social anxiety, can't talk to women



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PostPosted: Mon Mar 13, 2017 6:32 am 
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I have social anxiety. I cannot interact with women. I try to muster all the courage possible and I just can't do it. I always embarrass and humiliate myself somehow. Obviously no girl wants a guy who has social anxiety. They have far better options to choose from. Any suggestions on how to approach women despite having social anxiety


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PostPosted: Mon Mar 13, 2017 7:22 am 
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princesschefguy wrote:
Any suggestions on how to approach women despite having social anxiety


Approach women, despite having social anxiety.

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PostPosted: Tue Mar 14, 2017 10:55 pm 
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you have to man up! and approach, nobody is going to do that for you.....look try 3 deep breaths when you feel the anxiety then you can approach...that should calm you down enough for you to approach.


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PostPosted: Thu Mar 16, 2017 12:55 am 
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princesschefguy wrote:
I have social anxiety. I cannot interact with women. I try to muster all the courage possible and I just can't do it. I always embarrass and humiliate myself somehow. Obviously no girl wants a guy who has social anxiety. They have far better options to choose from. Any suggestions on how to approach women despite having social anxiety


Since it's being a big problem for you, you should advance slowly... You DON'T have to interact with them now. You don't have to talk to them at all.

Just try to get courage to be able ONE DAY to say a single 'hi' to an ugly/not so beautiful girl that passes by you in the street. Don't expect any reaction from her (iteraction should mean something like 'action from both sides'). It's just a simple 'hi', nothing offensive and yet you do not expect any answer - you just pass by.

Start with that and see what happens... :wink:

princesschefguy wrote:
They have far better options to choose from.

This is stupid.

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PostPosted: Fri Mar 17, 2017 1:00 am 
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Coming from someone who has experienced anxiety and even panic attacks, the only way to defeat them is to face what you fear. Even if you have to do it in small steps... speak to women.


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 17, 2017 2:56 pm 
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princesschefguy wrote:
I have social anxiety.


At least now you have something to blame. A shitty excuse is better than none at all.

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PostPosted: Fri Mar 17, 2017 4:34 pm 
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I'm currently trying to help a friend through this. He is an introvert and also has a hard time talking to women he doesn't know. I've been suggesting the talking to random people as you pass and even ones you don't find attractive. Not much else I can suggest as it was easy for me to get over this when I was younger.


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 17, 2017 4:46 pm 
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PostPosted: Fri Mar 17, 2017 5:40 pm 
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Thats like asking if we have any advice for you to get healthy when you have an addiction to junk food. And you come whining about the addiction to junk food being the main reason why you can't get healthy. Get over yourself bro. The fear of approaching another human being and starting a conversation because they might say " No " is one of the most childish immature weak common fears that i have ever come across. It has no basis, it is only a fear of your own imagination. Its insanity. Its not like fear of a Tiger, because they can harm you, its fear of knowing that not everyone on the planet wants to fuck you. Which you already know..

Get over yourself.

You want the results then make the approach. If you want to whine about fears, this isn't really the place. Man on up bro.

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PostPosted: Tue Apr 04, 2017 8:51 am 
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princesschefguy wrote:
I have social anxiety. I cannot interact with women. I try to muster all the courage possible and I just can't do it. I always embarrass and humiliate myself somehow. Obviously no girl wants a guy who has social anxiety. They have far better options to choose from. Any suggestions on how to approach women despite having social anxiety


I have social anxiety as well, but i've been working on it very intensely every since i started doing pickup & self-improvement almost 4 years ago. So i can really relate to your struggle.


When you approach any girl, assume familiarity. And that is basically..go up to her as if "you already know her", and as if "she already knows you". If you approach every girl with this mindset, you will minimize your approach anxiety on the approach. FYI..you have to mind fuck yourself into adopting this mentality on every approach. This is a technique that is no different from any other type of affirmation or the un-wiring of limiting beliefs that intermediate & advanced puas had to learn to overcome mild to severe approach anxiety/social anxiety (probably through alot of practice & repetition of approaching hundreds to thousands of girls, from going out daily for years). If there is somewhat of a shortcut, than this technique is probably it. You don't have approach anxiety with people that you already know, correct?. So that is the whole premise to this technique.


This is an epiphany that i've just started experimenting with. It can help to reduce AA (Approach Anxiety), and you worrying about what on-lookers (people close by who see you approaching the girl) might think about it..because for all they know..you and the girl already know each other. So when you approach her, it appears from the on-lookers point-of-view that you and the girl are already familiar with each other. Again..this inner-game technique is a mind fuck on yourself, so it will take practice for you to perfect it. Of course you don't know the girl, because it is a "cold approach"..but mind fucking your brain into buying into the belief that you and her already know each other, will help you to approach her with far less anxiety and a far more relaxed demeanor than you probably would've otherwise. And in return..the girl will probably be more comfortable with you and more receptive to you, if you are cold approaching her from that state of mind (if you are familiar with "The Law Of State Transference" - Whatever you feel..she feels). I found it to be helpful, particularly in extremely high social pressure situations like; when i have to approach a moving target (an HB walking) from a distance..which would require me to run up to her, and stop her. Probably with other people around watching me do this.


Try this out, and let me know if it helps.


-G

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PostPosted: Wed Apr 05, 2017 3:59 pm 
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Classic symptoms of low testosterone.

Your problem isnt women, your problem is you've given up on yourself. You sound like a nerdy kid who plays lots of MMO's.

Solution is to start working out. Run and lift weights, clean up your diet, get fit strong and healthy, and you'll naturally become more attractive. Maintain the habit of keeping fit and healthy and your anxiety will eventually fade away.

Start doing more excersise, and reduce how often you masturbate. One ejaculation per month and you'll be more alpha than you've ever been.


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 06, 2017 12:54 am 
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These responses are pretty brutal.

I recommend building yourself up first. Learn about your anxiety first -- read some books that talk to you (Feeling Good is a good book on CBT) or go to a therapist.

Some exposure, bit by bit, like some guys above mentioned will help too. But not if you're paralyzed in those situations. It really depends how bad your anxiety is, and only you or a psychiatrist can determine that. I do recommend learning about your anxiety sooner than later. Good luck friend


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PostPosted: Tue Apr 25, 2017 11:45 am 
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R.C wrote:
princesschefguy wrote:
Any suggestions on how to approach women despite having social anxiety


Approach women, despite having social anxiety.


Pretty much this. I use to be like you bro, and somewhat can still be cautious. Today though, my caution comes from thinking whether or not I have to see them again if my approach f#cks up. If I don't have to see them again, I go for gold; win or lose.

There are tips you can do to help yourself. First though, why are you anxious?
Fear of rejection? Unattractive?

If you fear rejection, don't. Treat it like sales. You may be told NO 99 times, but 1 time you will be told YES. Just keep at it. Each time you get rejected, analyse the situation and break it down. Why did I get rejected? What did she say? How can I work around what was said for next time?

If you are unattractive, my friend, come to realise that as teenagers the game is about pure physical appearance, most of the time. As adults, most of the time, the game is psychological.

The tips to get a bit more confidence:
- Workout bro, if you don't already. Even if you were say, overweight or skinny as fk, a big of training can make a few bumps that look good with clothes on.
- Get a nice hair cut. Find a style that fits your face well, and is in season. If you don't know which one, ask a hot hairdresser. They want the money, and you want the advice. They'll be honest and help out.
- Get some nice clothes. Bro, you don't have to spend a lot of money on this. Go to some cheap stores and find some threads that look good, and fit you well. Not too tight. Not too loose.

A nice hair cut. Some nice clothes. A couple of bumps under the shirt. Can do wonders for you bro.

One more hint. A few years ago, I had this good friend. He was really overweight and a bit of a "child" at heart. He did something that most guys would never do and would call gay as fk. He bought fake eyelashes and had them professionally put on. He had the motherfking eyelashes of a woman.
His eyelashes and his "don't care if I get rejected or not" netted him some beautiful girls at the club who we would take back to the hotel rooms. He married a gorgeous girl too.

Own it, brother!


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PostPosted: Fri Apr 28, 2017 6:56 am 
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Take the Newbie Challenge on this site.


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PostPosted: Sat May 06, 2017 9:31 pm 
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For someone with social anxiety you're pretty fucking arrogant. You steal people's precious time by being lazy instead of doing an easy search on this forum or google.

There has been more than enough work written for guys like you.

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