your the man everywhere you go. When your home you don't slouch as much, I promise, but when you are out you are not comfortable and your body language probably speaks volumes. This is going to take a lot of conscious effort, it will not come naturally. When your just standing have your feet shoulder width apart. I am literal when I say practice. You can't just say I will do it, it isn't easy to change your body language, you have to consciously do it until it is habit.

Hope that helps! Good luck!!

See you guys Sunday night, going to Vegas this weekend! SWEET JELLY BEANS! If I think of more to add to this section I will. Right now I need sleep.


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I do have to write this. You guys should be studying body language everywhere, I am always watching people. You should be reading people, I get a lot of conversations started by reading their mood and how they feel. Watching people can teach you so much, you need to learn to decipher things quickly and a good way of doing this is studying other people socializing. Courtship is my favorite one to watch, I can normally tell what each guy did wrong. Remember 93% of communication has nothing to do with what you said but how you said(tone, speed, pitch, etc.) and conveyed it(body language). If you watch other people you can learn what they did wrong, and you can learn from others mistakes.

A wise man learns from is own mistakes, a wiser man learns from the mistakes of others.

Please, please study body language everywhere including home. TV body language is no different than in person body language(if they are good actors) all the same things happen, we just don't notice them, it is a solid way to watch some body language at home. Mute it figure out what is being said without hearing a word. Always always watch body language I can't stress that enough. You have to practice it everywhere.


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Arms and Hands

Arms and Hands are the most consciously controlled part of the body. It is what we use the most consciously. When we walk we don’t think about it, when we drive we don’t think about our feet as much. But when we grab something we think about it first. When we steer we think about it.

Arms

Arms are pretty simple, if they are closed they are uncomfortable if they are open they are uncomfortable.

Arms Crossed- Arms is an obvious sign of discomfort. They are closing themselves off. They are trying to comfort themselves by creating a barrier between them and anyone else. This doesn’t mean they are uncomfortable with you make sure to put the body language into context.

Welcoming Arms- They are welcoming generally a sign of comfort, they are in a comfortable mood. Sometimes a man will welcome a violent interaction by doing this.

Arm Barriers- In a lot of cases a woman real create a barrier when she is uncomfortable. She may throw her arms up with her elbows down (boxers do this as a defensive tactic). Some times they will hug themselves in an effort to comfort themselves with. Sometimes it will be them grabbing their bicep with their opposite hand, a one armed hug of there self. A sign as discomfort that most drunk men miss, they deliver hugs to girls in a very creepy way. Sometimes a girl will cover the little divot below the Adam’s apple or cover her heart as a protective safety feel. Some girls do this when they are surprised in a story, the Oh My open mouth look.

Arms Behind Back- Sometimes a person will have their arms in back of them as if to hide them. Generally the further up they are grabbing their arm on behind their back the more likely they are uncomfortable, they maybe shy. Generally standing with your hands behind your back with your hand grabbing your wrist is a military stance, but it can give you confidence because it forces good posture. When they are grabbing their wrist they may be uncomfortable but likely they are just holding back.

Arms High, Hands On Head- Everyone will throw their hands up on their head with their fingers interwoven. This allows you to consume more oxygen. It is a sign of discomfort. Your body needs more oxygen. Someone just scared, mentally, or physically tired may show these signs.

Loose Arms- You never want the person you are talking to, to have tension in their arms. They should let them dangle. It is a sign of discomfort when they are stiff or robotic. Shy girls do this a lot to not be noticed or attract any unwanted attention, that doesn’t necessarily mean they are bad.

Hands

Hands are generally the most difficult part to interpret. They are used for so much that context most definitely is involved with each interpretation, and movement has to be taken into consideration.

Fist- Obviously a sign of discomfort. They are volatile. Look for discoloration around the knuckles to see how upset they truly are.

The Steeple- When you have your hands together with your fingers touching at the tip as if praying. Sign of discomfort. Sign of strong discomfort when the palms are pressed together.

The Clasped Hands- Normally a sign of discomfort. A lot of shy girls do this; it is a way for her to comfort herself.

Interwoven Fingers- The person is generally uncomfortable. They are grabbing on to themselves.

Chin on Hand- If the chin is rested on the hand they are uncomfortable. They are bored and need help to hold their head up(every once in a while they are just seduced). If they are just touching their chin they are generally curious or interested, it seems like something extremely noticeable that none of us tend to notice.

Caressing Herself- If a girl is lightly rubbing her arm she may be giving you a sign to touch her. A lot of times a girl will lightly touch her arm when she is ready to escalate to touch. Other times she is rubbing herself she is trying to rub something off (dusting herself off, picking lint off, etc.) and that is a sign of discomfort.

Covering Face- If they are covering their face they are hiding it. This is something a lot of children do to hide them from a situation. If you are telling a story to a person they will sometimes do this when an expected even occurs in the story and take in a breath. This is a sign of discomfort.

Touching the Nose – Made most famous by Clinton who during his Monica trials was seen doing this in court while he lied. A lot of times it will be a sign they are deflecting a question or lying. Sign of discomfort. Rubbing the Eyebrow is very similar. Rubbing the side or back of the neck is also similar.

Hand Protection- In some cases a women will cover her neck, the divot below her neck, her heart or her face when they are not comfortable. Sign of discomfort.

Clammy Hands- A lot of people have clammy hands. They get nervous and their hands get clammy. This is a sign of discomfort but out of nervousness or shyness in most cases.

Getting the Finger- Sometimes a person will subconsciously give you the finger. If this happens you need to bail, they are definitely not comfortable.

Stroking Hand- Some girls will start stroking a glass or a pen, some sort of cylindrical item. It is a sexual sign that says all systems are a go. If they are stroking something you are solid, and it does happen guys you probably just weren’t paying attention when it did. Sign of comfort.

Palm Down on Table- If someone is standing there with their hands on the table with their palms flat they are uncomfortable. They are clinging to the desk so to speak. If they have their hand just sitting their resting on the table it is a sign of comfort, just want the hand to be loose.

Wrist Exposure- If a women is willing to show you her wrist it is a great sign. This is surrendering action very submissive. Sign of comfort. However if she is hiding her wrist she is uncomfortable.

Hands on Knees- If their hands are under the table and their hands are under their knees they are hiding some of their extremities. It is a sign of discomfort. Sometimes in cases where there is no table a lot of people will rest their hands on their knees. Note: Pay attention to the tension in their hands to see whether they are clinging to their knees or not.

The Reach- There is an action that is intent to touch without doing so. Sometimes with a couple one will reach their hand out and the other will reciprocate with touch. It is as if they are reaching to touch you. This is a sign of extreme comfort, they want to touch you, and they want you to touch them.

Allowing Touch- Sometimes a girl will allow you to touch her hands. I am a big fan of further examination of jewelry (rings) and comparing hand size if it is allowed. If a girl allows you to touch her hand she is comfortable with you. If she grabs your hand it is a serious sign of comfort obviously.

Man there are several more but after rewriting this 3 times because of comp problems I am calling it. I will add some more later.


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PostPosted: Tue Jul 27, 2010 8:04 am 
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The Reach- There is an action that is intent to touch without doing so. Sometimes with a couple one will reach their hand out and the other will reciprocate with touch. It is as if they are reaching to touch you. This is a sign of extreme comfort, they want to touch you, and they want you to touch them.


Are you talking about a stretch or what? I'm not sure what this is exactly. I'm guessing this is like someone sitting next to you and reaching over you to grab something off a table, but I don't know.

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Tundra wrote:
Are you talking about a stretch or what? I'm not sure what this is exactly. I'm guessing this is like someone sitting next to you and reaching over you to grab something off a table, but I don't know.


If you are sitting across the table and their hand reaches across to you. If you are sitting on a couch and their hand is laid further toward you. If Your in a car she extends her arm toward you. If you are laying in bed and she let's her arm extend toward you while your "talking".

If they extend their hand toward you in any way. Just some sort of reach toward you that looks like their asking for touch through act.

A good example I was once sitting at a table and this girl had her arm reached out to me(a stranger we claimed the table at the same time). I looked over said "oh that is an interesting ring", she extended her hand further a little bit of caressing happened(courtship was in full swing) and obvious interest was shown with her want to be touched by me(there was several other body language signs). Just based off noticing her reach toward me I got a serious elevation in a short period of time.


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I think as long as you genuinely don't give a shit, your body language will reflect that.

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Owinover wrote:
I think as long as you genuinely don't give a shit, your body language will reflect that.


Didn't even read the thread did you buddy? Probably best not to make comments until you do so. All I ask is you read the information before you make a comment. This isn't just about your body language this about reading their body language. 93% of communication is non-verbal, you better pick up on those things or your going to put your self in some bad situations.

From a alpha stand point you are somewhat correct, however, genuinely not giving a shit as you put it means nothing. You better walk like your the man, not just like you don't care. Walking like you don't care can give you some looks but walking like you don't care because your the man will get you to have people introduce themselves.

Example: I went to Vegas over the weekend. I dressed decent. Me and a couple of friends were walking the strip, a girl walks up and says hi my name is. We didn't give our name then she asked for an introduction, she then asked if we were famous. She said our attitude and clothes reflected us looking famous. We didn't just walk as if we didn't care, we walked as if no one was better than us. We walked as if we were the man.

Please read the thread before making anymore comments.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Jul 29, 2010 9:27 am 
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Courtship

On to the good stuff, I have told you guys all how to find out whether you should leave or continue a conversation. Knowing when you need to leave is a good thing. Knowing when you are being called over is entirely different. This is approaching a girl who has already given you interest. These women will be far more open to your approach, more importantly less likely to use that bitch shield.

Preening

We all know the preening. We see a women stroke her hair while she is in a conversation with us we know she likes us. We can tell just based off that one moment of her stroking her hair. We know that adjustment in her hair means she is interested. She is playing with her appearance to make her more attractive.

Well preening isn’t limited to just hair. Any adjustment in their physical appearance is a form of preening. Think about how many of YOU guys do these things. Straighten your shirt. Grab a pant leg. Adjust your hair. Move your hat. Grab your belt buckle. Etc. Congrats guys those are all forms of preening. You are adjusting your appearance in an effort to be more attractive for an attractive mate.

Women are no different guys. A girl might straighten her hair. She may just move her hair beside. She may move her necklace. She may grab her earrings. Adjust her bracelet. She might straighten her shirt. There may be an adjustment in her skirt or pants. These are all very good signs if it is directed at you. Any adjustment in her appearance is a good thing. We don’t realize that these are all signals they use subconsciously to call us.

So when you observe a girl look for different things than you are use to. Everyone knows the basics but what they don’t seem to realize is that we adjust our image because of insecurities. Most women are just as insecure or more than we are, why else would their image matter that much unless they were insecure. Confident people do not need to adjust their appearance, they are fine the way they are. A women who is attracted to a guy generally show insecurities when they adjust their appearance or they show submissive signals.

So from now on gentlemen, when you notice an alpha you will see he never adjusts his appearance. A confident guy just rolls through things never worrying about anything. When you run into these women they will be adjust themselves if they are physically attracted to you. Pay attention to any adjustment in their appearance: Hair(most common is moving hair from their forehead), Clothes(adjusting their clothing: straightening, grabbing, scuffling, etc.), Accessories(if they are adjusting their jewelry(playing with or moving it to a proper position) or shoes (a double check or something).

Directed at Me?

Alright guys the easiest way to see if this is directed at you is to make strong eye contact. A girl will in some order start with eye contact than show a submissive signal, than a smile, a preen of some sort, or another positive body language aspect.

Most of the time we miss these things very easily I mean how could something as simple as eye contact, looking down, moving hair, and a slight grin be missed? That is so small. Yet it means so much. Think about how we discussed clusters and how you have to read body language in clusters. So what happened there? You received 4 positive body language signs. For all you know you get closer and her foot is pointed toward you as well. This means you missed the smallest of things but she lost interest because you didn’t even acknowledge her. Now she is rolling home with the guy who did notice these clusters.

Now back to seeing if that body language is meant for you. If you made eye contact she will likely look away quickly, in some cases she will do some courtship signals or in other cases she will freeze up as her first reaction or look away then freeze up. Shy girls do this and the majority of girls are shy. At any which rate keep your eyes in her direction, if she is interested she will look back over with in a few minutes. Normally within a minute she will return for another gander of the goods. Men do the same thing we look in their direction to see if she will look back. Girls are no different we just don’t have the “intuition” they do.

If a girl looks away it isn’t a bad thing. We as guys do the same thing without thinking, we don’t want to be caught checking out a girl. They don’t want to be caught checking out a guy, how creepy is it when you get caught staring?

So this is the basic jist of what happens when a girl sees a guy she likes, most of the time. Not in all cases but since this is the one we seem to fall short on the most, we will give you this one. Look for this one everyday see where or who you get it from.

She makes eye contact.
She will look away; she will show a submissive sign.
She will preen.
She will again look back again and return eye contact generally within 2 minutes.

If he doesn’t notice, which most men don’t, she will repeat this action maybe with a different preen. But she will always return for another look and try to get eye contact.

The point being if they make solid eye contact than continue on to do something(look down chances are it was directed at you. If she looks over again you are solid make the approach.

Submissive Signals

Submissive signals is something most of us miss as well. All it takes is some sort of submissive motion, most of the time it is looking down or away.

The eyes often times will look down. Sometimes their eyes will look down and away. Both are submissive signs. Other times they may actually droop their chin and head down and look up at you with strong eye contact and a slight grin. Princess Diana was known for this. If they look up it is not a good sign but always take context into consideration.

Most of the time the person will turn their whole head down. Looking at the ground in a submissive manner. When you stare down someone the person who looks down loses. So looking down is a submissive move with courtship as well. A slightly turned head is a sign of submission, great to get most guys miss it, it took me forever to notice it regularly.

The head will a lot of times move in a way that exposes the neck. Looking down and away with a head motion exposes the neck. A very sensitive area, even dogs know that giving them your neck is a submissive move. So in a way a girl could out stretch her neck and slightly turn her head as a submissive move. In other cases they may tuck their head into their shoulders, shy girls are known best for this.

Girls will in some cases shrug their shoulders. They will move their arms up and shrug and this is a submissive move that is very difficult to catch. It does happen but it is hard to catch. Some girls will even move in way to expose their shoulder, that was Marilyn Monroe’s move, a slightly dipped up shoulder with raised eye brows, slight grin, and looking slightly looking up at the camera.

Exposing the palms of the hands is a very submissive move, it is welcoming in about every culture I know of. It is something friends, brothers, aunts, cousins, uncles, mothers, daughters, etc. all do to welcome their loved ones. If she is finding a way to expose her wrist to you than you are in good shape this is very similar to the palms if her hand is high and she is showing you her wrist she is waiting impatiently for you to approach her.

Fiddling isn’t necessarily a submissive move but it does attract the attention they are looking for and gives them something to do when they are nervous. Fiddling when it is directed at you is very good and should be taken into consideration as a positive signal.

When a girl bites her nails or nibbles on anything else (jewelry, straw, cup, etc.) and she is directing it at you, you should pay very close attention and perhaps make an approach. She is likely sending you other signals so watch closely. This is a nervous sign, not necessarily submissive but all body language should be taken into consideration.

More tomorrow I am tired….


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 Post subject: The Art of Body Language
PostPosted: Thu Jul 29, 2010 2:04 pm 
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Hey dude, I have read this thread, and you make some really great points and have some great advice.

One point I will make is: when you are trying to work on your body language, you should focus individually on areas of your body as described in this thread. If you try to take on all this information at once, you will go into information overload, and it will become apparent that you are thinking about how you carry yourself. I would copy and paste the info on this thread and then print it out to refer to each day.

Body language is so much more powerful than any opener you will be taught. And I agree that one of the most valuable skills you will learn from this thread is how to read her body language, as women don't give you a running commentary of their emotions do they, so you need to be able to read them. Women find it f**king attractive when a guy can connect with them emotionally. You will master body language when you naturally carry yourself in such a way, and it will then become apparent that it is natural, such as the story of when poeticlyskuac was in vegas...

Quote:
Example: I went to Vegas over the weekend. I dressed decent. Me and a couple of friends were walking the strip, a girl walks up and says hi my name is. We didn't give our name then she asked for an introduction, she then asked if we were famous. She said our attitude and clothes reflected us looking famous. We didn't just walk as if we didn't care, we walked as if no one was better than us. We walked as if we were the man.


My final word on this is not to be too strict with where each body part should be, there is no mathematic distances or angles, so just follow the guidelines and be comfortable - if you feel uncomfortable you will look uncomfortable.


This is a good article poeticlyskuac. Some good books you have mentioned too, another great one is:

What Every Body Is Saying: An Ex-FBI Agent's Guide to Speed-reading People by Joe Navarro



Miles


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