Applying NLP and my stuttering

slyder2412 · Posted: Sun Apr 20, 2008 4:04 pm Post subject: Applying NLP and my stuttering

I posted this in the PUA lounge as i just remembered this site now has a section dedicated to NLP, so i'll replace it here.

Hey what's up guys? I truly feel that my odd/different/unusual way of speaking tends to make people feel confused as to what kind of person i am and in a face paced environment like a club, their attention span is hard to control even if you can fluently spit game.

On the outside i'll look like a confident, muscular, alpha, kind of guy...but since once i begin talking to someone i can immediately see an expression of confusion on their face. Although i usually never mention the fact that i stutter unless it's brought up or something the topic of speech pathology is discussed. Although it doesn't necessarily make people weirded out by me...the attraction that was initially there diminishes.

I don't mean apply NLP to myself in "curing" stuttering b/c i've been doing it since age 4....there is NO cure, so i simply have to accept this as a part of me and i'll do it until the day i die.

I just had a thought considering the theory of NLP and more specifically "anchoring". When a non-stutter stutters, they are usually nervous/unconfident/intimidated/don't know what to say so it would be only natural that they anchor the act to those specifics when witnessed in other people.

Is there a way that i can subconsciously reframe that belief in other people? Granted some people have more acceptance than others, but to be honest most are very shallow in this department. When i first speak to someone and i know sooner or later they are going to hear my influent speech or see my facial distortions due to hitting a bad block or what not(even as soon as the opening line), can i somehow TELL them that i stutter, but ANCHOR it to something positive so it will no longer be a turn off?

I know a very smart guy and have the ability to converse on any topic, and if not i can't help but bombard you with questions to learn. I'm not saying that stuttering is a curse b/c it has probably made me tougher person, but it is truly a disadvantage when you're trying to get strangers hot in their panties before they really get to KNOW you. I never thought about this before, so i'm curious if any of the NLP experts here have heard this type
of question before.

Thank you for reading and any help is appreciated!

Beschatten · Posted: Sat May 10, 2008 12:20 pm Post subject:

This is a bit late for a reply but I would say actions can speak louder than words in certain situations. Learn how Mystery uses body language to communicate, and this will definately help with your stutter.

Another way of a girl letting go of the fact that you have a stutter is making creative jokes/openers about it.
Or tell interesting stories about people misunderstanding you because of your stutter that has a humorous twist to it.

Like, this is just an example:

OPENER:
PUA: Write on a piece of paper "Would you rather date a guy with a stutter or in a wheel chair. Circle one".

hand this paper to her.

99.999% of women will most likely choose stutter.
Then just say, "Well its youre lucky day *smile*.

that kind of confidence is crucial and key.
Then to create comfort tell a story where like an asian waiter couldnt understand what you were saying so you ended up leaving the restraunt and you wrote on a piece of paper "fuck you". IDK, something funny.

reverse · Posted: Sat May 10, 2008 9:36 pm Post subject:

Castnett · Posted: Sat May 10, 2008 11:10 pm Post subject:

How would you anchor a stutter to something positive? I don't simply only mean stuttering, but in general, how do you anchor things or objects to something positive?

reverse · Posted: Sat May 10, 2008 11:19 pm Post subject:

Castnett · Posted: Sun May 11, 2008 2:21 am Post subject:

Thanks for the links, reverse. BTW, I am familiar with NLP and anchoring. In regard to anchoring, I know about collapsing anchors to trigger off a particular feeling in any situation (2nd link) and I know about anchoring postive emotions to yourself while talking to another person by pointing to yourself/touching your chest. I just don't understand how to anchor something positive to something commonly perceived as negative/neutral to another person. For example, how would slyder (the OP) anchor his stuttering to something positive so an HB or whoever he is talking to, doesn't judge him b/c of his stutter? Like, could he somehow anchor his stuttering to a positive experience that the HB had in the past, so when he stutters, the positive experience is triggered?

reverse · Posted: Sun May 11, 2008 3:33 am Post subject:

The theory behind anchoring stuttering is the same as anchoring anything. You would elicit the intended feeling (something good) in the person you are trying to anchor to, you then introduce the anchor (you stutter) at the climax of this feeling.

Now, stuttering itself provides an interesting problem, because the fact that you stutter would make it much harder to properly elicit the feeling, and anchor it.

Stuttering while trying to elicit a feeling will most likely make the intensity drop, as it is distracting from the focus.

The other problem I foresee is that you will only want to stutter to set the anchor. Any stuttering before this will not allow the anchor to be set properly.

So, basically what I'm trying to say, is if you stutter, it's very unlikely that you'll be able to anchor stuttering to a positive feeling yourself. However, someone who doesn't stutter could relatively easily use a stutter as an anchor.

The Big Bad Wolf · Posted: Tue May 20, 2008 11:50 pm Post subject:

This is all about inner game, as I view the "problem".

Just allow yourself to be cool about it.
Relax.
Don't let the stutter mean anything.
You're giving it too much power.

Don't let the stuttering make you nervous.
What right has it to control your confidence ?
Don't allow it to become a ball and chain.
The thing that is most important in how people view you is your own internal image. How you view yourself.

If you're cool, calm and collected. Showing great intelligence, and ability to manifest great states in a girl. Speaking with a great control over tonality and tempo. The stutter will diminish to just a small insignificant bump in the road.

It is of no more significance than you make it.

If the rest of you shows no sign of discomfort with it, I see no reason for it to be for any other.

Anchoring would be difficult, as people already usually have anchors to stuttering. Anchoring to voice and speech is not that easy, in my view. It's just as well for you to anchor things to yourself, as the stutter Is a part of you.

But you could try to anchor the stuttering as a source of sex or arousal.
(be creative. Embroider some tale about how Casanova or Don Juan actually had a stutter (it's not lies, it's flirting), or how according to some science journal, people who stutter actually are better in bed,
make up some shit before you go out, preferably with some detail, in case they're curious.)

That may work, but again. I think most people already have things anchored to stutters.
So if you're seeking for easy ways of using NLP or stuff like that, I'd rather go for anchoring good feelings to yourself.

Look into some Ross Jeffries. He is a good source for inspiration into how to anchor good stuff to you.

On the good side, the stutter does separate you from the herd.
Make you stand out a bit.
Let it be a good thing.

Or if it bothers you greatly
what you can do is just to let it go.
If you're finished with it that is.

There's no need to carry on with it if it has no value for you.

I bet there are times, maybe when speaking about something in a relaxed environment, feeling confident and relaxed, when you don't stutter.

If you do, then what does it take to make you stutter =?
Find out this and then look at yourself when you start the stuttering.
notice what it is that makes you go into this behavior.
you can then, if you wish, instead allow yourself to instead become relaxed, or energized, whatever you wish.

But, really, I'm in no way any master of the arts, so if it truly bothers you. Go see a practitioner in NLP or Hypnosis. (or Read up/watch material with Richard Bandler (I recommend Bandler, as there are many who claim they're NLP-practitioners, yet they have no clue who he is.
Which shows how much they know.)
, and gain insight into the field yourself.

Perhaps it is not really a problem at all.

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