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Pono
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Joined: 14 Jun 2007
Posts: 25
Location: Saco
Reputation: 3  
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 Posted: Sat Jun 23, 2007 6:44 pm Post subject: wat do you say after the opener? |
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hey guys just wondering i went to the beach yesterday and opened this set it kinda went like this
me: Are you guys shy? I’ve been standing here talking to my friend for like 5 minutes now and you still haven’t said ‘Hi’
her: noooooo we just saw you and thought u were cute
me: well thats nice of you to say but i mean come on you can look at us all day or you can learn to skimboard how bout it
her:sure y not
then i just couldnt think of anything to say thats usualy how it goes im still in the stage of getting over approach anxiety wat can you say after the opener besides fluff talk? |
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Starbuck
PUA Forum Leader
Joined: 23 Jun 2007
Posts: 1135
Location: S.C. USA
Reputation: 121.3
votes: 1
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| Posted: Sat Jun 23, 2007 9:54 pm Post subject: Re: wat do you say after the opener? |
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| Pono wrote: | hey guys just wondering i went to the beach yesterday and opened this set it kinda went like this
me: Are you guys shy? I’ve been standing here talking to my friend for like 5 minutes now and you still haven’t said ‘Hi’
her: noooooo we just saw you and thought u were cute
me: well thats nice of you to say but i mean come on you can look at us all day or you can learn to skimboard how bout it
her:sure y not
then i just couldnt think of anything to say thats usualy how it goes im still in the stage of getting over approach anxiety wat can you say after the opener besides fluff talk? |
Have you considered asking her about herself? Where she's from, school, interests, etc..? Never fails..
You can also tell her you like her hair or something of that sort.
As you gain experience and age you'll naturally have more to talk about.
Remember about 80% of communication is non verbal. So stand tall, look her directly in the eyes and smile. She get the message. And make sure you get a contact point from her, unless you have something definite in common with her, like school, etc...
Nothing worse than going through the trouble to build a little rapport and trust with a girl then never bumping into her again. And never obsess about any one girl.. That's why you need multiple games going at once.
Obsessing about any one girl is the kiss of death. If nothing else you'll psyche yourself out and seeing her will become a chore and a source of anxiety for you. |
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JackSwift
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Joined: 30 Jun 2007
Posts: 21
Reputation: 2.4
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| Posted: Mon Jul 02, 2007 9:38 pm Post subject: Re: wat do you say after the opener? |
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| Starbuck wrote: | | Have you considered asking her about herself? Where she's from, school, interests, etc..? Never fails... |
You don't think it is a little too generic and boring to launch into that? I would recommend going with a solid DHV story. Don't forget htose negs either!
Jack Swift |
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Slejpner
New to PUA Forum
Joined: 06 Jul 2007
Posts: 16
Location: Switzerland
Reputation: 2.3
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| Posted: Fri Jul 06, 2007 8:44 pm Post subject: |
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I know exactly what you are talking about...
after a 7 year relationship I am finally allowd to sarge girls in public and sober... So after 6 month of no sex I finally got my balls together and started opening girls during every day life. Personally I was astonished how well it goes.
But as you describe it as soon as I have a few IOI or a number I fell happy but on the same time just want to leave the situation ASAP!!!!
Well I guess you were looking for help not compassion... sorry.. 
cheerio |
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evolver
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Joined: 04 Jan 2007
Posts: 8
Reputation: 7.7
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| Posted: Sat Jul 07, 2007 5:40 am Post subject: Re: wat do you say after the opener? |
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| JackSwift wrote: | | Starbuck wrote: | | Have you considered asking her about herself? Where she's from, school, interests, etc..? Never fails... |
You don't think it is a little too generic and boring to launch into that? I would recommend going with a solid DHV story. Don't forget htose negs either!
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Jack Swift, there is absolutely nothing wrong with asking the girl questions to find out about her and get a conversation rolling. You don't DHV by telling some story about yourself, you DHV by being a confident man who can hold a natural conversation. Why would you hide the fact that you are interested in her? Forget Negs! Tease her and be playful, but unless your are talking to a HB10 bitch in a high energy environment, a neg is going to come across as uncalibrated and most likely make you look like a jerk.
One of the biggest mistakes I made early on was listening to KJs about what and what not to say. This shit set me back many, many months because I ended up being too worried to say the wrong thing.
What you talk about matters much less than your attitude, body language and dominance. I have a mate who is currently seeing 4 girls and he talks about anything he wants with girls. More importantly is when he does get them to reveal some information about themselves, he then relates to that on an emotional level and this creates a connection. Talking some story about yourself does not create a connection unless you can get the girl involved in the feelings behind that story. |
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Nerd Avenger
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Joined: 20 May 2007
Posts: 72
Reputation: 5.2
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| Posted: Sat Jul 07, 2007 1:56 pm Post subject: |
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i just read your post. and you said you tell em you are goin to teach them how to skim board or whatever.
so thats what you do. talk to them about skim boarding. tell em a cool story. start off with the basics.
take it from there. |
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FakeDrake
PUA Forum Enthusiast
Joined: 01 Jul 2007
Posts: 66
Reputation: 10.3
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| Posted: Sat Jul 07, 2007 4:59 pm Post subject: |
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| asking her personal questions would be giving her iois before building comfort. That's afc behaviour. since u r a player i think u should have neged her lightly:use all time classics "nice nails, are they real?","u re pretty for a shortie","ur nose g winkles when you laugh" etc(dont throw anything too heavy as she has already given u an ioi however u should build comfort) then tell a story and then go on normally on A3... |
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tnt23
PUA Forum Enthusiast
Joined: 28 Jun 2007
Posts: 42
Reputation: 8.8
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| Posted: Sat Jul 07, 2007 5:03 pm Post subject: |
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| FakeDrake wrote: | | asking her personal questions would be giving her iois before building comfort. That's afc behaviour. since u r a player i think u should have neged her lightly:use all time classics "nice nails, are they real?","u re pretty for a shortie","ur nose g winkles when you laugh" etc(dont throw anything too heavy as she has already given u an ioi however u should build comfort) then tell a story and then go on normally on A3... |
Agreed, as FakeDrake mentioned you could throw a neg, and then you skip in your routines ex. you could do the best friends test if there were two of them and by collecting the ioi's you go to the qualification phase where you don't have to talk that much |
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narcist
Member of PUA Forum
Joined: 12 Jan 2007
Posts: 107
Reputation: 34.5
votes: 1
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| Posted: Sat Jul 07, 2007 5:32 pm Post subject: |
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| ask her about a iteam of clothing, that always works for me and DON"T NEG A GIRL THATS NOT HB9 or HB10 unless she has a stong bitch shield!, rather be a hint of cocky funny, and hit of smooth and confident and ull be fine |
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Starbuck
PUA Forum Leader
Joined: 23 Jun 2007
Posts: 1135
Location: S.C. USA
Reputation: 121.3
votes: 1
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| Posted: Fri Aug 17, 2007 2:52 am Post subject: Re: wat do you say after the opener? |
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| JackSwift wrote: | | Starbuck wrote: | | Have you considered asking her about herself? Where she's from, school, interests, etc..? Never fails... |
You don't think it is a little too generic and boring to launch into that? I would recommend going with a solid DHV story. Don't forget htose negs either!
Jack Swift |
Not at all, you need information and it shows you're interested.. Information is the key to building rapport and trust with any girl. If you don't have rapport and trust you might as well be banging your hand, because unless she's drunk and has any sense whatsoever (in other words somebody you want to be with) she's never going to be alone with you without a certain degree of rapport and trust.
Heck this is one of the big three mistakes most guys make in my opinion. The failure to build rapport and trust, the ability to close, and escalation.
If she's inexperienced or you just don't know her very well but would like too, she may not know how to give you the info you need without being prodded. In her mind your inability to get info out of her is equivalent to failure. Because if you can't control her mind, or something as simple as a question and answer session how do you expect to control her body? Remember women want you to lead.
You don't have to be perfect, but you do have to try.
Besides women, like most people like talking about themselves. If she's not much of a talker, make a move on her and try to get the maximum enjoyment of the moment then forget about it. If you're into that sort of thing.
Any technique is better than no technique. 
And if a girl wants you, typically what you say is a lot less important than how you say it, your body language, and ability to escalate when given the proper cues (which are obvious to any girl but not always so obvious to us supposed gentlemen). As well as your focused attention on her. If she likes you, and its a good time she'll give you the opportunity. Take it.
If she doesn't, go beat your head against a brick wall instead.  |
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