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aFTeRm4Th
PUA Forum Enthusiast
Joined: 22 Nov 2007
Posts: 34
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 Posted: Sun Dec 09, 2007 4:25 am Post subject: Approach Anxiety |
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Alright, so I just got done reading the Mystery Method and I feel like I got a lot outa the book. One thing that I have noticed reciently that has been killin my game is my approach anxiety. Normally, before I read this book and started really thinkin like PUA, I feel like I wasn't worried about approaching at all. But lately, I psyc myself out every time and can't even build up the confidence to really go out and talk to chicks. It seems like I know all the good information and my mind kinda goes blank when I get out there. I don't really have any canned material memorized other than a few openers and I kno the basic tactics. Also, I kno the best advice is to just get out there and practice, but I would like some more, field tested, input on how to overcome this. What did you guys do to get past this when you were starting out? and would you recommend me creating a whole routine for myself, memorizing it, and using it in the field... if so may I have some examples of what you guys use.
Also, I tend to be at the party scenes more than the bars. And lately I just wanna get over this cause it is killin my game. |
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JSmooth
PUA Forum Leader
Joined: 20 Oct 2007
Posts: 2448
Location: Nashville
Reputation: 278.1
votes: 25
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| Posted: Sun Dec 09, 2007 4:13 pm Post subject: |
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The absolute best advice I can give you is to get out there and do it. You've read the Mystery Method, so you know about the 3 second rule. I recommend memorizing 3 openers, and no more. Now memorize about 4 negs, no more. You have 3 openers to use and stack, and 4 negs to use once the set hooks and you get to A2.
In the mean time, force yourself to be social and say "HI." Try to make a point to talk to random people, strangers, about weather, school, parties, or practice the openers on them and then eject.
You can do it. I know it's a big hurdle to jump over, but once you do life gets easier. Try psyching yourself up before going out, watch a video on youtube featuring Mystery, listen to your favorite music on the way there, just pump yourself up. |
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aFTeRm4Th
PUA Forum Enthusiast
Joined: 22 Nov 2007
Posts: 34
Reputation: 5.9
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| Posted: Sun Dec 09, 2007 5:08 pm Post subject: |
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| Thanks, definitely will give this a try... also heard of a good gigglemethod by zen I think I will try |
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Thugnificient
Member of PUA Forum
Joined: 07 Dec 2007
Posts: 132
Reputation: 19
votes: 2
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| Posted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 6:48 am Post subject: |
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| AA is just a figment of your imagination. Thats my philosophy anyways...Think why would you be scared of some little girl makes no sense |
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Starbuck
PUA Forum Leader
Joined: 23 Jun 2007
Posts: 1135
Location: S.C. USA
Reputation: 121.3
votes: 1
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| Posted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 1:11 pm Post subject: |
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AA is related to outcome. Another term that's closely related is 'performance anxiety'. You're pressuring yourself to do everything just right to achieve whatever goal you have with a particular woman.
Not based upon what you know about her or your interactions with her, but based upon what you think you see. This psyches you out.
You've got the wrong frame.
Try to have fun, be friendly and meet women initially with no goal in mind. Then you can escalate once you gauge her interest in you.
Remember you lose nothing by going home alone. You're doing that anyway, remember? |
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raycasanova
PUA Forum Enthusiast
Joined: 06 Oct 2007
Posts: 89
Reputation: 16.1
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| Posted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 3:27 pm Post subject: |
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| Easiest way to lose AA is to not go in there expecting anything, just strike up a conversation like you would with any other person. Once you opened the set you should go on from there. |
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