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ki
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Joined: 06 Jan 2009
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 Posted: Sun Jul 05, 2009 9:54 am Post subject: |
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WRRRRRARRRGH! dont take someones opinion so dahm seriously over the internet
make your own dahm newbie challenge best suited to you. ask someone for the time, ask someone for directions. training is going to a level where you start to feel some resistance. stress yourself out, a little.
if you feel some stress asking directions or carrying on talking after you ask for directions then GOOD your levelling up! Plus while your talking to new people your getting positive interactions or your coming back with a vengence  .
Me and me wing started asking directions to start with till we got bored with finding where the same dahm club was which lead as a gateway to harder stuff
"...........i failed the newbie mission.................." crippling |
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Mr E
PUA Forum Addict
Joined: 24 Mar 2009
Posts: 269
Location: Canaries
Reputation: 41.4
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| Posted: Sun Jul 05, 2009 11:31 pm Post subject: |
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Today I did my own Spanish version of the newbie mission as I went around the park doing my morning jog.
I simply said hello to every babe I encountered going round. Out of the ten people I said hello to, only one didn't reply with hello back. I felt pretty good about it. |
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Cloudboy
PUA Forum Enthusiast
Joined: 25 Apr 2009
Posts: 30
Location: Louisville, Kentucky, USA
Reputation: 11.4
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| Posted: Tue Jul 07, 2009 8:18 pm Post subject: |
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| I did this mission today. Weren't many girls at the mall since it's a Tuesday, I will try again on Saturday. I was amazed at some of the replies I got. Just smiling and saying "hi" seemed to get some girls so excited! That boosted my confidence like nothing else. It really helped me when I didn't fare so well. A couple of girls obviously had a b-shield up, but I didn't let it phase me on the inside, and certainly not the outside, in the least. It really took down some of my AA, and I can't wait to do it again. I am so excited! Also, I noticed that the only asian girl I said hello to was also the only girl to not seem to give me any kind of response. She just kind of stared. Has anyone else noticed this? It definitely didn't bother me at all, but it did make me think she might have some issues... Oh and by the way the girls with the shields up even smiled and said hello, but in a very cocky way. All part of the game I suppose... Anyway thanks for this mission guys! |
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Ethan Hewitt
Member of PUA Forum
Joined: 12 Jan 2009
Posts: 122
Location: Hong Kong
Reputation: 26.2
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| Posted: Wed Jul 15, 2009 3:02 pm Post subject: |
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Just to like to mention about the situation back in the UK. I was born and raised in the UK, but now reside in Hong Kong. I went back to the UK last year for a holiday. In that time I did some hiking, everyone we passed we would say Hi to and everyone would respond, sometimes you could throw a line out about the weather or whatever.
I understand that in malls or on the streets things might seem different, but it's just people's limiting minds. You simply think because no one is looking or saying anything to you that you should just settle for your comfort zone and be like them. That's not going to help you get a long in this game.
Now, where I currently live, I can say Hi to people and they will respond but not to the level that I could get in the UK/USA due to cultural and language barriers. Sure the word 'Hi' is universally known, but some local folk here are petrified to speak English, so you try to use their language. It can work, you can overcome the barriers, you can get past this if you think you can. It's a matter of what you think you can do,
In my profession I have to say hi/goodbye to like 600 people each and everyday. I don't find it a problem talking to strangers but it doesn't mean my AA has gone away. I don't think it ever will, but i use it as a healthy fear of approach. I feel my competence more than makes up for a little lack of confidence. |
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Stuck
PUA Forum Enthusiast
Joined: 23 Jun 2009
Posts: 34
Reputation: 3.5
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| Posted: Thu Jul 23, 2009 9:51 pm Post subject: |
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Ok well hi everyone im stuck, and a new aspiring to be PUA. I tried the newbee challenge yesterday. to get myself at a higher level mood wise I drank 2 beers before hand. then I went to 3 different malls. I live in a fairly small city and during the day the mall was mostly filled with grannys haha. but I did try to get eye contact and smile.
the problem i found was it was extremely hard to get any attention at all! I managed to get a smile from an around 30 yo UB5 but she was passing the opposite direction and couldn't get a "hi" in. It was a good feeling smiling and having her smile back though  mostly it was people not maintaining eye contact. seems stupid to say hi to someone when they haven't even acknoledged you - if you know what i mean?
at the third mall I went to I did see this HB7 that I fucked a couple years ago, so was nice giving her a hug (she has a bf and a baby to him now! haha) so the hug and a very brief chat was all i wanted anyway... |
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Stuck
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Joined: 23 Jun 2009
Posts: 34
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| Posted: Thu Jul 23, 2009 9:53 pm Post subject: |
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| clubs seem to be the way to go... I might try this again at a better time maybe late night shopping when more chicks my age (mid to late 20's) will be around. |
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Chief
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Joined: 23 Aug 2007
Posts: 3349
Location: South Korea
Reputation: 306.2
votes: 47
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| Posted: Thu Jul 23, 2009 11:57 pm Post subject: |
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| Stuck wrote: | | to get myself at a higher level mood wise I drank 2 beers before hand. |
Fucking weak, bro. |
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Stuck
PUA Forum Enthusiast
Joined: 23 Jun 2009
Posts: 34
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| Posted: Fri Jul 24, 2009 2:02 am Post subject: |
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yeah well i am still new at this, I never said i wasn't weak.. alcohol helps me as i do get anxiety at the moment still. Judge me for it if you like.
Also two beers is hardly going to effect me a great deal as I do drink often.
Hell... judge me for that too |
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Chief
Super Moderator
Joined: 23 Aug 2007
Posts: 3349
Location: South Korea
Reputation: 306.2
votes: 47
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| Posted: Fri Jul 24, 2009 2:50 am Post subject: |
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| Stuck wrote: | yeah well i am still new at this, I never said i wasn't weak.. alcohol helps me as i do get anxiety at the moment still. Judge me for it if you like.
Also two beers is hardly going to effect me a great deal as I do drink often.
Hell... judge me for that too |
Alcohol is a crutch. The more you use crutches, the more dependent you grow on them, and the less effective your standard game will be.
Take the hard path. It's the only path to real improvement.
EDIT: Yes I realize how ironic this is coming from me lol |
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Stuck
PUA Forum Enthusiast
Joined: 23 Jun 2009
Posts: 34
Reputation: 3.5
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| Posted: Fri Jul 24, 2009 4:43 am Post subject: |
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Thanks for the advice Chief I will keep it in mind... and I do agree with you, quicker brain when sober you are right.
I wonder as I get more relaxed with alcohol and overall talking to chicks is easier. Since I am going to need ALOT of practice to get any good as I know i have alot of room for improvement. Is it so bad to start out with alcohol if im more comfortable and will have more inital success with it? too boost my confidence as I really do lack confidence. Rejection seems to hurt much more without alcohol...
hopefully I can improve my inner game, as I know i have problems here...
or do you suggest I don't drink at all - even in nightclubs? I really can't dance sober - and alcohol makes me more horny which in turn makes me want to keep talking more if you know what i mean?
anyway dude thanks for this topic, any more advice for a newbie? |
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Chief
Super Moderator
Joined: 23 Aug 2007
Posts: 3349
Location: South Korea
Reputation: 306.2
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| Posted: Fri Jul 24, 2009 6:38 am Post subject: |
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| Stuck wrote: | Thanks for the advice Chief I will keep it in mind... and I do agree with you, quicker brain when sober you are right.
I wonder as I get more relaxed with alcohol and overall talking to chicks is easier. Since I am going to need ALOT of practice to get any good as I know i have alot of room for improvement. Is it so bad to start out with alcohol if im more comfortable and will have more inital success with it? too boost my confidence as I really do lack confidence. Rejection seems to hurt much more without alcohol...
hopefully I can improve my inner game, as I know i have problems here...
or do you suggest I don't drink at all - even in nightclubs? I really can't dance sober - and alcohol makes me more horny which in turn makes me want to keep talking more if you know what i mean?
anyway dude thanks for this topic, any more advice for a newbie? |
A note on relaxation: The best way to get relaxed when you need to is through breathing. Use breathing to keep yourself in the present moment. Relaxation breaks when you start focusing on either the past, future, or both.
A note on comfort: You're not supposed to be comfortable, anyway. You are supposed to make yourself UNCOMFORTABLE in order to ultimately expand your comfort zone. If you aren't making yourself uncomfortable, you are not improving. This concept applies to all facets of real self-improvement. You gain muscle mass only after muscle cells are destroyed so that they repair themselves and become bigger.
Drinking should be used for enjoyment only. If you are using alcohol as a crutch to suppress discomfort or anything like that, don't do it. Face your fears first and THEN reward yourself with that vodka tonic or that 7 and 7. |
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Stuck
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Joined: 23 Jun 2009
Posts: 34
Reputation: 3.5
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| Posted: Fri Jul 24, 2009 6:44 am Post subject: |
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Awesome dude I totally can see where you are coming from. Night out tonight so will use your advice, thanks!!  |
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-Wolf
New to PUA Forum
Joined: 24 Jul 2009
Posts: 10
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| Posted: Fri Jul 24, 2009 9:01 pm Post subject: It won't get any easier if you hesitate |
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@ cultural differences between England and the US.
Even if people thought you were a freak it didn't matter. As far as I've understood the whole exercise is about getting out of your comfort zone, not meeting anyone(yet). So I'd say, forget about people thinking you are a freak... And get out there - feel uncomfortable - love yourself afterwards - it's like jumping into the water, when you know it is really cold... Just do it - It won't get any warmer!
- Wolf |
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Wave_139
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Joined: 24 Jul 2009
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| Posted: Mon Jul 27, 2009 10:18 pm Post subject: |
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| I am freakin proud of myself, though i did not exactly go to the mall, still alil intimidating but i went to my college grounds and say hi with a smile to all the ladies that i saw, out of the 11 women i said hi to only 3 blew me off but one blew me off cuz i didnt say hi n just waved when she past, and the other two thought i was strange, I feel really really proud of myself, thanks |
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domalo
PUA Forum Enthusiast
Joined: 29 Jul 2009
Posts: 67
Location: southampton
Reputation: 12.2
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| Posted: Wed Jul 29, 2009 7:43 pm Post subject: |
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| Rite there seems to be a lot of things to do.... I just came to this site today looking for a paving stone to start from and here i found it, this is my first step and i am on it like a bear ios on a steak! This weekend im goin to do the mission wish me luck !!! quite exciting rly ....... |
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